Scotland's First Minister Nicola Sturgeon unexpectedly resigns {2023-02-15}

An update on this, as the wheels of justice have ground to a halt:

Peter Murrell is in jail this morning, beginning a 5 year 3 month sentence for embezzling c.£400,000 from the SNP, of which he was Chief Executive.

Over 12 years, he took advantage of tissue-thin financial controls to divert SNP funds towards buying himself a serious of lovely little treats. There is no particular rhyme or reason to the purchases, other than that they are all expensive luxuries. In sentencing, the judge remarked that there was no obvious reason behind this lengthy campaign of embezzlement - he was an already well paid man, he didn’t have debts to service, he didn’t even get much use out of the stuff.

The list of what he bought is genuinely ridiculous. At the top end, the £100K campervan mentioned above, and a Jag which he owned for a few months before selling again. But also just an Aladdin’s cave of loot.Some of it clearly high end luxury:

In May and June of 2017, he purchased two Bremont World Timer Alt 1 watches in white and black for £4,555.25 and £4,795 respectively.

A further £4,225 was spent on a Montblanc Starwalker World Time fountain pen in March of that year, one of a number of pens purchased for four-figure amounts.

Among those are a Montblanc meisterstück moon pearl – a modern version of the pen used by Roger Moore’s James Bond in the 1983 film Octopussy – and two special Beatles editions designed by the same company.

A £3,500 hand chased wine coaster in Britannia silver, designed by Edinburgh-based jewellers’ Hamilton and Inches was purchased a week before Christmas in 2017.

Meanwhile, in May 2021, Murrell spent £3,192 on a black tea set and vanity bureau designed by leather maker Frank Smythson – which holds a royal warrant to provide stationery for the Duke of Edinburgh.

A £2,495 jewellery box and two tote bags in navy and burgundy were purchased from the same firm for a total of £1,116.

Lalique salt and pepper grinders priced at £2,618.16 were bought in January 2020.

Some of it in the pursuit of the perfect cup of coffee:

The schedule of items includes a Miele CM 6300 machine on 24 November 2014, which cost £1,299.

Then on 1 February 2017 he used £1,865.75 of party money on a Jura bean to coffee machine.

And on 10 October 2018 he invested in a Jura Z8 fully automatic bean to cup coffee machine, which cost £2,595.

The schedule shows Murrell purchased Portuguese coffee beans on a number of occasions.

In May 2017 he spent £84.95 on five packs of gourmet beans and £123.91 on five packs of roasted beans.

But aside from the machines and coffee itself, there is an assortment of related paraphernalia.

A manual espresso maker was bought for £141.07 in February 2017.

In August 2017, £660.80 was spent on a Jura glass coffee cup warmer, six Jura espresso cups and a stainless steel milk pipe, which attaches to a coffee machine.

And a few months later, in November of that year, £354.70 was shelled out on an assortment of Le Creuset espresso and cappuccino mugs in the space of just four days.

But also just some random stuff:

A Karcher pressure washer (£469.95) to a Dyson V8 Cordless vacuum (£469.99).

DVD series of Sherlock Holmes (£26.97), The Killing (£60), and seasons 1-3 of Danish political drama Borgen (£51.75) - which Nicola Sturgeon publicly said she was a fan of - were also purchased.

Items of clothing bought included Berghaus jackets (£236.95 and £163.98 respectively), about a dozen Gant shirts, Timberland shoes (£100), and a men’s “slouch pouch onesie” (£75.55).

Helly Hansen was another favourite, with Murrell buying a number of items including a Sulphur Expedition Parka (£700).

Other assorted purchases included a Caran d’Ache pencil sharpener (£110), a PerfectDraft starter kit (£174) alongside kegs of Jupiler, Leffe and Stella Artois, a GoPro camera (£479), a Royal Mint Scottish silver unicorn coin (£795), and three Davek Savile umbrellas (£975).

At the other end of the scale, he bought two Neutrogena hand creams (£2.50) as part of a larger purchase, a bottle of Loctite super glue (£3.50), and curry sauce paste (£11.99).

Sturgeon’s line is that either she didn’t notice this stuff, or that it seemed to her like the sort of stuff they could afford. That’s not crazy - they were both on good salaries! the c.£400K over 12 years he pled guilty to is only c.£34K a year - he could have given him and his wife a bigger salary and made the same money perfectly legally! But it’s a lot of stuff to miss.

If you’re wondering, all he had to do to buy, say, £2600 worth of salt and pepper shakers with party money was to email a no-recipet claim for “event expenses” or somesuch nonsense and someone would put it throught the system on his say-so. When he was occasionally asked to use the automated accounts system like everyone else, he simply said he was having trouble logging on. This is a major political party! It’s accounts were audited! This is a level of financial control that would shame a local bridge club.

The SNP line is that they are the victims here, no inquiry into their processes or structures is necessary and they are more to be pitied than condemned. For rank and file members, surely this is true - donations were made in good faith for purposes other than letting Murrell enjoy a quality espresso between Ninendo DS games. For the board and exec committee that let him get away with this for over a decade, I find my sympathy restrained.

Apparently the RV had no more than delivery mileage on it. Never used it.

Murrell having cut a deal to plead guilty, there isn’t going to be an embarrassing trial, and all sorts of rocks won’t have to be turned over in public. Nothing to see here, move on.

Even Scotland’s corruption is of an unambitious kind, not like selling Obama’s senate seat or something.

He does seem to have had a compulsion to buy stuff that he didn’t or couldn’t ever use. In a way its kind of sad, and speaks to someone chasing some warped vision of fulfillment (If I buy one more coffee machone, I’ll be the kind of successful person who has a great coffee machine) which is particularly weird because by any measure he was successful. One of the most powerful people in Scotland!

The real problem as you say is that he was able to get away with this, which means its a real relief that this is the only scandal caused by lax cronyism at the heart of the SNP and there is nothing else to worry about.

If you can slip purchases through, but not direct embezzlement of money, then the trick is to use party funds to buy an e.g. GBP 50K caravan, not use it, then sell it for e.g. GBP 35K. It’s not efficient, but the money being wasted (e.g. 15K) isn’t yours anyhow.

Much like thieves fencing stolen goods, it’s tremendously economically inefficient, and relies entirely on the near-zero cost of acquisition of the goods for it to make economic sense for the thieves. And for the fences.

What’s a bit confusing to me is the lack of follow-through on selling the stuff that could be sold. I guess he didn’t have a trusted henchman and was himself too busy arranging more bogus purchases.

Yeah, the Jaguar did get sold on within a few months, but that seems to have been the only thing. Cynically, it was also the one thing Sturgeon cant claim not to have been aware of, seeing as it was parked in front of her house.

Worth mentioning that the fun bit of this whole downfall is that Murrell was caught by accident. The original query was about the SNP spending money solicited for a referendum campaign on other otherwise legitimate political purposes. Thats what generated the raid on the SNP premises and confiscation of accounting records etc. Which is what uncovered the personal embezzlement which otherwise was completely undetected amd would have remained so as long as it was only the SNP amd their tame auditors with access to the books.

The moral being, if you’re misappropriating funds for personal use, don’t start playing fast and loose with the public spending as well. Only be dishonest in one dimension!