Reality TV season finale thread

[StarvingButStrong]

I don’t usually comment on the decisions of the game runners, but their choices turned the Women’s Championship into sort of a farce.

For those who didn’t watch, they had each woman run the first course individually, and then the four who did the best (went the furthest, fastest) would get to skip the next round, and the four with the worst times were eliminated. The middle eight contestants then went into head-to-head race offs, with the losers eliminated and the winners moving on to the third round – giving eight contestants, leading to a round of four, then two giving the final winner.

IOW, the third round ended up being races between four women who had only run a single course (and had had more time to rest since) and four women who had had to also run the second, longer course with a relatively shorter time to rest. Guess what happened? Every single contest ended with the women who had had to run the second round eliminated by the woman who had gotten the bye. What a surprise, eh?

Basically they might as well have declared that only the top four women from the first race would go on and the other 12 were eliminated.

So stupid.

(BTW, why are all the top women white? In the men’s contest, there are blacks, hispanics, asians …. There are plenty of minority women on the pro sports teams, the Olympic teams, etc. Why none in Ninja?)

[DKW]

I’ll have a lot more to say about the Women’s Championship in a bit (per usual for ANW, this is taking me more than one day to finish) but in short: total agreement, and I’m glad that someone else here noticed. Dammit, I miss Meagan Martin.

[DKW]

American Ninja Warrior 5th Women’s Championship - NBC, 2 hours, 9/1/25

There are three types of obstacles in ANW, the ones where they have to support their entire body weight by their arms for an unreasonable amount of time, or “arm rip offers (AROs)”, the ones which require quickness and balance, or “speed speeders (SSs)”, and the extraordinarily rare bizarro one-off thingies that are neither, or “what evers (WEs)”. To start off, the whole field of 16 takes on a preliminary course one at a time. The first five tasks are 1. Quad Steps (SS) 2. Lunatic Ledges (WE; it’s a quick arm swing followed by a full-body swing and jump) 3. Log Runner (SS) 4. Crank It Up (ARO) 5. V Formation (ARO). A nice mix. That will change. Capping it off is Warped Wall, which was a formidable final test about ten years ago and is now just a speed bump. You’re not supposed to have a problem with this. Top 4 finishers earn byes, while the bottom 4 are toast.

Quick rundown of prelims. Contestants’ ages given when known.

Jessie Graff, 40, Log Runner 33:45, 10th - The last of the old guard which included luminaries like Michelle Warnky Burma and Meagan Martin. She has prosperous careers in both movies and circus, so it’s pretty remarkable that she’s here at all. She’s been declining, but slowly, and she insanely popular so she’s going to stick around for a while yet. (Check out that house! )
Barclay Stockett, 30, Lunatic Ledges 28.40, 14th - “Bars” is notable for not only being the first out lesbian on the show, but the first to be happily married. So of course she gets completely trashed and has about as much screen time as a third-string punter in every event she’s in, this one included.
Emily Gardiner, 17, finished 3:25.11, 6th - Ooh, plastic jewelry! That’s a thing that exists! I don’t really like to use that line!
Rachel Degutz, 26, Lunatic Ledges 26.58, 11th and Abby Clark, 31, Crank It Up 1:25.20, 8th - NBC, thanks to never allowing enough damn time for this, always has to send several runs to bumrushed highlight reel land, so nothing interesting about this pair except that they’re from New Jersey, and man, the dad jokes just write themselves, don’t they?
Mady Howard, 29, finished 2:56.11, 5th - Question: Does a three-year-old son have any right to suck all the air out of the room? He’s not a baby! I thought you had to be a baby to get 500 cutaways to you and completely wreck the flow of what’s supposedly the point of this competition!
Megan Rowe, ? (but definitely over 18 ), Lunatic Ledges 35.10, 15th BHRL, nice knowin’ ya!
Katie Bone, 18, Lunatic Ledges 27.05, 12th - The bad news is that she has diabetes and is coming back from an injury. The good news is that she went out very early so they were only able to cut away to that dog one hundred times!
Isabella Folsom, 20, finished 2:52.03, 4th - First seen on American Ninja Warrior Junior, she’s become a fixture in the later rounds of the regular contest. Which I’d be a lot happier about if NBC didn’t grossly trump up a woman changing her name upon marriage as this great beautiful wonderful virtuous thing. Seriously, BRRRR.
Alyssa Beird, ? (but definitely over 18 []), Lunatic Ledges 27.19, 13th and Casey Rothschild, 26, Crank It Up 1:36.11, 9th - Fun fact: My sister also lives in Massachusetts, and she’s manage to go her whole life without pretending that’s a big deal for some bizarre reason!
Zhanique Lovett, 38, Quad Steps 3.70, dead last - Age hit her a lot harder than Graff. Did I mention that she’s a super duper booper mom? Two sons! Two! (That did not look at all rushed…)
Addy Herman, 19, finished 2:46.99, 3rd - A legit ANWJ powerhouse who only got stronger with age, her ascent capped off with an stunning triumph in last year’s Women’s Championship. She celebrated by…bringing…ninja…to Sierra Leone. Two steps forward and one step into left field.
Caitlin Bergstrom-Wright, 27, V Formation [time not given], 7th and Anabella Heinrichs, 20, finished 2:46.18, 2nd - Look, look, someone failed on Warped Wall! It’s relevant! RELEVANT, I TELL YOU!!
Taylor Greene, 17, finished 2:20.68, 1st - She made huge waves in ANWJ by overpowering some pretty game boys, and she’s only gotten more formidable since. In the last Women’s Championship, she made it all the way to the final only to suffer a humiliating one-sided loss to Addy Herman. Needless to say, that’s only stoked her fires even more. (Man, she is jacked! )

The remainder of the contest took place on a single head-to-head course, which was…drumroll please…one SS followed by five freaking straight AROs! Just what you want for a female-only contest! I could describe them, but seriously, why the hell bother? Shots of the first round matchup participants, followed by the bye earners, four tall, light-skinned blondes between the ages of 17 and 20. More on this in a bit.

In the first round, Bone, Degutz, Clark, and Bergstom-Wright knocked off Howard, Gardiner, Rothschild, and Graff, respectively. (Rothschild/Clark had a particular howler of an intro, emphasizing their track background for a course that’s precisely 16.67% footwork. )

The free pass-ees stepped up in second round matches, Greene vs. Clark, Bone vs. Folsom, Bergstrom-Wright vs. Heinrichs, and Degutz vs. Herman. In other words, the four strongest competitors who also got to rest their arms in the first round faced four not the strongest competitors about to take on the same arm-shredders they just took on a few minutes ago, and guess what happened. I mean, geez, I would’ve been happy with ONE upset! (Greene, in particular, was so overpowering that she whiffed on one of the transitions three times and still won in a walk.)

The first semi saw Greene made the demolition of a top challenger like Folsom look easy. It was almost scary how calm and methodical she was; I honestly got flashbacks to Brian Arnold. Folsom, to her credit, did finish (the only loser all night who did), but that was very small comfort. Then Herman and Heinrichs both completely gassed out on #6, with Herman getting the nod due to finishing #5 faster. Oh dear.

All right, rematch of last year’s final! Herman won running away that time, but that was a rapid climb where Greene lost her footing. Can she pull off the repeat on a near total arm-destroyer? Find out as I cover the pulse-pounding final IN ITS ENTIRETY!

=== Championship match: Addy Herman vs. Taylor Greene ===

Herman has a razor thin lead through the steps. They’re on the frames, where…

** SPLOOOOSHH **

Uggggghhhh. Herman takes a bath on the second transition, Greene doesn’t, and this one’s over. It was over in 10 seconds, for crying out loud. On the plus side, we’ve now had 5 different winners in as many events, meaning that this will remain an unpredictable hard-fought event for years to come provided that Greene signs with the WNBA within the next 11 months.

The problem with the Women’s Championship is the same problem as the regular contest: Only one type of contestant has a chance, which means that crunch time is way too predictable and everyone looks the same. None of the bottom 12 had any chance against the 4 homogenized front-runners, and nobody was beating iron-armed Taylor Greene tonight. NBC didn’t butcher this, but they did something almost as bad; they drained the life out of it.

I am done. No, this time I completely, totally, honest-to-Reimu 200% no backsies take it to the grave mean it. There is nothing left for me to talk about here. If I’m going to get way too involved in a time-waster, it had better at least be an interesting time waster, not this lifeless gruel.

[DKW]

Will be doing Masterchef soon…hopefully finished by Friday night, but no promises, of course. In the meantime, I just wanted to go in-depth about the recently-concluded Lego Masters Jr. That is to say, I wanted to go in-depth, but the whole experience was so devoid of substance that I simply can’t.

Here’s what happened. Five teams of two young’uns, each assisted by an adult mentor, had three rounds of competition, and at the end if the first and second rounds, one of the…not one thousand, not one hundred, not forty, not sixteen, not twelve, FLIPPING FIVE teams was eliminated amidst lots of tears and a feeble attempt at placation with a consolation prize. (These were actually very good as reality TV prizes go, but I can’t imagine it made up for getting the boot after just one or two rounds.) Holy crap, WHY??? American Ninja Warrior Junior specifically sought out children who could handle defeat gracefully, and by the third installment were twisting themselves into knots to spread the good vibes and ease the sting of failure, and they still got swamped by so many tears that they decided it was hopeless and completely pulled the plug! And you’re telling me that anudda wun bi da dus is SO holy, SO inviolable, SO ironclad that you can’t even avoid it when you KNOW it’s going to hurt these kids?

On top of that, three episodes is simply way, way too few to care at all. Eight should be considered the absolute bare-bones minimum. If you can’t find that many contestants, keep everyone for the duration and score them after each episode, highest score wins. It’s that easy! The builds themselves weren’t anything special, certainly not up to the really good Lego Masters works.

This comes across more as a goofy idea a la The Real Dirty Dancing, or Buddy Games that the network threw out to see if it had any legs, and I expect to go the same place. Even not having Will Arnett can’t save this one.

[DKW]

Snuck a peek at the Dancing With The Stars discussion on Primetimer…aaaaand they’re griping that the scores are too low. Why, after all these years, have they not done the ridiculously easy and obvious fix of simply ranking the couples top-to-bottom each episode, and doing the same for fan votes, which would not only instantly solve all kinds of problems but be flexible enough to…oh, right, the judges would have to wait until the end of the episode to bellow numbers like freaking boxing referees, and there’d be much fewer opportunities for the peanut gallery to howl BEHUEUHHWWUUHUHWUHUHUHUUU, can’t have that! Man, I have no idea why I quit this show…

Masterchef season 24 finale - Fox, 2 hours, 9/17/25

And so, after an inordinate number of advancing-the-game-free episodes even for Fox (and I still fail to understand why not trebuchetting a freaking quarter of the field after two days wasn’t an option…separate them into groups if kitchen space is that freaking precious, for crying out loud) we’re down to the last 3 pairs. (Side note: Since when is 3 the absolute sacrosanct number for finals contestants now? I remember when 2 was the standard, and I don’t recall anyone ever having a problem with that. Heck, I still remember that one season of DWTS that had 5 finallists, which Primetimer and a few other places were absolutely apoplectic about, and for the life of me I could not see why. Quibbling over exactly how tiny the portion of the cast that doesn’t get sacrificed to the rapacious anudda wun bi da dus machine should be seems silly to me, and if you’re going to stake a claim on a number, I’d like some actual arguments, please.)

Tina/Aivan - A plucky aunt and niece of Vietnamese origin who’ve rarely ventured outside their comfort zone. Not the strongest, smartest, or quickest contestants by any means, but they’re cool under fire and nothing gets them down. And they’ve had an uncanny knack for ALWAYS landing on the good side of the ridiculous twist, the boneheaded setup, the screwball fluke (with being on the Winning Team in the round of 6 being the latest crazy escape). With no one to hide behind anymore, can they be the best when it counts?
Rachel/Julio - A multicultural, well-travelled, highly affectionate married couple who always goes for the green on their dishes…and unfortunately sometimes ends up in the bunker. They’ve impressed the judges enough to avoid the axe, but can they keep it together for three very challenging dishes?
Jesse/Jessica - A proudly unmarried long-term couple, plenty of skill and full of energy but prone to inopportune blowups. Can they handle the unrelenting pressure of the finale?

Appetizers. Tina/Aivan have Vietnamese prawn salad with crispy leeks and chili garlic vinaigrette. Compliments all around, but Gordon thinks it’s a bit too simple. (A lot of Far East dishes are designed to be uncomplicated, so if that’s all they know, that could be a disadvantage.) Jesse/Jessica have pan-seared scallops & pork belly with corn puree, pickled jalapeno, apple gastrique, and crispy Brussels sprouts. (Dang, at least two components there that I would not appreciate at all.) Other than the corn puree being a little too thick, nailed it. Rachel/Julio have saffron empanada with braised mojo pork, apple fennel salad, garlic and paprika aioli, and cilantro sauce. (Never had anything like it before, but that sure sounds appetizing! ) Fine overall but a little light on the filling.

Entrees. Tina/Aivan have Vietnamese crispy skin salmon with lemongrass chili sauce, garlic rice, and bok choy. One of the salmon pieces was slightly overdone and the rice wedges were a little too blocky, but otherwise great work. Jesse/Jessica have braised short rib with caci e pepe gnocchi, baby carrots and fennel mushrooms, parmesan frico, and veal demi-glace. This is the kind of dish that most chefs would like to take a lot more time with, and it shows as one of them is tough (the other two are fine, though). Rachel & Julio have squid ink tortellini with lobster medallions, moqueca sauce, and cilantro oil. Squid ink is an ingredient that’s tricky to get the right amount, so they were really aiming high with this. And again compliments all around. Offhand it looks like Rachel/Julio have the edge going into the final round.

Desserts. Tina/Aivan have mango mousse with almond crumb, sesame ginger tuile, and yuzu sorbet. Judges are complimentary, but it looks ordinary to me. Rachel/Julio have pina colada layer cake with vanilla chantilly, caramelized pineapple, and cherry coulis…oh no. OH NO. The instant Gordon cuts into it, it transforms into a sticky, gooey mess. Rachel confesses to putting too much gelatin in the glaze.

They’re toast. You can have a less-than-perfect dish in the finale, but a blunder this big is instant death. Damn, they were so good all season long only to crash and burn on the last lap. That’s just sheer cruelty.

That leaves Jesse/Jessica with their dark chocolate ganache tart with marshmallow meringue, raspberry coulis, maple pecan brittle, and crème fraiche ice cream. Lot of stuff here, which of course means a lot of opportunities to screw up. And…it’s…a masterpiece!

Now, before I reveal the winner, I’d like to address all the misplaced anger the final decision received. Yeah, there’s plenty of fuming all around (including Primetimer, of course), which I think is based on a major misunderstanding about how reality TV works. See, if this was a viewer vote-based show like DWTS or American Idol, every result would get flushed down the toilet at the end of the round and absolutely nothing would carry over and consistency would mean nothing at all and the only thing that actually decided the winner would be the final. Furthermore, if the votes went to a contestant the judges thought didn’t deserve to win or even outright disliked, they had no recourse. In a show were the judges have total power, however, they absolutely can take overall performance into consideration, and they have no obligation to give the win to someone they deem unworthy. It’s the same reason there used to be those screamfests about how this or that yokozuna candidate TOTALLY SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN tsunatori AND IT’S A GODDAM OUTRAGE blah blah blah etc., always forgetting that the Sumo Association has complete discretion on who receives the highest of honors and are fully within their right to deny someone for no other reason that they don’t want him to be yokozuna…and everyone in Japan involved in sumo knows this. They may not like it, but they understand the reality.

So Jesse and Jessica won. Like, duh. Given their overall strong results and ability to handle any challenge fearlessly, this was no surprise. Look, Tina and Aivan were game, but they had a limited repertoire in a contest that demands versatility, and they never had the look of a champion. I’m totally convinced that they would’ve been done after the last team challenge if their side didn’t win immunity. For the entire homestretch it looked like they were in a constant battle for rock bottom plus one, and it just so happens that this is the worst place to be in the finale. I should also point out that Rachel and Julio survived at least one massive misstep not too long ago (undercooked scallops), so degree of difficulty certainly did matter.

Good season! There were some annoyances, such as excessive filler and too many team challenges (which seemed pointless in the first place in a season where every contestant was its own team), and I still don’t get the decision to ax an entire quarter of the field on day 2, but overall the pair dynamics worked great and this was an unpredictable, hard-fought contest from start to finish. Early favorites faltered, darkhorses found second winds, and no one could ever rest easily. And of course let’s not forget GRR and company, the smartest, savviest judges I have ever seen on any show (and thankfully free of the, ahem, demands of Hell’s Kitchen and Next Level Chef). So naturally a lot of furious viewers have decried this as the worst season ever and loudly announced that they’ll never watch another episode. Fine, whatever, don’t let the door hit your okole on the way out. I am going to continue enjoying the spectacle of amateur chefs working magic with ingredients and sweating it out in front of implacable but fair judges. Lots more fun than trying it myself, that’s for sure.

[DKW]

It’s that time again, where instead of two contestants who went the distance having their dreams shattered into a thousand pieces, it happens to nine of them! Which is somehow not a problem for anyone! (Least of all me! )

America’s Got Talent season 20 finale - NBC, 2 hours, 9/23/25

First off, one of the guiding principles I’ve had throughout my life: Credit where it’s due. Having caught glimpses of all four quarterfinals, I can confirm that this is the first season in ages, possibly ever, where no hideously unworthy or embarrassing contestant made it past prelims. No aimless bumbling poseur like Hans, no sickening enabled manbaby like Ben Lapidus, no disgusting slime like Ahren Belisle, no brazen hack like Tone The Chiefrocca, no fourth rate buffoon like Yumbo Dump, no ZERO TALENT BUM WHO THINKS FREAKING TALKING IS A VEGAS ACT like Brandon Leake. Every one of these forty contenders, at minimum, actually did something potentially worthwhile. I’m guessing that NBC is finally getting serious blowback for these horrific choices, or they looked at the news and decided that now is not the time to be celebrating gross incompetence. Whatever the reason, this is a positive development and they deserve credit for it. (Maybe not a ton of credit, but you can’t set the bar too high with reality TV.)

Jessica Sanchez (singing) - I still remember her stint on American Idol, where she finished last in a middle round but got rescued by the judges (the only such reprieve they were allowed that season), and she immediately caught fire and soared all the way to the final, a remarkable comeback I dubbed the “Sanchez Rebound”. This has happened a few times on AGT, in fact, so her presence here is strangely fitting. There is one crucial difference between now and then, however…she’s pregnant. Super big deal all season long. The song? What about it? Bombastic diva-ing, you know the drill. I’m not saying she’d be an unworthy winner, but she certainly wouldn’t be less unworthy than the other divaing divas who’ve won here.

Lightwire (theatrical light show) - Wow. Wowie-wowie-wow. This is almost indescribable. So grand and colorful and masterful and wonderful and breathtaking and…WOW. They dance, and they form animals and objects, and they blend in with the artwork, and they seemingly teleport from place to place, and, and…WOW! This was the only act the entire season where I watched all their performances start to finish, and I was bedazzled every time. I’d put this on par with Kristy Sellars, it is that good. From beginning to end I got the feel of not only a worthy Vegas act, but a team 100% dedicated to making one. This is miles and miles ahead of nearly everything else I’ve seen this season. I…I have to stop now before I set myself up for crushing disappointment.

Mama Duke (rap) - Geez. Overrated poetry recitation, except she takes out all the energy, flash and style. What’s the damn point??

Sirca Marea (couple acrobatics) - I said it before, just being really dangerous doesn’t make it entertaining. The level of technical skill was impressive, but there’s only so much two people can do with one platform and one bar, and even within the short timeframe of AGT the repetitiveness was obvious. Another effort that looks like part of a variety show, not a headliner.

Micah Palace (bilingual rap) - Look, kid, did you ever consider doing some songs in English and some songs in your native language? What, being understandable too much EFFORT or something? Overrated poetry recitation is overrated poetry recitation, and throwing in a dumb gimmick isn’t going to make it better.

Leo High School Choir - Every time I see one of these groups, I think the same thing: “Dang, there’s gotta be a better way to keep these boys away from drugs, crime, and violence then instilling belief in an invisible space fairy from a 2,000-year-old book of mythology.” Song was good, nothing to write home about.

Chris Turner (improv rap) - Three in one night?? I’m sorry, when did it become 1990 again?

Jourdan Blue (singing) - Oh sweet Gumi…a man doing a song originally sung by a woman is iffy enough, but one specifically from the perspective of a woman? (Seriously, it’s about empowerment and breaking free.) Doesn’t even have the right voice for that, for crying out loud.

Team Recycled (40-member dance with fans and light sticks) - Man, these guys are good. Not only because of their tremendous passion and energy, but their consummate precision. Fast to slow and back again, between the seats, coordinated leaps, formations, they are in complete control from start to finish, not a misstep or hiccup anywhere. On top of that, it’s just really cool to watch. One of the extremely few acts this season that looked like they came to win.

Steve Ray Ladson (country singing) - I was disappointed to learn that the banjo is just for looks. Not a big fan of this music to begin with, and it was way too monotone. You don’t have to be a belter, but you have to show some vocal range!

Noteworthy is that there was no comedian this season. In fact, I saw like two, total, and neither got a Golden Buzzer (which was the only realistic shot either had at making a deep run). It would seem that either the voters are raising their standards for humor or (more likely) the charismatic jokesters with big followings like Josh Blue aren’t bothering anymore. I don’t like how so many types of acts have been excised (Remember martial arts? Balancing? Classical instruments? Skating? Painting?), but I’d be lying if I said I miss the comedians.

Huh. Interesting situation here. So, there’s one heavily effects-based act that blew me away, one technically perfect physical act that I found a blast, and eight ranging from “left me completely flat and absolutely doesn’t deserve to win” to “pretty nice but absolutely doesn’t deserve to win”. So what exactly am I rooting for here? If either Lightwire or Team Recycled gets a very deserved win, that means the other gets a very undeserved bullet train to the face. It’d be like Kristy Sellars vs. The Mayyas all over again. If neither wins, both get equally hosed, which is honestly a better result (I know I use “Scylla and Charybdis” a lot, but if it fits, it fits, dangit! ), but then who should win then? The only one I’d be comfortable with is Lee High School Choir (assuming, of course, that they’re as wholesome as they present themselves as, which I have no reason to doubt), but how much chance do they have of beating out a pregnant diva and a hunk with a guitar? And then there’s the unavoidable issue of who even wants to be tied to Vegas with tourism in that city taking an absolute hammering lately.

Well, that’s season 20. Final results? If I feel like it.

[DKW]

Oh, what the heck, I already watched the episode, may as well close this out.

Also-rans: Mama Duke, Sirca Morea, Steve Ray Ladson, Micah Palace, Team Recycled. No surprise at any of these, including, sadly, Team Recycled. It’s how this show’s voting has always treated genuinely impressive acts, keep them around to the end to enjoy the spectacle, then discard them like torn Beanie Babies. I honestly can’t even get upset at this anymore, not even on the level of faintly lingering resentment, it’s become just one of the ways of this cruddy universe.

Oh, in addition to the Vegas deal and the cool mil, the winner gets a complimentary trip to Universal Orlando. Y’know, just in case you thought they weren’t twisting the knife into the other finallists enough.

5th - Lightwire. Why did I think this ever had a prayer? At any rate, these brilliant Brazilians accomplished what they set out to do, let America know who they are and open a lot of doors. I have the feeling we’ll be seeing them again real soon.

4th - Leo High School Choir. A valiant effort. Keep the faith.

3rd - Jourdan Blue. Thanks for playing; good luck getting a career going.

Which leaves Jessica Sanchez and…pfft, like there was any chance it wasn’t going to be Sanchez. It’s going to be hard building her singing career and raising a baby at the same time (there was a reason Celine Dion took that well-publicized hiatus), but if anyone can work it out, she can.

And to be honest, I’m not upset at Chris Turner getting the Spot of Eternal Suffering. I’m sure he’s a blast at parties, but I can’t ever see improv rap as anything but a funny gimmick. He’s about to learn just how popular he really is, a harsh lesson for some, but always vital. He does have a great attitude and isn’t at all resentful about getting oh so close, so I’m not worried about him landing on his feet.

And that’s the milestone season 20! Up next is…anyone’s guess!