I have a color-coded spreadsheet tracking my Christmas present buying progress.
[QUOTE=vivalostwages]
I do something a bit different with game shows: I scream at contestants : “HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW THAT?!”
I don’t know why they never listen to me when I shout out the answers.
[/QUOTE]
The funny part of this is when, a few years back, I went to a few tapings of The Price is Right (lived in LA, had a friend who really really wanted to get on the show, and he finally did, yay!) and was almost afraid to yell advice because what if they did hear me and I was wrong?
I will cuddle a friendly snake, be it a boa or python or whatever. I’m very small, so it better not be a huge snake unless there’s somebody else to help keep said snake from accidentally strangling me, but I like snakes.
Apparently because I walk up and down escalators instead of just standing there like a lobotomized gibbon. People tend to turn around and stare at me with a mixture of confusion and horror when I walk past them.
Many reasons:
Most of the Lego in the house is mine, not my kids’. There are many “daddy’s toys” that the kids aren’t allowed to play with.
I know more about Disneyland than any non-Disney-employee has a right to know.
I love medieval literature, history, art–Hell, anything medieval.
I take every Halloween off from work so that I have time to set up my garage haunt. Then I hang out and scare the piss out of the trick-or-treaters.
I’ve got enough Heroscape figures to choke a horse with.
My idea of a fun vacation is a 25 day long backpacking trip.
Gosh, too many to list but how about:
I painted my house hot pink.
I have shoes worth more than my car.
Related to that, I drive an almost 20 year old beater and don’t give a crap that it doesn’t look “professional”.
I don’t have any desire to get married and don’t mind not being in a relationship.
I collect (and display publicly) concrete dinosaur statues.
I enclosed a two car garage to make a playroom for my cats. My office is the former tool room. The eight cats and I are quite happy out here, thank you.
[QUOTE=koeeoaddi]
I like buttermilk.
[/QUOTE]
Loon!
Hmmm…
[del]I know that there isn’t really a vast conspiracy to remind me that I can’t fit in with “normal” society.[/del]
More in keeping with the OP
Because I can spend an hour (til The Monster gets bored) populating an imaginary cardboard castle.
Because I will sing Gilbert & Sullivan pieces sotto voce in places like the grocery store. Or Tom Lehrer.
Because I smile when I greet the bus driver.
[QUOTE=vivalostwages]
People think I’m nutty because:
…
–I like to drink tonic water by itself
[/quote]
Nothing wrong with that - I too like the zip of the quinine 
[QUOTE=vivalostwages]
–I like cold Brussels sprouts with nothing on them
[/quote]
- You lost me at ‘sprouts’
- You are nutty!
[QUOTE=olivesmarch4th]
…
Maybe it’s the joy I take in performing my amoeba impression? (blanket required, obviously.)
[/quote]
Put it up on YouTube! 
I amuse small children with my ant impression (place fists on forehead and wiggle two fingers ..)
Anyway I must be really weird to Americans.
I don’t have a car 
I don’t know how to drive :smack: :eek:
[QUOTE=Flutterby]
Cuz I have one of these hats and wear it happily in public (the scarfits).
[/QUOTE]
If it weren’t for the eyes, I’d get one.
[QUOTE=tremorviolet]
I collect (and display publicly) concrete dinosaur statues.
[/QUOTE]
You need to take them out to dinner next Friday the 13th!
Hm, how many of these things already mentioned do I do? I sing in the grocery and I like snakes (and cats! ).
The only time anyone has every pointedly told me I was weird was once with a group of girlfriends, I allowed that I was currently growing out my armpit hair just to see what it’s like.
“Only you, Ellen,” one of them said.
[QUOTE=Shagnasty]
Take a look at this. It has literally been giving me nightmares. I need to pass him on to someone else that appreciates him.
[/QUOTE]
Ahh, the tree man. I didn’t post in that thread because I didn’t want to seem insensitive. The poor guy has obviously suffered as a result of his affliction… but in a really strange way, all I feel is awe. It’s kind of like a miracle.
[QUOTE=Terrifel]
<checks profile> …damn! She’s married already.
If I can dissolve him with my own bodily secretions, will you go out with me?
[/QUOTE]
Sorry, mate. Once, when I implied that his hug would make me melt into a puddle, he told me he was going to scoop me into a container and wait until I resolidified so he could hug me all over again. We were meant to be.
[QUOTE=Czarcasm]
I am a moderator on the SDMB.
'Nuff said.
[/QUOTE]
I nominate Czarcasm for bull goose looney.
On second thought, being a mod for the SDMB more or less automatically makes you the bull goose looney, doesn’t it?
I desperately want to take you shopping with me. I need a minion.
$50K a year and all the virgins you can violate, but we have a dental plan. If you’re interested, send us a resume.
I want to marry him, and I’m not even gay. As far as anyone knows.
Regards,
Shodan
[QUOTE=Shodan]
I’m not even gay. As far as anyone knows.
Regards,
Shodan
[/QUOTE]
Perhaps the homosexual recruitment drive hasn’t reached your neighborhood yet. But I’m sure they have an 800 number, and would be willing to do some long-distance counseling and outreach.
[QUOTE=twickster]
If it weren’t for the eyes, I’d get one.
[/QUOTE]
Take off the eyes? (Though my inner child screams at the thought..)
I just love it, it’s very cozy.
I send my parents a What to Do if I Die letter regularly, to replace the last one. I thought it was quite practical until a friend said “Just when I think I know how weird you are, you say something like that.” 
[QUOTE=Sophistry and Illusion]
Perhaps the homosexual recruitment drive hasn’t reached your neighborhood yet. But I’m sure they have an 800 number, and would be willing to do some long-distance counseling and outreach.
[/QUOTE]
Outreach? Is that different from reach-around?
But I let a couple of nice-looking young men into my house a few months ago. I thought they might be Jehovah’s Witnesses, but they were too fashionably dressed, and instead of quoting the King James Bible to me, they kept telling me “this green shag carpet has got to go”.
It didn’t go anywhere, since I am not subscribing to any of those magazines, even if they get a toaster for it. Very pleasant people. They send me a lot of e-mail now offering to introduce me to their friend, Dirty Sanchez.
Regards,
Shodan
I’m kind of obsessed with all things German . . .
Actually, I tend to have a very obsessive personality, and talk endlessly about my current mental occupation (right now, it’s Argentinian women)
Gestalt
[QUOTE=Terrifel]
<checks profile> …damn! She’s married already.
If I can dissolve him with my own bodily secretions, will you go out with me?
[/QUOTE]
Back off, man! She gets to reject me first! :: snort :: paws ground ::
(Olives, you became one of my Hopeless Doper Crushes when you mentioned your amoeba impression. )
One of my favourite meals is “scrambled amoeba”: hamburger hash and mashed potatoes, all mixed together. I also like peanut butter on hot dogs.