Rain Man, Crab Legs, and I'm a Moron

I have been in my apartment for about 3 months now and haven’t really taken the time to meet my neighbors. I wave to them as I pass them in the laundry area or walking to my apartment, so we know each other by sight, I just don’t talk to them much.

I doubt their going to start any conversations with me anytime soon after yesterday. Honesty (my SO) and I drove back from Kentucky yesterday (I have family down there) and we were both hungry by the time we got home. Wlaking up to the apartment building, I asked her what she wanted for dinner. As usual she said she wanted crab legs. I started teasing her, saying she was like Rain Man with crab legs and started doing an impression - “Oh, gotta have crab legs, yeah. Definitely need crab legs. Definitely. Oh, there’s a Red Lobster, go to Red Lobster for crab legs, oh!” Then I started doing that banging my hand aganist my head like Dustin Hoffman did when he didn’t want to get on the airplane. Honesty is laughing and telling my to quit. I figure it was because she was tired of me teasing her. I finally did quit and that’s when I realized there were about 6 people out front grilling on the barbecue, all staring at me banging my head and yelling for crab legs. I did the only thing I could think to do - hauled ass into the apartment and order a pizza so I wouldn’t have to go outside in front of those people again.

“Of course I’m not wearing any underwear…”

Now THAT would have been bad.

May have been bad, but not entirely untrue. (nudge nudge, wink, wink. Know what I mean? Say no more, Say no more!)

PS - Monty Python fans will understand the part in parentheses. As for the rest of you, go rent some Python!

Yikes. Reminds me of a girl I knew in College. Long, Straight blonde hair. Nice as anything, we go together every day during chapel in the The Wig (a grill).

Anyway, I go in there, I see her, think “Cool, I’ll startle her”, slide in beside her, put my arm around her and say “Hi”. Then I realized it wasn’t the girl I knew.

Oops. I swear I felt time stand still while I thought “God how do I get out of this without looking like a moron?” Then suddenly…

“Guess What,” I said wittly.
“What?” she ask, looking at me odd.
“I have no clue who you are.” I said.
“Yup, you looked like a friend of mine.”
She introduced herself, I gave her my name. I had to run to class then (thank God!) So I left. Saw Cami the next day and told her, she laughed herself silly.

First time I’d ever been that quick witted. Survival instinct, I think. :smiley:

Damn my memory…I used to know that entire skit. I do remember this one…
“Of course it’s got a 'ole in it! It wouldn’t be an 'oop if it didn’t 'ave an 'ole in it!”

double take Not entirely untrue?! Oh my… :wink:

Well at least you had the decency to be embarassed. My BF deliberately tries to embarass me in public. We get into line in the grocery store and blurts out things like…“Honey! Did you remember to take your medication.” And “Sweetie! Did you forget to get those steaks your brother wanted, you know he wrote you he wanted a Tbone when his parole comes through!” He picks up things like choke chains and leashes and says stuff like…“OOH Honey! We don’t have one of these in the collection do we?”

I’ve stopped asking him to go shopping with me, even if he does push the cart.


Needs2Know - I was only embarrassed cuz I wasn’t expecting anybody, but Honesty and I tease each other like that in the stor a lot. I love the look on people’s faces at the grocery store when I shout out to her, “Hey, sweetie, did you remember to pick up the ointment for that rash?” Or (and she got mad about his one), “Don’t forget to pick up some KY Jelly, I’m feeling frisky tonight!”

This is not really meant to embarrass her, as much as it is a game with us to embarrass the people who overhear. She once called down the isle to me, “Don’t forget to see if they have some smaller size condoms, the last ones keep slipping off you.”