As some of you may know, Canada’s western-most provinces of Alberta and British Columbia are/had been engulfed in the worst forest fires the region has seen in over a century. The fire raging in the Crow’s-nest Pass is over 180 square kilometers and there is no rain in sight for at least 8 days. Apparently it was started by one lone cigarette from one careless idiot.
Consider this: The situation is desperate.
One tactic that has been used effectively in the past is to race ahead of the fire and cut down about half a kilometer of tree line to deny the fire a source of fuel. Once it reaches the swath of clear-cut land, its progress is halted. Since it cannot go burn in reverse, it is easy to snuff it out or douse it from above.
Good idea right? Well not in the minds of a few invasive protesters.
Upon hearing of the cutting of the tree line in the Crow’s-nest pass, a group of protesters chained themselves to the forest to prevent what they called “the unnecessary rape of BC’s natural landscape”. Not only have they chained themselves to the tree line, they have also “spiked” a few trees in the process. This is a common practice of eco-terrorists in which a railroad spike is hammered into a random tree.
Any chainsaw or mechanical device that attempts to cut down said tree will shatter or break, possibly maiming or killing the person wielding the device. And there they are, chanting, eating granola and shitting into their Depends from a standing position to the tunes of Jewel, Burning Man and Phish as the flames creep closer and closer.
It’s no secret that I HATE protesters of all kinds and breeds. But these ones are different. Try as I might, I can’t hate them. In fact, they humor me. Their misguided and unbelievable stupidity has actually driven me to hysterics.
Maybe they will be eaten alive by the animals that will no doubt come rampaging out of the blazing inferno leaving tattered shreds of idiocy hanging from bloodied chains. Either that or I can watch their unwashed, pot-reeking asses light up like Roman candles on the 6’clock news.
I know that the average human is a mindless ignorant mongrel. But really, are some people actually THAT dumb?
Ah well, I guess as nature burns and devastates, she also cleans up the shit in the process.