Outside? I like **Beckdawreck’**s answer. I don’t want him to suffer while dying but I want even less for me to suffer while dispatching him.
Inside? I strap the lid on the trash can so he can’t get out, I take him far away from my house and then I try to kill him with a baseball bat or something so I can reclaim the trash can. If he survives the gauntlet, he deserves to have his sentence commuted provided he respects his banishment.
I’d let it out. Killing anything without a good reason is not in my game plan. The last thing I killed deliberately was a mole in 1993.
Ok, so here’s what we ended up doing. We placed a couple more bags over the trash can, then put the platter over it, with the goal being to make it safer for me to carry the trash can outside without the rat escaping or biting me. Then we tore a small hole at the top of the bags, stuck a garden hose in and turned on the water. We put a couple bricks on the platter so it couldn’t be moved by the rat. We filled the trash can and stood by to make sure he didn’t find a way out. We could hear some struggling but then nothing. We left it alone overnight.
I think there was a small chance the rat could have floated to the top, found an air pocket and crawled out. I’ll check on the situation after work today. Hopefully I’ll find a drowned rat.
Yeah, I was wondering whether this was the next verse to “Ants in the cat food what do I do?,” or a UB40 song.
Teach him to surf…?
Given your location I would suggest a spear for just such emergencies. Or at least a machete.
If your intent is to grab the rat, stuff him in the potato gun, and launch him at a less-than-favorite neighbor ------ we just may be related! 
I have a 3lb muzzleloading cannon I’ve used to launch rubber chickens but with the right wadding I can see it ----------
No neighbor involved unless I get his permission to launch the rodent into his yard while he’s letting his Jack Russel terrier enjoy the weather (and the ballisticly launched squeaky toy).
Consider what this did to your karmaic burden. :dubious:
I rescued a mouse from the cat, put him in a jar and took him out to the garden.
Little bastard beat me back to the house! I saw him darting under the porch as I climbed the stairs.
I keep potent rat poison. We’ve lost mega $$$ to the rat population in the barn. It got so bad they would follow Mr.Wrekker to the dog kennel when he filled the auto-feeders. He orders pallets of Dog feed and straw for their bedding. Full of rats. He started a campaign of ridding his barn of the critters. Poison, traps, and one pitiful overfed cat. It took 6mos to see a difference. Spring came, he had to start all over. It’s an on-going war.
This past fall they got to nesting in the woodpile. That was an experience, let me tell you. Pull out a log and 3 rats jump and run. Nearly had a stroke several times. A big black snake took up housekeeping there and the rats moved out or were eaten.
OP, the drowning cure was inspired.
Nor in mine. I kill rats because they are of the species Rattus rattus, and act it.
You know what’ll happen if your cat eats a poisoned rat, right?
In a similar situation, I bashed it with a can of paint until it stopped moving. (mouse, this time)
Yes. My Siamese never go out. The barn cat has killed many, many rats. As far as we can tell she never eats them. She’s well fed on catfood. She’s been out in that barn nearly a decade. If she’s using up her lives on poison rats, so be it. She volunteered for the job when she wandered on to the place.
If it’s still there after getting that wet and miserable, I bet it looks like a drowned rat…
If I’m reincarnated as a rodent then you may have a point. I’d like to think I get a small bonus for how happy I made the dog though.
Chicken in the bread pan pickin’ out dough
Granny will your dog bite, no child no.
Whatever you do, do not let it go. It’ll just come back and make more trouble for you. It’s even worse because now he’s learned where the trap is and what the trap is and will avoid it.
Gather Daisy, Minnie, Donald, Pluto and Goofy for an intervention. “Mickey, dude, you have GOT to lay off the booze!”
I guess I would have to cough up the bucks for an emergency exterminator to come get it, there is no freaking way I would let it out or attempt to handle it myself. I hope it is dead. Ugh.
This thread is just begging for this