I am a flashlight, steady-beamed, illuminating.
I am a leaky battery, releasing acid, contaminating.
I am a base, neutralizing, producing water and salt.
I am CATS. All your base are belong to me.
I am catnip: tasty but with unpredictable results.
I am the rock in the box: I burning your dog.
I am an Herbalist, brewing and bubbling.
I am a cheap-ass cauldron, rusting and leaking.
I am June Carter Cash risen from the dead and picking up the herbs.
I am a Rasta, zombie-dispatching, herb-smoking.
I am Haile Selassie telling you to do my bidding.
I am The Hulk, only deaf and mute.
I am Bruce Banner’s pants, tear-defying, Hulk-containing (and censor-pleasing!)
I am the Marvel Ultimates Universe, pants-shedding, censor-defying.
I am a rivet, jean reinforcing, building building
I am Bender, please insert girder, (taker off of pants, wrecker of buildings)
I am a virus, hardware crashing, data destroying.
I am an anti-retroviral medication, nausea inducing, life prolonging
Medication against a computer virus?
Anyway…
I am allergy, medication intolerant, anaphylactic shock causing
I am a steroid, inflammation quelling, breath-saving
I am an itch in the middle of your back, chronic, steroid-resistant.