Can I buy placebos over the counter?
The housekeeper has been stealing my wife’s prescription painkillers, and we want to set up a nannycam to catch her in action. I don’t want to let her get her hands on any more of them, either, so the idea is to fill her pill case with placebos as bait.
Next question: are there any placebos that look like Percocet?
No - placebos are for studies i.e. not given to public. IIRC. Why not put a note rolled up into the pill container saying " if you STEAL any more of these we will have you arrested".
If the drug is in capsule form, buy some Diphenhydramine 25 or 50 mg caps (OTC antihistamine). They look like any other capsule.
I don’t know why you call it “bait” unless you are planning to do something afterwards and out didn’t indicate what that might be. If you just want to keep someone from stealing the pills, there are lots of places you could hide them so they won’t be found. You could be creative but a small safe from Wal-Mart isn’t very expensive and will do the trick.
I am not sure of the logic in this question. Just fire the maid and get a new one. Why aren’t you doing that?
Do you want to have her arrested, or just fire her? If the former I’ll bet the police would have some nifty ideas on this.
Can I ask, why not just fire her?
Trust me, I enjoy a vindictive fantasy as much as the next person. But it sounds like your chief concern needs to be getting this drug-stealing twat out of your house ASAP. Next time she’s scheduled to come to work, she should discover the locks have been changed and you waiting for her with her final paycheck.
Not a vindictive fantasy. I want to have something in the box so I can record it to provide evidence for the deputies.
I don’t want to bait the box with something that will cause harm should she manage to get out the door with them. This isn’t a Pollyanna-puppies-and-butterflies sentiment, but a pure matter of liability. For example, if I baited the box with Tylenol, should she OD on them, liver damage could result and I’d be on the hook.
They don’t want to fire her, story in previous MMPs. They want her to know she’s been caught but don’t want to fire her if possible. It’s called “giving people a second chance.”
If they leave a note in the drawer, she can open the drawer, see the note and play the offended princess. “But I wasn’t opening the drawer to steal anything, it wasn’t closed right and pushing on it didn’t work, so I opened it to close it right, and then I see this awful note!” (similar excuse from a nosy cleaning lady of Mom’s)
With a side helping of uniformed cop present and hanging over her head. If she doesn’t play ball, I’ll file charges.
Well, yeah, a second chance, not the keys to the door 
Okay, so you’re looking for something prosecutable, I get that.
I think the chances of a private citizen successfully pulling this off are slim. I agree with the up-thread suggestion that you call the cops or the DEA or whomever and let them provide you with both the bait and the monitoring equipment.
Solution: put the note inside the pill bottle.
Maybe do a Google search for studies that have been done with percocet, involving a control with the placebo, and then shoot an email to the scientists to find out what supply company they use…
Or contact a university, asking the same thing.
And then keep SharkB8 posted on your progress and post the film of the 5 finger Discount confrontation on YouTube.
Maybe her logic is by stealing stuff, she has less to clean.
I wonder if you couldn’t make up some yourself, out of something like marzipan or hard icing. It would fool someone in a hurry, I bet.
Percocet IS Tylenol (acetaminophen) plus oxycodone. As long as the amount of acetaminophen in whatever you put in the pill box is the same or less per tablet than what she’s already getting in the Percocets, I’d say this isn’t much of a worry.
You say you want to give her a second chance, but with “a side helping of uniformed cop present and hanging over her head.” Do you mean you’re going to call the cops, present the evidence, and then offer her a second chance with a cop standing there? I don’t think the cops want you bothering them if you’re not planning to press charges. They’re not henchmen.
And how comfortable is it to keep having this person in your house after that? If you really want to give them a second chance, that’s a private matter, not something to bring the authorities in on.
I still don’t understand. You’re intending to get the authorities involved, possibly sending her to prison . . . but you don’t want to fire her?
What about stuffing the bottle with spring loaded snakes?
I guess I’m a bit slow here, but with video of her stealing placebos, she could be charged with what? Petty theft? Is taking plain Tylenol from a container marked Percocet a drug offense?
I think you should talk to the cops and/or a lawyer first.
I LIKE IT!
For everyone else, my intent is to confront her when she finishes Friday. If it doesn’t go well, call the sheriff and get them involved. If I have to call, charges will be filed and she’s fired.