Pyramid buffoonery

So Im awake and watching some stupid program on pyramids where yet another talking head is blathering on about how nobody knows how the sarcophagus got hauled down the tiny little passages into the depths of the Great Pyramid.

Has nobody ever fucking thought that they probably schlepped it in and placed it WHILE it was being build, when the slabs forming the roof of the chamber were still off? It isn’t like building a ship in a bottle where you can collapse the masts and rigging, it is a box carven out of a freaking block of stone, no sneaky hidden hinges going on :smack::rolleyes:

Does getting an advanced degree mean losing ones common sense?

I was hoping this would be a thread on keepin fruit fresh and razor blades sharp. :slight_smile:

For some reason, I thought the Pyramids were built while the Pharaoh was still alive.
Putting him in the burial chamber at that point would be…problematic.

Of course, I could be dead wrong. :slight_smile:


No, you’re right. But the question isn’t how they got the Pharaoh in there, it’s how they got the *sarcophagus *in there. Pharaohs are a little smaller and more bendy than stone sarcophagi.

Just because we put our bodies in boxes and then inter the boxes doesn’t mean it was always done that way. Maybe the body was brought to the sarcophagus already interred in the burial chamber.

Or maybe not. I am not an Egyptologist. I’m just trying to…y’know…think outside the box.


Yeah, I seem to remember that a Czech inventor was actually granted a patent on a pyramid shaped box-to keep your razor blades in (it kept them sharp).
Gilette was not impressed.

I rub my edged instruments on wet rocks to keep them sharp. It seems simpler that way.

Yeah, well you’re from Oregon. Wet rocks are a dime a dozen out your way. Just you try and find a wet rock in Egypt that’s not actually in the Nile.

Pyramids were obviously the best blade-sharpening solution available given the technology of the time.

Along those lines is the Winchester House in San Jose, CA. A program I saw tried to make it out as a surreal, supernatural building. When I actually went through it on a tour, common sense took over and I saw a house that was being added on to haphazardly by a rich nutter who had no architectural sense and wouldn’t admit it. Presenting plausible theories is boring; inferring some supernatural phenomenon pulls in a bigger audience.

The thing is to convince your friends and acquaintances to build pyramids, but give you a small share of the profits from each. The key thing is to get them to convince theirfriends and acquaintances to build pyramids too, giving up a small share of the profits, of which you get a smaller portion of – but realize that once you get just twenty pyramid builders, and then they get twenty pyramid builders each, and then they get twenty pyramid builders (and so on), you’ll be richer than you can believe!

ETA: Oh, how do the pyramids make money? Volume!

nm: double post
(now, if I can get someone else to double post, and then get…)

Would not be complete without this song;

A couple of years ago, on a trip to Kelowna. BC. I visited this winery.

They are very proud of their pyramid.


I always thought that the mainstream theory was that the sarcophagus was placed in the King’s Chamber when it was under construction, rather than later, because of the difficulty in getting it through the passages.

Oh. Then that would be different. :smack:

Yeah, but “the mainstream theory is…” gets fewer viewers than “Nobody knows for sure HOW they did it!” and '“Maybe the Egyptians had amazing lost technologies!” and “Maybe aliens built the pyramids!” I mean, why let facts get in the way of a sure fire story that’ll get eyes watching the Swiffer ads?

Curiously, this perfectly describes my approach to home decor through the end of last year. Now my fiancee is in charge of that.

I am left we the impression that we how how the pyramids were built, we just can’t really know how the culture worked such that it was so interconnected with pyramid construction.

I always consider them a social marvel, and less of an engineering marvel (marvels nonetheless).

This was the History Channel special I assume? If so, one of the Academic talking heads is an aquaintance of mine. He laughs about his interviews, because he will come on after the “aliens built them, man” people. He tries to keep it as neat and clean as possible, avoiding too much conjecture.

I swear I would love the money to have a production company that makes follow up documentaries that give more reasonable explanations of this crap …

But then again I know Zahi Hawass is sensible, just an asshole and idiot … :smack: and I can rarely watch him without wanting to slap him silly.

There is a slight supernatural aspect, in that Mrs. Winchester was convinced that she had to keep adding on to confuse the spirits of the Indians killed by her husband’s rifles. So, not just a nutter, but a supernatural believing one. The best kind.