In the spirit of MPSIMS…
My dad had a 1974 Toyota pick-up, which I destroyed (along with my knees) in a head-on collision. When I happened upon an original owner’s manual on eBay, I couldn’t resist. I noticed a few typographical errors in it, but there is one that makes grammatical sense rather than just being a misspelling:
“Remove thy dipstick and check for proper level.” [bolding mine.]
Godzilla’s bones! These guys are serious about oil changes! It sounds like a Commandment! I also like the section about how to use the Holy Hand Grenade. (Oh, wait. That was in a movie…)
“And the Lord spaketh 'Thy dipstick shall speak that your crankcase is FULL. Thy dipstick shall not say that the crankcase is LOW. Thy dipstick shall not say more than FULL, and no telling of thy dipsick is right out. Replace thy dipstick and drive forever and ever, amen.”
Myne Dipstick runneth over…
“And Saul DID remove his dipstick, and Lo! the dipstick revealed unto him that his crankcase was FULL.”
“And Saul did say, ‘O LORD, verily did I add OIL a week and a day ago, and the oil has lasted for EIGHT days!’”
No. It was just the only thing biblical I could think of that had to do with oil. [shrug]
Thus sayeth the Lord: All thy dipstick are belong to us!
Sorry , it had to be said. 
And here I was expecting a thread about fundamentalist birth control.
Okay, I’ll play.
“And whomsoever shall believeith his dipstick, shall not perish from the Earth, but shall have everlasting motor function.”
So if i showed up and just posted “Yea! This rocks! It made me laugh heartily!” on several threads,
I’d be written off, right?
Just checking.
YAY for dipstick humor!
Not that this is a “What kind of biblical quote can you make from a dipstick” thread (actually, I thought it would be a “funny typo” thread)…
“And the MEN of SODOM didst anoint their dipsticks with oil and PLUNGE their dipsticks into the crankcases of their brethren. And GOD spake unto them saying Remove thy dipstick, lest I smite thee with mine ROD.”
“But the MEN of SODOM were wicked and did not remove their dipsticks as commanded by GOD. And GOD did smite them with his ROD, and it was GOOD.”
(No, Mercutio, this doesn’t mean I’m gay!)