Identifying those things is step one. This is the hard part–once you’ve identified them as not serving you, cutting them out is easy, though often not simple nor fast.
I’ve cut out a lot of my life that was not serving me: I was working three jobs (same employer), which I cut down to two and then to one and finally to none, and I had a few friendships on life support for a long time, which I gradually cut out of my life, and I wasn’t happy living in the part of the country I lived in (and was born and raised in) so I moved 1000 miles away, and several other major things in the past five years. Once I had identified them as toxic, I knew what to do, but I’d been so used to having them that it me a while to realize I needed to get rid of them. Much happier now. Much. Poorer but much happier.
The late, great, Bob Pease had a column about messy desks (he was for them) where he told about a colleague who was meticulously throwing out stuff on his desk because he liked to minimize.
Pease: “Your wife must be nervous.”
Colleague: “It’s my third wife.”
Some people thrive on nothing. I revel in stuff. I may never read some of my books again, but I’m happy to have them, and you never know.
If this was Nora Ephron, I bet I had a happier middle age than she did. Not as rich or famous, but I didn’t have to write a book about my cheating spouse.
I bought a comic book the other day, and the clerk grimaced when I rolled it up. I said “Oh, I’m not a collector. But I was happiest as a kid when I bought a comic book… for 12¢,… rolled it up and stuck it in the back pocket of my cutoffs, got on my bike, rode past the 7-11 for a Coke Slurpee, then down to the lake to sip and read.”
He said “I notice you’re on your bike, and there is a 7-11 right on the way to the lake…”
As a collector, this is why I buy two copies. Preferably with two different covers. One for reading and spilling things on and one that goes in the vault. Though I don’t really collect anymore. The only thing currently is Keanu Reeves comic BRZRKR. Which after looking that up I see issue 4 is out now. Off to the store.