I got to thinking about this the other day, when I turned down an invitation from my office colleagues to participate in an office pool buying tickets for the big lottery jackpot (I didn’t have $10 in cash on hand, and wasn’t inclined to borrow). Now I like these guys and would be happy to see them all strike it rich. But at the same time, if they did win and I knew that I had blown the opportunity to win that much money, I would have been tortured about it. So even though I was not going to win anyway, some part of me was glad when these guys did not win either, selfish as that may be.
On a smaller level I’ve encountered the same type of feeling after purchasing something and then encountering another place where that item is for sale. I find myself sort of hoping that the price I’m about to see is higher than what I just paid, or the deal otherwise not as worthwhile. Though here too, logically it should make no difference, because I’ve already committed to what I’ve done and whatever the new deal is won’t make any difference to me. But there it is.
No, it is. You’re happy that they had the misfortune of not winning. Just because the misfortune is small doesn’t mean that’s not what you are happy about.
Another way of looking at it would be to call it sour grapes–although that would be more apt if they’d won.
The OP is not celebrating their misery though. His good feeling comes from avoiding his own bad feelings that would have happened if they won. Schadenfreude is about reveling in other people’s bad feelings, whereas this is just about his own feelings.
I just watched North by Northwest; in the auction house scene, I kept wanting Cary Grant to bid against James Mason’s character, just to run the price up on the one thing that Mason was there to win. Sadly, that’s not how it turned out.
Kind of like when I sell a stock. The next day I want it go down through the floor*. That means I sold it at a good time. I knew it was going down and all those suckers didn’t.
That was actually another example I had. I actually have, in addition to a saved link on my Favorites which captures my current stock portfolio, another link which contains all my previously owned stocks. I don’t check that one nearly so often, but every once in a while …
And it’s not even a reflection on my cleverness either. My father does all my stock picking anyway. But I’d rather feel that the result of that sale was a positive one rather than a huge missed opportunity.