To the anonymous driver I encountered earlier this evening:
When I stepped out into the crosswalk you were still way up at the top of the hill, oh anonymous stupid fucking driver. You were so far away that by the time you got to the crosswalk I was about three steps away from the far curb. There was more than enough time for you to see both me and the sign: you know, the one which identifies this as a crosswalk and reminds you of your legal obligation to yield to the goddamned pedestrians!!!
So why oh why did you not even slow down? Why did you find it necessary to honk your horn as you screamed past behind me so close that you could probably have lifted the change from my back pocket if you’d had the window rolled down?
Is it perhaps because you’re a reckless, ignorant, inconsiderate piss-shitter who shouldn’t be trusted with any motorized vehicle that doesn’t come from Toys’R’Us?
Fucking half-wit. May the gasoline in your ill-deserved vehicle magically turn into fresh horse shit just before it explodes, leaving you stranded at the side of Route 1 covered in shit in the middle of the night next to the pile of scrap metal that used to be your car.
And may the tow truck driver who eventually rescues you constantly mutter “Blood, blood, blood…” under his breath as he drives you home, so you can get a taste of the terror you just put me through. Asshole!
I sympathize. But let’s take the title literally and also go the other way. Is “DON’T WALK” too much for your brain to handle, college student? I realize you’re the most important person in the world, so you probably shouldn’t risk the world losing that incredible mind of yours by having it be slammed into a car that you just stepped out in front of. And yeah, the sign says “WALK” - not “MOSEY”, “AMBLE”, or even, “STOP WALKING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD AND WAVE TO YOUR FRIEND WHO IS STILL HALF A BLOCK AWAY AND WAIT THERE UNTIL SHE SHOWS UP, OBLIVIOUS TO THE TRAFFIC YOU’RE BLOCKING.” (yes, I’ve seen that).
Not personally, but sadly I have seen the behaviour you describe. It’s probably a good thing that I’m too much of a wallflower to scream at my fellow pedestrians in the street; I would have gotten into fights by now otherwise.
But it would be nice if obeying the traffic laws (which I do, thankyouverymuch) would be enough to keep me from getting flattened every time I cross a street. Sadly, if wishes were horses I wouldn’t be walking to the office, now would I?
And I get to brave the deathtrap again this morning, yay! Wish me luck…
Oh, come move to Montreal and then you’ll have something to bitch about. Insane drivers + intrepid pedestrians + ice is a real picnic at about 5:30 in the afternoon.
And another thing: Drivers, don’t stop and wave me on if you have the right of way! You will only piss of the drivers behind you ‘cuz I ain’t going nowhere. This may have escaped your feeble little mind, but traffic is going 2 ways. Just because you stop does not mean that the drivers in the other lane will do the same.
BinaryDrone, I’m not sure if you’re speaking from a pedestrian point of view or a driver’s. Pedestrians always have right of way; if a pedestrian is hit by a car, the car is always at fault. Drivers should not wave you on, but as a pedestrian, you should also be aware that when I’m driving, I don’t have the right to go before the pedestrian who is exhibiting signs of wanting to cross the street. And yes, I know that pedestrians need to wait until they’re sure they’re not taking their lives in their hands by stepping out; I will patiently wait for you, watching you all the while so you can see I see you, while you wait for all traffic to stop. But you need to go once it’s safe.
And on a related note, pedestrians, if you’re not waiting to cross the road, get the heck away from the crosswalk. I am LEGALLY OBLIGATED to stop for a pedestrian trying to cross; if you’re standing around waiting for a bus, or just generally picking your nose, can you do it in a way that doesn’t look like you’re trying to cross a street? You’re making the rest of the intelligent pedestrians look bad. (I had a showdown with an old man who was standing for no apparent reason in a crosswalk, just a little off the sidewalk. I came to a halt, watched him and waited for him, and he waved me on. I waited and waited, and he just stood there. Finally I took a chance with my driver’s license and went, because he obviously wasn’t going anywhere, but he was creating a dangerous situation for both drivers and pedestrians around him.)
Keep in mind, however, that regardless of who’s at fault, the guy in the care is more likely to walk away from the incident. There’s no point in being “right” if you have to be paralyzed from the neck down to do it. This is not to say drivers shouldn’t follow the law, but I have heard many a college student declare that it’s okay to walk out in front of a moving car because it’s the cars fault if they get hit, seemingly unaware that most cars aren’t made of foam rubber.
No, no, see I am talking about a situation where (as the intelligent pedestrian) I am actually waiting at a “Don’t Walk” signal and a car in one lane stops to “be nice”. There is no way I am going. This would be like being stopped at a red light and having some dude that has the green stop and wave you on. Good way to get creamed!
Oh yes, I must express my distaste also for those wonderful drivers who, when seeing a pedestrian in the crosswalk, merely slow down, and try to get within 2 inches of the pedestrian in order to make them go faster. Every time they do this, I’m so tempted to stop in the middle of the lane they wish to turn in to and make them wait 10 seconds longer, but I just don’t want to get injured.
Oh yes, I must express my distaste also for those wonderful drivers who, when seeing a pedestrian in the crosswalk, merely slow down, and try to get within 2 inches of the pedestrian in order to make them go faster. Every time they do this, I’m so tempted to stop in the middle of the lane they wish to turn in to and make them wait 10 seconds longer, but I just don’t want to get injured.
“Exhibiting signs of wanting to cross the street”? That’s a bit of an exaggeration. I was in the passenger seat of a car driven by my ex-boyfriend in Manhattan and he seemed to be driving with that philosophy. Needless to say, he held up a lot of traffic. Doesn’t anyone standing on a street corner look like they’re thinking about crossing the street? Personally, I have proudly mastered the art of crossing the street in Manhattan. You cross when there is no car close enough to hit you - end of story. Sometimes to scare you the cabs speed up and pretend they’re going to hit you, but if you give them a “courtesy jog” (i.e. not enough to actually get you across the street faster but instead to let them know that you have no right to be exercising your “right of way”), they calm down.
I spent three days in Rome a couple of years ago, and developed a love/hate relationship with the drivers there. I spent the entire time walking from monument to monument, so I had plenty of time to learn to interact with those crazy Italian drivers.
A friend clued me in to the proper way to cross a street in Rome. “What is it?” you ask? You stand at the edge of the street (no crosswalks here, or lanes lines, and damn few lights) and when you’re ready to cross, take a deep breath and start walking. That’s it. Keep a steady pace, DO NOT look at the drivers that are seemingly about to mow you down, and keep walking. The cars, trucks and ubiquitous scooters simply weave around you and continue on their way, while you go on yours.
It’s almost like an amusement park ride, scary and fun at the same time, and if I were to try it here in the States I wouldn’t last a day.
Hey, you! Yeah, you, the one ahead of me crossing against the light! I don’t give a shit if you want to take your life in your hands but why the fuck can’t you reach out and hit the button so people behind you can actually get a walk signal?
And you, yeah all five of you on the opposite corner! That signal will not change to “walk” unless one of you presses the button!
You know, up here in Calgary, we have uncontrolled crosswalks.
A good example is right in front of my apartment. Between the
apartment complex and the grocery store, there’s a crosswalk.
Painted lines, two signs… but no signals. People are just supposed
to stop when they see a pedestrian. Like that ever works.
So, let’s not go painting all us peds with such a wide brush, eh?
where walk signs only last long enough for a marathon runner to get across the street. Your average pedestrian, at brisk walking speed, frequently finds him/herself unable to make it to the opposite curb before the light turns red… and the cross-traffic will roll as soon as the light turns green, pedestrian who is two feet in front of the car be damned. Hell, we have intersections where the light will turn from red to green to yellow and back to red again faster than a single car can get through the intersection. I have personally witnessed this phenomenon. Scary.
We had a little girl killed out here- she was riding her bike across the street (walk sign in her favor), the light changed on her before she could get across, traffic rolled…
We lose a significant portion of our senior population this way every year…
but the drunken tourists who blunder into oncoming traffic to cross the Strip (where there are traffic lights aplenty, in the only area of town where walk lights last long enough for a normal human being to get to the other side) never seem to get hit, or even honked at.