This has been bugging me all day, so I am gonna trust my intuition that this is the right thing to do. TN*hippie, I love you too. I read about all you are going thru, and I wanted to respond to that – but nothing I wanted to say fit in with the tenor of that thread. I thought about a private email, but that didn’t seem right somehow. I want to say that I have always enjoyed seeing your name on a post. I missed you while you were gone. Some of your posts recently made me wonder if there was something going on, but I didn’t feel like I could ask. I am sorry to find that I was right, and that you are paying such a price. (Which is not to be taken in any way as approving of drunk driving.)
The thing is – I’ve been realizing for a while that no one here really knows me that well. I post now and then, I have met some people, but I more often choose not to reveal myself. I think it’s time 
So I am going to share some of the things going on with me, attempting to give a more well rounded picture of the Alpha Redhead. TN*Hippie, if you find any of these things interesting, it would be my pleasure to correspond with you… I can even do snail mail if your internet access is curtailed. I am also open to anyone else who finds the subjects interesting. This list is not organized in any way, so take from it what you choose.
A/S/L, as they say. I am 43, happily female and located in San Francisco. I live on Nob Hill, which has good and bad points. Sounds great, but “the little cable cars” can become quite a nuisance when they are going by full of shrieking tourists at midnight. Overall, the good outweighs the bad –I have the most amazing view from the roof, can easily get most anywhere I like and I have been here long enough that my rent is still reasonable (for SF). OTHO, I plan to move in the next year or so. It’s time for me to own something, and that will involve leaving the city. I want a yard, room for plants, room to put all my stuff away and a place to entertain. I want a home, something I have never really had – and I have decided to make one for myself if no one else wants to play.
I don’t currently know if there will be anyone else. I have a man I love very much, but we are going thru something that I can’t quite define. He moved out the beginning of the year, but we still see each other all the time. There are issues that I won’t list here, but we are at a crossroads. He has a lot going on himself, but I can’t wait much longer for him to decide what he wants. It hurts terribly to accept that it may mean the relationship is over – this was my fairy-tale, the dream I never really believed I could live. But, I am an adult, and I have accepted that the choice is in his hands, even if I am the one who insists he choose.
Lighter stuff: red hair (natural, but I now cover the gray), green eyes, and 100% Irish extraction. My parents were both immigrants, who met here in SF. I have 75 first cousins, last time I counted – Ireland, Scotland, Denmark, Boston, New York and who knows? I am the oldest of six; two sisters and three brothers… two nieces and three nephews. No children for me. Never got to it with my ex, and now it wont happen. I am okay with that, surprisingly in some ways. No pets – an apartment is no place for a dog, and I am allergic to cats.
Thousands of books! I have at least 1000 in the place right now, and 10-12 boxes in storage. Been a book junky since I can recall – I don’t remember NOT being able to read. Currently working on G.K Chesterson (recommended by Uke), a book on Celtic religion and magic, rereading “The Televisonary Oracle” (which I recommend to everyone). Also reading Anthony Robbins, just to see what all the hubbub is about… very interesting. Music? Wildly diverse… or psychotic (as someone who looked thru my collection once said). Tonight has included Bruce Springsteen, Bob Segar, Van Morrison, Leonard Cohen, Robert Earle Keen, Allman Bros., Bob Marley, Joan Baez, Bob Dylan, Eagles (yes, TN I recall that you hate them!) and Tom Waits.
My current challenges include learning how to live alone, how to make new friends and some self-esteem issues. Since I reduced my drinking a year or so back, it’s harder to know what to do with myself. I still drink, but rarely – and I have found out that I don’t know many people outside of bars. Adults don’t have as many places to make friends, and I have been somewhat reclusive lately. I am working on losing weight, and until I get a grasp on that, it’s hard to go out and meet people. I can remember how to be sassy and sexy, but I have a hard time doing these days. I determined to recover that portion of myself! I have been treated for depression, and I think I have a good handle on that these days – I feel better, that’s for sure. I am glad to have recovered some of myself, and I am on a mission to get back the rest. Got some new theme songs – “Get Over It” is playing now, and I always return to the classic “Ain’t Necessarily So”. Having been named in Chicago the Alpha Redhead, I have added Springsteens “RedHeaded Woman”. Those who ignored me in all those “crush” threads, take note! NeoPagan Pantheistic Celtic Discordian Scorpio. visualize sassy grin and wink
Long enough. Thank you for your attention. Come see me in SF – there’s a comfy couch and lots to see!