Same bat time, same bat channel

I understand and appreciate that bats hold a unique and necessary place in our ecosystem. I even am aware that some people purchase bat houses to encourage them to take up residence near their homes.

Note the term ‘near’ their home and notice, also that it is distinctly different from ‘in’ their home.

In 1987, I had just moved into a new house with my son (then age 3). In an older neighborhood, my room (upstairs) had slopping ceiling and windows that went from the floor to the ceiling. No built in screens, so I used those little slide-to fit things. Life was good.

One morning, shortly after our move (but long enough that I’d put stuff up on the walls), I got up and went to the bathroom. Although I wear thick glasses as a rule ('cause I’m blind as a, well, you know), I typically didn’t put them on until after I was dressed (cause even I could find the toilet, shower etc w/o much problem).

So, I’m sittin’ there, eyes all blurry kind of looking around my bathroom, say. What’s that brown splotch on the wall? So, I head on over (I can almost hear y’all saying “no, go back!!! don’t go near it!!!”) Did I mention that my eyesight isn’t very good? That will explain why it wasn’t until my nose was about 5 inches away from the brown splotch on the wall before I noticed that it was a bat.

I hurriedly called a friend of mine who’d had experiences with them (I remember having laughed at her stories). She told me to get a broom and ‘just hit it, it’ll be stunned and you can sweep it into a container and toss it outside’.

Perhaps I should have checked which kind of bat was hanging in the bathroom, 'cause clearly as later events showed, it wasn’t the ‘easystun’ variety. It was Arnold Schwartzenbat. I’m swinging at it, it’s swooping around, I’m making noises that, well, usually are good noises if ya catch my drift, but are just a tad, um higher? swoop/whimper/swoop/whimper.

Into this mix I hear my son knocking at the bathroom door. “What’s the matter mommy?” “ummmm[sub][sup]whimper whimper[/sub][/sup] nothing honey, I’m just [sub][sup]whimper whimper[/sub][/sup] trying to catch umm [sub][sup]whimper whimper[/sub][/sup] a really big bug [sub][sup]whimper whimper[/sub][/sup]”

“I gotta go potty mommy”. Well, mother love being what it is, I manage finally to knock Schwartzenbat to the floor and cover it with a pail (Ben had left in the tub), slid a piece of cardboard under it, and slid the whole shebang over to the window, where I shoved it out with a flourish.

I determined that the most likely entry point was the windows with screens, and subsequently stuffed towels in the gaps between the two panes.

Apparently, tho’, Schwartzenbat had friends. Over the years I developed a position on bats. That position is: prone, face down on the floor, preferably with a blanket over my head, whimpering. I do it rather well, according to the critics. I’d have my son call my SO “hey, Enzo, there’s a bat flying around, would you come get rid of it for us?”. So, he’d come over, see my son sitting on the couch, “where’s your mom?” Ben would point over to the floor. “Oh”. Four or five more times real life flying creatures in the house.

Now, I’ve dealt with rodents, possums, raccoons etc. They all have the good sense to hie themselves away from humans. I **like ** that in a wild creature. These damn things keep on swooping around.

Enzo, of course, has never played on my fear of bats. Nope. Well, except for hanging the paper honeycombed bat in my kitchen. And putting the inflatable bat on my pillow on the bed. And, the time he put about 50 little rubbery bats under the visor on the passenger side of his truck then asked me to lower the visor**.

So, I finally moved out to the country. Where the bats know enough to stay outdoors where I can pretend they don’t exist. And I thought I was done.

One night around 2 am, the phone rang. It was the alarm company, letting me know that the motion detector went off at work. So, I get dressed, drive the 20 miles into town, meet up with the cop who has determined that there’s been no entry into the buidling. So, we shrug it off, I go home.

One year later. Same thing, call about the motion detector. I come to town, cop says "well, I saw a bat flying around in there. So here we are again. When daylight arrived, my employee got to locate and deal with said flying furry thing.

So. In summation: When I’m being battered by life, battling the forces of evil, I’d batter not catch anyone unbattering my hatches to let in any nocturnal flying mammals of the corder Chiorptera, with or w/o the membanous wings. I’ll hit you with my baton, I will.

**Yes, I have gotten back at him for this. Lots of times

My parents built an addition to our house when I was but a little mag-let. One summer night, after putting me to bed in my crib, they were watching TV when they heard me babbling “Nice kitty nice kitty nice kitty” or some such. The babbling went on even longer than my usual babbling, so they decided to check it out. They found me talking away to a small bat that was hanging upside down from my crib-rails. It had gotten in through the parts of the house that weren’t quite sealed off yet.

Could this be a sign that I’m some sort of superhero? Do I have latent bat powers?

Well, not that you need anything more to alarm you, but ISTR that bats carry a strain of rabies that can be transmitted just by contact. Consider yourself lucky.

If this is just an urban legend, I’m sure I’ll be corrected shortly.

wring: well, I suppose ya had to know that someone with a bat attitude would post to this, and, yep here ya go.

I really admire bats, and have since my dad took me into some odd caves of Mexico as a child to watch them. I’m no expert, but, some of the things I admire are : they’re the only mammal who has evolved to truly fly, they devour myriads of the insects that plague us every night, and female bats can nurse on the wing :eek:, Wow!

I can understand them being on the creepy scale to most folks. And they are a rabies vector, so you should never handle one. But, in my experience, when they are disabled and without flight, they seem quite fragile, crawling and attempting to sound their amazing clicking sonar, that I can’t help to be their advocate.

Some good links are:, ,and

From what I see of you here, wring, your good mind encompasses the greater scope of others. Here’s hoping that with some more understanding, flighty bats can be corralled into the same good graciousness.

After the flaming golf ball escapade earlier this summer my younger cousins and I were out on the front porch of their parents house drinking beer and shooting the breeze when we saw, through the front window, a bat swooping around the living room. My big macho cousins immediately went into male-mode:

“Dude! Where’re the tennis rackets!!”

“What?? You’re going to kill the bat?!?!”

“Hell, yeah!!”

“Noooooooooo! Bats eat mosquitoes. Anything that eats mosquitoes is a friend!!”

We talked about bats for a while then moved on to other stuff then forgot about it.

An hour or so later we got stuck on a point of conversation and went into their computer room to look something up online.

“Wonder where the bat went?” said one of the boys.

“Look up,” said I.

And hanging up towards the ceiling on a bit of molding was the bat.

They flipped, of course.

“Shut UP!! Do you want to wake him?” I hissed.

“Well, what are YOU going to do about it?”

“Go get me a pair of gloves.”

They brought me a pair of gloves. I stepped up on a chair, quickly grabbed the bat off the wall, showed them the evil horrid creature fit into the palm of my hand and had teeth maybe a quarter inch long (if you’re being generous), and carried him outside.

Have been their hero ever since :smiley:

Their father used to be a cop in Stevens Point, WI. He (and his roommate) both hated bats, so my cousins came by it genetically. Cops were issued service revolvers. And bats, according to Denny, make GREAT target practice after a couple of beers. I suppose if they had been target shooting outside they may have gotten their security deposit back on that house… :stuck_out_tongue:

I love bats. I think they are cute. I think they are misunderstood and truly one of God’s gifts to man.

Granted, I don’t want them in my house, but I’m planning on building a bat box this winter in hopes of getting a small colony to help eliminate the swarms of mosquitos I have around my house.

Bats = good.

I’d advise you to steer clear, mag. You could be close to violating several major copyrights. :slight_smile:

I just love bats. Your average bat is neither blind nor
dangerous. I’m upset that you people have bats in your house and I don’t. I may have bats in my belfry, but not in the literal sense.

 According to Bat Conservation International, you are more likely to contract rabies from a cow than from a bat. Bats do consume massive amounts of insects. Personally, I find most species cute. They are just victims of bad press. Bats do not want to get tangled in your hair. They do not attack humans. Only two species drink blood. Bats are actually affectionate and cooperative. Groups huddle together for warmth, and protection as well as emotional comfort. Bats show affection by groooming each other with their tongues. Chimps and especially dogs exhibit similar behavior. Bats hunt and eat prey to regurgitate to injured roostmembers who are unable to fend for themselves. Its stomach churning and heart warming at the same time. That said, bats are wild animals. They should be handled with caution. Chique was correct in wearing gloves. While the bat would likely not bite, it could have. There's also the risk of finding that a bat in the hand will empty it bladder and bowels.

  Many species of bats are endangered or protected. It is thus illegal to kill or harm them. Wring, I applaud you for taking the time and effort to evict the bat without harming it. Chique, your show of understanding and kindness is laudable as well, but Wring overcame fear and revulsion to do what she did. I urge anyone with unwanted bat residents to do a little research. They can be evicted cheaply, and without hurting them.

The thought of cops shooting at animals for fun nauseates me. Hunting is a GD issue, but shooting at animal that is harmless, without any intention of eating it or taking a trophy is sick. The fact that these cops would use firearms while under the influence of alcohol does not fill me with confidence either.

Vacuum cleaners.

My mother has bats in her bel—I mean, apartment, from time to time. Last time, she called the maintenance man, who sucked up said bat into a vacuum cleaner, took it outside and set it loose; Mom says the bat flew off, seemingly unharmed (and dust-free!).

Ya know, as a card carrying city gal, I feel that I’ve come quite a ways. I’ve gone from the inhuman shriek at seeing some rodent dash past, to being able to dispose of the, well, what’s left, after the cat has dealt with it. I’ve gone from cringing at even coming into the room if I thought a varmit was in there to merely a lifted eyebrow. When the rat was hanging around the kitchen, I wouldn’t go in there w/o escort, but now, shrug.

And, I truly do understand that the world is better off with bats in them. I remain steadfast in my conviction that my house and my office are far better off without them. I also understand they’re not trying to get in my hair, the relative likelihood of rabies etc. I still don’t like 'me up close. Not all that fond of seeing them outdoors, either, but then I can usually convince myself they’re birds not bats.

Cute? only with my eyes tightly shut, thank you. I am, however, taking names for the next time I need to be rescued from a bat. :smiley:

You’ve got my number - my fee is quite minor! :smiley:

Found this on CBC this morning: Bird-eating bats.

In case the link doesn’t work (or maybe it’s just my computer acting up again):

Although I do question his statement on nocturnal predators - there are several large species of owls in Europe that could easily tackle migrating birds.

Bats are great! My sister found one on the windowledge outside her office - the staff and the senator were somewhat amused when they found she had named it after the mayor of the city (they did bear a resemblance to each other - I’ve seen her side-by-side photos).

Side note - Please seriously consider getting a bat house, especially if you have lots of flowering plants and trees in the area (pollination and eating the insects attacking the plants). Set up their house away from your house, and they’ll have a place to stay while keeping out of your house (make sure your house is totally empty of bats before plugging up any access areas - few things are worse than a decomposing bat in the attic).

I did that with a frog once…couldn’t figure out what the hell it was (due to weird lighting) until I was right up next to it. Then it jumped and scared the hell out of me!


In my whole life, I’ve seen 2 bats outside of zoos!
I have a field guide. I live in the right kind of area.
And I’ve seen 2 bats! And one of those was hibernating! Meanwhile, the rest of you seem to be up to your elbows in bats! I’m gonna go pout now.

I had almost forgotten but I was attacked by a bat once. It just flew into myface as I went out a doorway and flapped around a bit. It had been up all night so I was really tired and the attack left me disoriented but no worse for the wear. Since then I’ve been ambivilent about fuzzy, leathery things on my face :smiley: