You know when you were in college and had a party and the cops showed up for the 3rd time that night and weren’t too keen on your party anymore? I’m the one who should go outside and talk to them.
And I really would like to have a beer with Acid Lamp one day.
Also Santo Rugger knows as much about explosives as I wish I did.
Tending bar and Foosball.
Damn, that’s not much.
I’ve been known to discuss guitars.
I also love books - both the contents between the covers and the books themselves; I have a collection of first editions and know a lot of the arcanery associated with that obession…
Wine, and to a lesser degree, cooking.
Certified sommelier, 20+ years in the restuarant biz
Writing and marketing science fiction and fantasy (and books in general).
I’m a published science fiction author. No, you probably never heard of me.
Ancient Greek and Roman history and religion;
Latin and Ancient Greek as languages.
I apparently have no other interests. That’s pretty sad.
I have a pretty good knowledge of pretty much all of Heinlein’s writings, though there are at least one or two on the board who have better knowledge.
Hmmmm… I have no idea if there’s anything I know better than anyone else on this board. That’s actually kind of depressing.
Pop culture: Thundercats, Silverhawks, Jem & the Holograms
Geek: RenFaire in California, conlanging, furry fandom
Work: Adobe Illustrator, Photoshop, Epson 880 printers
Japanese-related items, although there’s at least 3-4 people on the board who know much more than me.
My other hobbies are singing, weightlifting, anime, videogames, and Yugioh. I would’t call myself an expert, but I’ll do my best to answer any questions.
Put me down for military history. If I don’t know off the top of my head, the answer is likely no further than my bookshelf (especially WW2).
Subjects I can provide experienced/educated opinions on include traditional (pen-and-paper) role-playing games; science-fiction & fantasy; and, though you can’t always tell based on my posts, I’m fairly handy with English spelling and grammar.
Caring for and breeding many different pet animals, from snakes to chihuahuas
Making homemade candles, soap, and the like
Thanks to my 8 year old son, Bakugan (the new Pokemon)
candy making, more fudge and toffees than chocolate confections
sewing garments. I’ve been sewing clothing for 20 years off and on.
I’m well-versed in a number of things, but it seems that everything I do is done better by a whole sea of Dopers.
But as far as I know, I’m one of only two Dopers with some experience in conducting orchestras. While strictly at the amateur level, I’ve conducted 45 operatic performances.
ETA: Oh yeah, and I orchestrated an opera.
I think I’m first in knowledge about the Yankees on this board, but maybe I just post the most about them. We have several season ticket holders like **D_Odds **so it is probably the second.
I would be in the semi-large group after **Qadgop the Mercotan **for Tolkien knowledge.
I believe my knowledge of the RPG programming language and OS400 for the AS400 is tops on the Dope but so far that has proven useful twice. 
My general computer knowledge is nothing special among Dopers. We are overloaded in IT people.
My knowledge of 1st Ed. AD&D is among the tops, but I think **Glee **is #1.
I’m a history buff but again my knowledge is far from the tops on this board.
Heinlein is another were I must acknowledge a dozen ahead of me thought IRL I would be the expert in most cases.
E.E. Doc Smith is probably the same. I think at least **Qadgop the Mercotan **is ahead of me.
Sailing and Repairing Wooden Garveys has not proven very useful for the board.
Jim
Dowload and install the Lispbox and then use this book. That will put you well on your way to learning Common Lisp, which is the most practically useful of the two non-embedded Lisp dialects still in common use. (The other is Scheme, which suffers from a lack of libraries and de facto standardization. It’s a great language for college-level CS classes (see The Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs for an example) but isn’t really good for application-building. All of the other Lisp dialects in modern use are the extension languages of various applications, notably Emacs and AutoCAD.)
I’ll claim dog training (clicker and other positive methods) clock repair, horticulture and some birding.
What do you do for living?
Lawyer.
Do you have any hobbies or collections?
I study martial arts and self defense, and teach beginner classes. I also run and do weight training.
What sort of interests do you have?
I have a BA in Anthropology/Psychology. I also play guitar, and used to sing for a moderately successful but unsigned rock band in college. I used to live in the Czech Republic.
Probably the only area in which I have any expertise is skydiving (and related subjects such as parachutes, free-falling and so on).
I’ve made over 1,000 jumps (and never used my reserve parachute!) in 36 states, been on a few state records for largest formation, jumped out of all kinds of flying machines, like helicopters, a biplane, a 727, a C-130, DC-3’s, a hot-air balloon.
Network Security – for both home office and corporate settings. Protecting yourself from malware, phishing, identity theft, and hacking attacks in general. I currently do penetration testing for a living, but don’t ask me how to hack someone, cuz I won’t tell you that 
Music – I have quite an esoteric library, so if you’re interested in some new listens, I can point you somewhere interesting. I also studied Music Theory and History quite a bit, and I have a Bachelor’s in Vocal Performance; I’ve studied both piano and guitar as well. I can geek out for hours over musical phrasings and orchestrations, intrumentation, repetition and variation, tension and expectations, as well as intended meanings/significance behind nonvocal/nonlyrical music.
Computer Gaming – I started with an Atari 800 in 1983, ran my own BBS on a 2400 modem in high school, and have been childishly indulging in computer games for the better part of 25 years.
Computer building – Not quite as current on recent technology as I’d like, but I’ve been building my own (PC/Windows) desktops (and those of friends and family) for almost 20 years now. Given a budget and your objective, I can give you some tips on how to maximize bang for your buck in purchasing, as well as some technical help with putting it all together.
Cooking – Vietnamese cooking, to be specific. I’ve been dabbling with Indian, Mediterranean, and Cuban lately, but I haven’t gotten as deep into it as I would like. Though these Indian-spiced Salmon Fingers with green mint chutney I discovered a couple weeks ago – to die for, baby!
Other than mafia, I am farily knowledgable about the lively art of theatre. My focus would be on directing/acting and critical theory with lesser expertise in general tech element. I am a tad out of touch with what is going on in the mainstream as far as productions go, but if you want to talk about the merits of Jerzy Grotowski vs. Brechtian theory I am your guy.
If you have questions about pipe tobacco or tobacco pipes or accessories I am your man.
Once upon a time I would have been an excelent eBay resource, but I don’t know how much use I am anymore. Maybe I am still some use. Up until 2 years ago my day job involved running an eBay store.
I know a bit about cooking and a bit about alcohol and a bit about guitars, but there are many others who I would place ahead of me in those areas.