Can I play too?
Do I need another to nominate me. I have bribe money.
I have good news and bad news. (insert funny joke here).
On the good news side, we have all the participants we need to start (11 as of right now). So the bad news is, I don’t think we have any more spots. I’ll email everyone who is participating, just to confirm that they are in, so check your boxes (and get your mind out of the gutter.)
I was debating posting the screennames of the people who will be participating, but, it seems to be agreed by all that blind posting will work best and to avoid this becoming a popularity contest.
Here’s what I’m thinking:
1) Topic: When I first posted this idea, I thought along the lines of dalovindj (God help me!). I toyed with the idea of using newspaper/periodical stories as the topic, but I thought they would, in fact, be too limiting, for all the reasons dj gave. With two simple words to work off of, the world is your oyster. Anything goes. Creativity, which some say is the heart of comedy, runs rampant. I was afraid that with an article of somekind and 10 participants, there may be too much overlap between posts.
2) Judging: I want it open to all the Dopers who want to judge. I fear picking particular people to judge other posts, so I figured it would be best to open it to everyone. One Doper One Vote type of thing.
3) Shakes: I could really go for a Shamrock Shake right now, but dammit St. Patrick’s day is over.
4) Contest/Time: 1,000 words or less. Bowing to Dave’s idea, perhaps 4 days is best to give participants an opportunity if real life gets in the way.
Here’s what I came up with:
On Thursday at 3:00 p.m. Central Standard Time, I will post the two words that will be the topic. I will select these words completely at random, one chosen from one of my daughter’s children’s book, and one chosen, at random, from the dictionary. I reserve the right to veto any words (lest we have 10,000 words on “Maisy’s pyralidid”). Participants, those who have the guts (cough cough), will then have until noon on Sunday to email me with their comic piece. NO POSTING DIRECTLY TO THIS THREAD!!!. Starting at noon, I will post all entries in the order I received them. As soon as the last one is posted, judging begins, with whoever wants to judge just coming in and posting their vote/thoughts. On Tuesday night at 6:00 p.m., judging will be closed, we’ll total the votes, and I’ll post the winner of the first ever Best Comic Piece (Until the Next One Comes Along). I will also post, unless asked not to by the participant, which Doper posted which piece.
Whew. Now I know how Price Waterhouse feels.
I am, as always, completely available to reconsider these rules. Consider it a preliminary experiment. I expect there will be some fine tuning if we get to do a second round of it. So keep the suggestions coming.
Now, I’m off to email the participants. Good Luck all.
I’d like to voice some objections to a completely free-form subject matter.
I have at least one totally selfish reason – it’s not my forte. Personally, I’m more of a witty conversationalist than a standup comic. I can interact better than I can extemporize.
I have a couple of other more philosophical(?) objections:
- “Free form” essay contests, IMHO, will be troubled by “apples to oranges” comparison issues. And the judging thread will be filled with rants about it (though I promise to limit myself to 1 *I told you so *post).
- The temptation will be great for someone (not one of Us, of course, but someone down the line) to submit a little gem they’ve been struggling over for some time. How do we know that it’s original and produced within the four days, unless some kind of subject matter is announced at the start of the 4 day period?
Here’s what I suggest we do. Either in this thread, or a new one for little more marketing value :), we put out an RFP for as many online, free, periodical links as people can suggest. You, Hamlet, pick one, and post your choice at a given time.
To give the writers some more wiggle room, let us respond to ANYTHING in the issue, including the ligitmacy of the periodical.
I will, grumpily, withdraw my objections if there is no further support for them. :rolleyes: Hey, it’s the 21st century, no one will ever be stoic again. There are FAR too many things to complain about, and EVERYBODY can complain to the whole friggin WORLD!
I have to take issue with you, yojimboguy. A free-form humorous essay is the only fair way to do it. This way, whatever form a participant is most comfortable with can be used, be it a straight essay, a humorous dialogue, or a satiric movie review. The field is wide open.
Thus, your point #1 (the entries being troubled by “apples to oranges” comparison issues) doesn’t really hold water, IMHO. The contest isn’t about comparisons in any regard except whether the author tickled the reader’s funnybone. How that is accomplished (or by which literary devices) is inconsequential, except perhaps by how well the style enhances the comedy.
Point #2 is a matter of integrity. Besides, if Hamlet comes up with the words “marzipan” and “federalize”, it hardly seems likely that someone will have been struggling over a piece with those two exact words for the past three months.
Your suggestion to have a reaction piece to an item in a periodical is limiting, I believe. The reasons for widening it with a two-word topic have been listed above.
Hey, it’s not my forte either, it’s not even my strong point.
But I will go by the rooles posted.
Dammit!!
[sub]jckaz crosses off federalized marzipan bit[/sub]
Hey, where’d the red-faced, embarrassed rainbow smiley go?
Somehow I skipped the first sentence in my first reading, and incorrectly interpreted your rules as “Anything goes, a thousand words or less”. 
I hereby completely withdraw my non-selfish objections to the rules.
My selfish objection will become an internalized, bitterly crushed-down inner angst, swirling into the black hole of my life’s disappointments, invisible yet exerting an undeniable influence over all nearby bodies.
Wow, I better brighten up if I want to be funny by Thursday!
yojimboguy, I’ve found that the Emily Litella coding works very well in these situations.
[Emily Litella]Never mind![/Emily Litella]
Works every time.
It’s a moot point now, but it had also occurred to me that random word choice as a writing spur is a creative writing exercise from way back.
Also, that, depending on the articles, some people might feel a little handcuffed. For instance, I never do political humor, and would find it really tough to put myself in that mode if I absolutely had to.
But it really doesn’t matter anyway.
[Emily Litella]Never mind![/Emily Litella]
Embrace the dark side. I feel it growing in you. You are not alone. Others join me daily. Just give in! Together, we will rule the galaxy with an Iron Fist!
DaLovin’ Dj
AM I the only one who pictures dalovindj doing finger stretching exercises and watching old Monty Python Flying Circus episodes to stretch his humor muscle? (and I don’t mean that one muscle of your’s that is funny on it’s own, dj).
I got the emails out finally, so everyone who is in for this should have gotten one. I made a slight miscalculation, and we have about 15 participants rather than 10, but I’m not overly concerned. One last minute change in the topic selection: I’ll be using the Thursday copy of the Chicago Sun Times for random word selection, rather than the dictionary. After a few dry runs, there is just too much room for poor word selection with the dictionary. Plus, it may open the door for some more topical humor.
See you Thursday at 3:00 p.m. Good Luck!
Just to be clear. You’ll post the words to this thread or to a new one?
I say a new thread alltogether. Make this thread the official place for rules and debate about rules and start a new thread for each month (or however often we do this).
FTR, I use old episodes of “The State” to stretch my humour muscle. For the other muscle I prefer photographs of girls kissing each other.
DaLovin’ Dj
I agree with you.
About starting a new thread or the muscle stretching power of photographs of girls kissing?
Regardless, I will post the topic in this thread, but post the Comic Pieces in a brand new, shiny thread, and we’ll have the judges vote in that new thread. Hope that sounds as good as girls kissing to everyone involved.
Hamlet, I have a favor to ask… I’m on vacation all next week so I’m going to miss all the fun.
I’ve subscribed to this thread, so please post the appropriate links in this thread, so when I return I can easily find the submissions and the results.
(it’ll be a little bit like entering a room after the party is over… seeing all the confetti and empty glasses and half inflated balloons… but I’ll take what I can get.)
Thanks.
Rules and regs here. New thread for the contest posts. I have no idea what “The State” is but I find nothing beats flexing the humor muscle than an old fashioned perusal of the newspaper.
re: Stinky Cheese.
Wondering why you all would make a humourous story about me, and I don’t stink.
DONG DONG DONG
No, that’s not my tribute to Milton Berle, it’s the bell tolling for our lucky participants. I hope all of you have your spinning beanie hats on and are ready, because it’s time to announce the topic.
Consider this the boring speech that the head of Price Waterhouse gives during the Oscars. It’s only for those who are interested in the selection process, so skip it if you want. I used the random number generator from random.org, to select the page, then the line, then the word in the Sun Times. I did the same with a pile of my child’s books, to choose which book, page, etc. After a couple of aborted efforts (Using “had” and “a” as the topic may make it a little to open), I found the words for the topic. Without further ado, here are your words:
OG SMASH!!!
O.K., not really. Here it is, for real:
FUZZY and HELL
[sub]The random children’s book chosen was the Winnie the Pooh’s Senses, the 1st word on the 2nd line on the 2nd page was fuzzy (Yellow and Black, Fuzzy and fast - Pooh sees a honeybee). The 4th word on the 20th line of the 1st story on page 3 was hell(Suddenly, it was hell, said one of the guests").[/sub]
Think of these words merely as a springboard. You can use these words in any way you wish, but incorporate them somehow into your Comic Piece. I do not envy your task. Remember: Be creative. Be offbeat, if you wish. But most of all be funny!!! Good Luck All.
This can only end in tears.
Esprix
I really don’t get the whole “This is bad cause someone’s feelings are going to get hurt” attitude coming from certain quarters. There is nothing unusual nor especially cruel about a writing contest. Especially a blind one. They happen all the time. Anyone who would whine in a sincere manner about losing a good-natured conest like this is an immature loser who should rethink their hanging out around adults. Take that negativity over to the pit.
In advance: Bitch about losing and you can go to fuzzy hell as far as I’m concerned.
DaLovin’ Dj