The day you hear a song that was BANNED at your high school dances, (Saturday Night’s Allright for Fighting, for anyone curious), played as Musak. On an elevator.
Hell, my daughter’s seven and she can kick my ass at the Wii we’ve only had for two months! (Fortunately, I can still beat my five year old son handily).
However, I’ve been feeling old for a long time now, so that wasn’t the first trigger.
When I got married at 21, I realized that I now had adult obligations that trumped any of my interests.
When I became a father at 27, I realized that all humans are a part of a wonderful chain that stretches from the past into the future and through me.
When I performed the marriage ceremony for my niece at age 57, I realized that I had arrived in “patriarch” territory.
When I retired at age 59m I realized that life has a lot more to offer than careers.
When I developed a list of ever-shifting ills, I knew I was a senior citizen…and continuing on…
The day you realize that your dad had a 6, 8, and 9 year old, a divorce, a remarriage, and a mortgage under his belt when he was your age, while you are still single.
When you realize your childhood pet has had 3 replacements.
When you realize the stories you keep telling about your wild times are all a decade old.
And I’m just thinking that if I can make it to my twenty-first birthday in two and a half months all of my milestones will be past!
Becoming the oldest living member of your family.
Realizing that you won’t see the tree you just planted full grown.
Hot thirty-something women calling me sir is just depressing.
Not caring how fast the car at the dealership can go 0-60mph.
Actually being happy that a policeman has moved into a house on the same street as you.
Speaking of policemen… it’s a little unnerving the first time you see a policeman and find yourself thinking, “My God, he’s just a KID!”
Same with clergymen, airline pilots, or any other authority figure.
Your first mammogram or prostate exam.
The first time you call in a repairman (I say as the plumber is in my basement) for your own house.
The first time you drop everything to be there for your mother, the way she did when you were a kid.
When you buy your first house (holy crap! They gave us a HOUSE!), then you realize that you can do pretty much whatever you want with it. Then you realize you really can’t, because there are neighbours, and building codes and city bylaws, and you have to pay for any changes. And then you realize that being an adult has a lot of freedom, but it isn’t anywhere near absolute freedom.
When you first become the age at which your parents were when you knew them at their youngest.
(if that makes sense)
When I became an attorney and started having “clients.” Very grown up, indeed.
When people started calling me “ma’am.” I hate that.
When I realized I had no idea who half the people being nominated for grammies were. Never heard of 'em.
When I realized that when my mother was my age, she was married to her second husband and had two kids.
When staying out late at bars drinking was no longer fun. Nightclubs? No thanks.
Just the other week I realized I hadn’t made it up past 10 o’clock in months. Man.
Did I mention I’m only 32?
Sorry, do these work better for you:
First sexually transmitted disease
First pregnancy scare
First time stood up for a date
First time you piss blood
First time you sneak away from someone’s house in the middle of the night because you don’t want to see them in the morning
First time you bounce a check and it cascades through your account leaving you penniless
First arrest
First DUI
First time you go to sleep rather than have sex because you’re just too tired from chasing after your kids all day
First fight with your new spouse
First dinner party ruined by a drunken friend/relative
First Thanksgiving you spend away from family
Of course, many of those you can hit before you’re really into adulthood
Came to say the first POTUS that’s younger than me but was beaten to the punch.
Not long ago I was introduced to a lovely, mature woman. I was thinking to myself “For an older lady she looks quite attractive. Downright sexy in fact. Despite the difference in our ages, I would definitely hit that!”
Yeah,… found out later she was in fact several years *younger *than me. That really made me feel old.
I just got back to this thread and I can’t believe what i’m seeing.
My post was obviously tongue in cheek. I know that the President is an American citizen and I could care less what religion he is. I freaking voted for him.
I thought it would be understood I was joking, but I guess not. Sorry.
Preferring MILF or mature porn.
Rarely discussed indeed.
the day when you fire somebody.
or: the day when you realize that you are the key person in your office, and they can’t fire you.
I got one today.
My little neice tells me she is 42 and has two boys 15 and 19.
Hell this year 40 from college and 45 from HS,