One thing I find amazing about childbirth is how darn primitive it is. We have technology that transmits color photographs live from the surface of Mars, and THAT’S how we give birth? I’ve had 3 children. As soon as you give birth & you see your new baby it’s all worth it.
Curiously enough, I recall a case discussed in Professor Keith Simpson’s memoirs - could look up the details when I get home.
But, basically, it involved a man and his heavily pregnant wife-or-girlfriend waiting for a train … at some point, the wife-or-girlfriend excused herself, went to the ladies’, and returned, seven minutes later by the station clock, no longer pregnant.
Of course, she wasn’t doing anything more strenuous afterwards than travelling on British Rail … and Keith Simpson was a forensic pathologist, so, for the case to have come to his attention, it had to have ended badly … (His book, Forty Years of Murder, is an entertaining and informative read.)
The human body can do some pretty incredible things in the right circumstances. (This does not imply that it should be made to do incredible things on a regular basis. I am most emphatically not suggesting that maternity leave should be cut to seven minutes … )
Thanks guys. I will never give birth. I will stick to kittens.
I have three kids.
I had an cervical block with my first one and it hurt like hell. I was also scared because it was my first and I didn’t kow what to expect.
My second child was born 7 weeks early and came so quickly that there was no time for anything for the pain. It hurt so bad that thought I was truly going to die. In fact, due to some other complications, I almost did.
I was on a full epidural block with my last child and didn’t feel a thing. The nurse had to tell me that the reason I was getting tired and worn out was that my body was going through a lot of physical stress even though I couldn’t feel it happening. My labor room was full of family and friends, we watched the Brady Bunch on TV, played poker, and had a birthing party (they were all there at the birth as well).
Fact is, is that all births are completely different. I don’t think anyone is scaring the newbie with horror stories. It would be a disservice to tell her it is all rainbows and butterflies with just a few cramps and have her think something is horribly wrong when it hurts more than she expected.
Or not.
It may be rainbows and butterflies, but who knows. Every birth is different. Ana is correct, this is GQ not IMHO.
I am not a mother, a doctor or a baby, but wouldn’t it somehow be categorized as a disability because of the mother’s inability to be separated from the baby for any length of time if she’s breast feeding?
let’s pretend her ass feels great and she’s ready to work. If she’s breast feeding, doesnt’ she need to be with the baby like every two hours? And don’t her breasts hurt if she’s not?
in the frist 6 weeks, bf’ing is only being established so you generally need pretty close constant contact between mother and baby. Of course now everyone will tell me about women who pumped and were dedicated 
but in general for successful breastfeeding, you need physical access.
But, jar, I don’t think bf’ing is valued enough that women are given 6 weeks off to establish a bf’ing relationship. Breasts do hurt if you don’t feed the baby – hell sometimes they hurt even when you do!