This just showed up in my email!
DEAR AMERICAN:
I NEED TO ASK YOU TO SUPPORT AN URGENT SECRET BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP WITH A TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE.
I AM MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY OF THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA. MY COUNTRY HAS HAD CRISIS THAT HAS CAUSED THE NEED FOR LARGE TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF 800 BILLION DOLLARS US. IF YOU WOULD ASSIST ME IN THIS TRANSFER, IT WOULD BE MOST PROFITABLE TO YOU.
I AM WORKING WITH MR. PHIL GRAM, LOBBYIST FOR UBS, WHO WILL BE MY REPLACEMENT AS MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY IN JANUARY. AS A SENATOR, YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS THE LEADER OF THE AMERICAN BANKING DEREGULATION MOVEMENT IN THE 1990S. THIS TRANSACTIN IS 100% SAFE.
THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT URGENCY. WE NEED A BLANK CHECK. WE NEED THE FUNDS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. WE CANNOT DIRECTLY TRANSFER THESE FUNDS IN THE NAMES OF OUR CLOSE FRIENDS BECAUSE WE ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER SURVEILLANCE. MY FAMILY LAWYER ADVISED ME THAT I SHOULD LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON WHO WILL ACT AS A NEXT OF KIN SO THE FUNDS CAN BE TRANSFERRED.
PLEASE REPLY WITH ALL OF YOUR BANK ACCOUNT, IRA AND COLLEGE FUND ACCOUNT NUMBERS AND THOSE OF YOUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN TO WALLSTREETBAILOUT@TREASURY.GOV SO THAT WE MAY TRANSFER YOUR COMMISSION FOR THIS TRANSACTION. AFTER I RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION, I WILL RESPOND WITH DETAILED INFORMATION ABOUT SAFEGUARDS THAT WILL BE USED TO PROTECT THE FUNDS.
YOURS FAITHFULLY MINISTER OF TREASURY PAULSON
Whoohoo! $800 billion! I’m rich!
How nice is it that I’m going to hijack your thread so soon, but I just wanted to say…
Welcome Back, Tuckerfan !
Indian
September 24, 2008, 9:56am
3
Nigerians are immigrating to U.S now ! :smack:
Musicat
September 24, 2008, 11:56am
4
Unh…you do realize that your “commission” will be only a fraction of the $800 billion, don’t you? You may have to buy cheaper champagne.
Congratulations! Any thoughts on how you’re going to invest your FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE yet?
Tuckerfan:
THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA.
That’s somewhere near Guinea-Bissau, right?
wolfman
September 24, 2008, 1:32pm
6
I was thinking it was a secured compound somewhere in Idaho.
Eight hundred billion dollars is the amount they announced this morning for the free government money give away to financial institutions. Coincidence? I think not!
See, here’s the beauty of it, I’m going to give them only one of my account numbers, then when the money shows up there, I’m going to transfer all of it to another account of mine so that I’ll get to keep the whole thing!
Tuckerfan:
See, here’s the beauty of it, I’m going to give them only one of my account numbers, then when the money shows up there, I’m going to transfer all of it to another account of mine so that I’ll get to keep the whole thing!
<keels over in awe of Tuck’s financial savvy>
Congratulations, dude! Man, I wish it was me. Check this out:
You are so gonna be rich. Woo for you!
They fucked me over so be careful. I only saw $8 billion of it at the end and there was a $500 processing fee.
