Royal sex tape blackmail

In My Humble Opinion
1

From CNN:

Oh, dear, as Her Majesty might say.

List of Royal Suspects.

Was it Colonel Mustard in the library with a candlestick?

2

Well considering that Prince Harry has practically admitted to being a whore, I have no doubt it’s him.

3

Also rumoured to be hoovering up a fat line of gack, too.

My usual gossipy newsletters are letting me down, here, sadly. The writers must be too afraid of having a mysterious car crash in a tunnel, no doubt.

I’d imagine it’s one of the younger ones? You never know, though.

4

Harry’s certainly enough of a pillock to have somebody film it without thinking ‘oh, this might not be such a good idea’. Remember the Nazi uniform?

5

[QUOTE=jjimm]
Also rumoured to be hoovering up a fat line of gack, too.
[/QUOTE]
Translate into American English?

6

It’s apparently not a high-profile member of the family, according to 5Live news. Viscount Linley? Peter Philips? Freddie Windsor? I’m betting on the last one.

7

[QUOTE=Walloon]
Translate into American English?
[/QUOTE]
Snorting cocaine.

8

Wait, where is Colonel Mustard putting that candlestick?

9

[QUOTE=Struan]
It’s apparently not a high-profile member of the family, according to 5Live news. Viscount Linley? Peter Philips? Freddie Windsor? I’m betting on the last one.
[/QUOTE]

I wonder what counts as ‘not high-profile’. Even Eugenie is 17 now…

10

[QUOTE=GorillaMan]
I wonder what counts as ‘not high-profile’. Even Eugenie is 17 now…
[/QUOTE]

Ah, I had assumed the royal person was the blow-ee.

11

Anyone on this list engage anyone’s tittilation gland?

Not I.

12

[QUOTE=jjimm]
Anyone on this list engage anyone’s tittilation gland?

Not I.
[/QUOTE]

Methinks somebody was having a bit of fun finding some godawful photos. Can’t blame them. Zara Phillips can look alright, when the horsey teeth aren’t dominating her face…

13

[QUOTE=Struan]
It’s apparently not a high-profile member of the family, according to 5Live news. Viscount Linley? Peter Philips? Freddie Windsor? I’m betting on the last one.
[/QUOTE]

Doesn’t Lord Frederick prefer the company of gentlemen? :wink:

14

Sarah Ferguson and daughters are the lookers in the family.

15

[QUOTE=Walloon]
Sarah Ferguson and daughters are the lookers in the family.
[/QUOTE]
Bottom of barrel, meet scraper.

16

[QUOTE=Walloon]
From CNN:
Oh, dear, as Her Majesty might say.

List of Royal Suspects.

Was it Colonel Mustard in the library with a candlestick?
[/QUOTE]
Well, obviously if it had to do with fellatio, there was candlestick involved.

17

[QUOTE=Walloon]
Translate into American English?
[/QUOTE]

I’m guessing on this side of the pond we call it “blow”, since we do use the term “hoover”. I’m hoping it’s Beatrice, she’s quite the looker!

18

[QUOTE=Walloon]
Sarah Ferguson and daughters are the lookers in the family.
[/QUOTE]

I don’t know about her daughters but Fergie? Face like a horse and a bray like an ass. And an ass like a …

19

[QUOTE=Walloon]

List of Royal Suspects.
[/QUOTE]

On the learning something new front, I didn’t realize that Philip is only 476 heartbeats away from sitting on the throne himself. That’s quite some list.

20

[QUOTE=PastAllReason]
On the learning something new front, I didn’t realize that Philip is only 476 heartbeats away from sitting on the throne himself. That’s quite some list.
[/QUOTE]

Actually it’s not at all unusal for the royal consort to be in line for the throne given all the [del]incest[/del] interbreeding customary among royal families.