Save your money, people: Disney's 'Dinosaurs' reeks...

Now out on video (and, God help me, presently running on our VCR). Geez, they don’t miss a single cliche. It’s a hopeless mishmash of Tarzan and Jungle Book and Lion King and Land Before Time (which I know wasn’t Disney, but that doesn’t seem to have stopped them) and, I dunno, every single movie ever made where somebody made the speech during the second reel that goes, “Wait! If we all stand together…”

And every single movie ever made that clubbed you over the head with a moral about “getting to know other kinds of people” and “don’t judge a book by its cover”, and finished up with a pious, “our journey’s just begun”…

Gag me with a spoon.

Rent it only if you have a 3-year-old who needs sedating.

An addled 3-year-old.

P.S. Bonzo’s official movie review, delivered just now from the depths of the living room couch: "That movie sucked."

Aww. Who’s Bonzo, though? I must ask.

C’mon, DDG – what else did you expect from a Disney movie?

I liked “Dinosaurs” because of the special effects. That’s it. I expected nothing more, and got the same. “Talking” dinosaurs? A journey to a haven, where they can continue to breed like crazy, despite the environment for them about to go “boom”?

Sorry you and the kids were disappointed, though. And, yeah – who’s Bonzo?

I figure the DVD will have some great extras, and the effects will come through clear and sharp - very impressive.

Having said that, I avoided seeing it in a theatre as a) it’d be filled with restless kids, and b) the reviews panned it.

I thought it’d be a cool movie when I first saw the previews. Then I found out that the dinosaurs talked.

:frowning:

I watched it in theater. I think if I saw it at home, I would do so with the sound off.
Pity that the DVD doesn’t have channels, so I could turn off, say, voice while leaving sound effects and music active.

I saw it a few nights ago on the campus movie channel. Blargh. Though I must say that I was comforted by the knowledge that the characters and all of their kind would eventually die horrible deaths and torment the planet no more.

New theory: Glurge killed the dinosaurs! Discuss.

I could tell that from the previews…(insert barfing smiley)

Indeed. The first 5 min trailer promised something grand, even epic. Then, I saw the looooove monkey…sigh.

Cheers,
Hodge

I have a three year old that loves it. Actually, my 7 and 10 year old enjoyed it as well. I thought it was ok, although it seemed like a live action Land Before Time movie. The first preview I saw for it didn’t have the talking dinosaurs, so I thought it would be better than it was, but overall, it sure beats watching Blue’s Clues all day.

I saw this for the first time yesterday, and I bitched through the whole thing. Damn was it awful!!! I could not believe my brother (28) liked it so much. I thought it was garbage. Everything in that movie had been done before. It was terrible!!

Was that the one with the stupid talking/singing/dancing butt-ugly lemurs?
I’ve had nightmares about those things.

Yup, it’s the one with the lemurs.

I agree the plot was cliché ridden and cheesy, but hey… my son is 5 and loves dinosaurs. We saw it in the theater twice, and we’ll buy the DVD.

Its a kids movie people… as in for KIDS!

My brother has twin boys, they are three, and fairly addled as well… they are getting it.

I thought the special effects were cool, and the story wasnt any lamer than Road to Eldorado, or the Emperor’s New Groove.

Hey its Disney - valium for kids.

Mmmmmmmm…valium…

Just a clarification…the movie is “Dinosaur”. “Dinosaurs” was a (in my mind) pretty funny TV series.

Posting this link may be a bit self-serving, but at least I didn’t write it:

[ur]http://www.mouseplanet.com/jim/jun2300.htm.

A three-part series on what went wrong with this movie.

As for me, I haven’t seen it yet, but “its a kid’s movie” doesn’t really fly with Disney movies. Disney expects each of their major animated efforts to make $150 million, domestic box office. You don’t do that by pleasing only the 5-year-olds.

That said, word on two (Lilo & Stitch and Treasure Planet) of the next four (those two plus Atlantis and Monsters, Inc.) is pretty darn good. Word is that the early stuff for Monsters, Inc. was not up to Pixar standards, but then neither were the early versions of the Toy Stories. We’ll see.

At least they aren’t musicals (and Lilo & Stitch is a completely original screenplay).

Bonzo is 13, male, and (we think) human.

And, yeah, come to think of it, doesn’t Disney own the rights to the TV series Dinosaurs? Wasn’t it a Jim Henson Production?

How typical, then, of the money-grubbing evil dwarves down at the Magic Kingdom Corporate, to give their likely-to-fail movie practically the same title as the well-received-and-doing-nicely-on-video TV series.

Not to mention the “big eye staring” cover art, which is easily confused with the Godzilla “big eye staring” cover art. If we can’t make money by making good movies, then we’ll make money by selling bad movies on video to people who pick them up by mistake.

It took Disney 15 years to get Dinosaur out the door. It had the name long before Dinosaurs was on TV.