The cat came back, it wouldn’t stay away… etc, etc.
I babysat a friend’s cat for about 18 months while she moved apartments and found a new job. During our time together, kitty and I bonded and all was good. Two years ago the owner found an apartment that allowed pets and I gave her back. Haven’t seen kitty since she left.
Yesterday, she returned. The bad economy forced friend to move again, this time across the country. Kitty had nowhere to go during the turmoil but back to me, and she seems extremely pissed off about it. Yowled and complained during the 2-hour car ride and urinated in the carrier. She doesn’t seem to remember me or my place, which may be complicated by the fact that I’ve had new carpeting put in since she was here.
She even hissed at me last night, and again this morning. She never did that last time. Then she came over to be petted, and seconds after I petted her she hissed at me again.
Is there anything I can do to help her remember me and her surroundings?
Kitty is angry and frightened. And who could blame her?
Cats are more connected, it seems, to places than to people and she’s had more than a fair share of shuffling about.
If you were friends before, perhaps it will take a few days before she adjusts. I would give her all the comforts and plenty of space. Ignored kitties often find a warm lap an attractive spot and can be cranky about being rushed into relationships.
Has your friend left? If not, perhaps she has something she can give you that would remind kitty of her former home.
Sorry, couldn’t resist. Poor kitty. I second the advice about being patient–kindness and patience and food will most likely win the day. One of my cats could barely stand being around our two new kittens awhile back–he hissed at them, took swipes at them and ran them off whenever they got near each other, but now, a few months later, they sleep in a big pile. Cats, especially ones who are well treated, are adaptable, but they’re also creatures of habit. It takes time for them to adjust to new situations.
IME, cat’s don’t seem so bright on the “remembering individuals in their absence” axis. I’ve seen a mom cat hiss and fight with her own kitten, treating it like a stranger cat, after being separated for many years.
Poor catto has been through a lot. I’m sure she’ll come back around after a settling in period.
Sometimes they can. About a year after I moved out, my ex-husband put his cat (that we got together, that he wanted to keep) in a shelter. Upon finding this out, I went and got her and adopted her. Even though I’d not been in the house for over a year, and even though she had most definitely been his cat, she took to me right away, nuzzling my hand, hiding against me, following me around the house. That still didn’t keep her from being pissy in a new environment.
I agree - cats can and do remember people. I only visit my parents once a year at Christmas, and their cats remember me - at least, they don’t run off if I approach them, they let me pick them up, etc. If I was a stranger they’d be gone.
I was once roommates with a couple who got a kitten after we moved in together. We went our separate ways after six months, and months (or even more than a year) might go by between my visits to them. The cat would always give me a look like “oh, hullo, where the hell have you been?” I’d immediately go pick him up, and he’d nuzzle into my shoulder and purr, just like when he was a kitten.
About the hissing: One of my cats hissed quite a bit when I first got him . . . at me and at the other cat. He would even hiss sometimes while playing or eating. But it never seemed to be out of anger or aggression; it was just his way of dealing with anything unexpected. He would, for example, be playing . . . then hiss . . . then resume playing. Gradually he’s doing it less and less, and now only does it when he’s startled by the other cat.
Any cat needs time to process change. I never expect a cat to eat or be social the first 3 days. My first cat was catnapped from me by the neighbors and was gone for 6 months. When we got her back, she was pregnant and pissy as all get-out, but she obviously remembered us and the house…went right to her favorite spot on the quilt frame, drank from the tub faucet like always. She just didn’t get into a better mood for the first week or so, and she wasn’t friendly at all until the kittens were born. then she was back to her sweet old self…with the exception of now being an awesome mom to six kittens.
I would ignore the cat. Cats hate that, if she wants to play or sit on your lap, polietly decline. That will make her want it all the more. Then after a week you can play with the cat.
I also recommend a high place. Cats feel a lot safer up high. See if you can fix a shelf or something so that kitty can look down on you and feel superior.
She’s doing better. The evening of the second day she started asking for serious petting and stopped hissing at me. Still seems a little skittish, but definitely acting much more as I remember her.
I’ve stayed home the last two days, but will go out to work today. Give her some time alone to relax.
