Oh, absolutely. The question is WHY is it full of crap. OK, that’s easy too, it’s full of crap because he won’t “let” you throw stuff out. So the important question is why is he so attached to keeping computer bits that don’t work and empty Cadbury wrappers. Hoarding is an emotional or psychological issue, rarely is it laziness. If it was laziness, he wouldn’t care if YOU hauled the non-working computers to the trash heap, right?
Hoarding comes in many flavors, and I think it’s important for a hoarder to identify their type before they can know how to talk themselves out of it. One form of hoarding is out of a fear of not having something when you need it. Throw away the magazines, and he might not have the picture he needs later. Get rid of the computers, and he might find that those are the only computers he has to use, if he just gets them running again. This type of hoarding sometimes responds to a reality check: unless you’re woefully poor, you can get a decent computer for a reasonable price if you need to replace whatever you have that works. Pictures and magazine articles are available online, so there’s no need to store this stuff in physical form anymore.
A close cousin is the “I never have enough” hoarder. Enough time, enough tools, enough stuff. This hoarder isn’t getting rid of stuff because of an emptiness or lack in their lives that they think they can fill with stuff. The guy who buys every new PDA that comes out, or the gal that has 100 pair of shoes might be this type.
There’s the sentimental hoarder: this is the person who has old notes from high school, softball trophies from grade school, textbooks, loose photos and even clothing that doesn’t fit anymore but “it’s the shirt I wore to that concert in 1984! I can’t throw THAT out!” I love how Clean Sweep deals with these people: get a display case of a finite size and display your sentimental items. Anything that can’t fit in the case is gone. You don’t need a ratty t-shirt to remember a good time.
The crafters and sewers will recognize this one: creative hoarders. These are the folks who have 264 AOL CD holders because “These would be really great for something!” I’m not talking about my MIL, who saves corks - she actually has a plan for them and uses them to make cork lined teatrays. It’s those of us who find some oddity and save it because we “never know when it might be useful!”
There’s the hobby hoarders. These are people for whom the items in question represent their hobby that they don’t have time for. He really, really wants to be able to tinker with computers in his spare time. The fact that he doesn’t have any spare time in which to tinker bothers him a lot. Getting rid of the computers is giving in and admitting he’s got no time for himself, and he won’t anytime in the near future.
Note that all of these things, in moderation, are normal and even admirable. Fixing an old computer is a good thing - it reduces waste, gives you something to do and saves money. But if you’re not *doing *it, you’re doing none of those things. Having several pairs of shoes instead of just one not only looks good, but is better for your feet - wearing the same shoes everyday increases fungal infections. But those dozens of pairs you never use don’t fulfill that function. Having mementoes of your past is wonderful, and emotionally soothing in times of stress. But having bits of paper that you never look at isn’t. Expressing creativity and recycling found objects into art or blankets is fantastic - but if you never use the stuff, it’s not part of your creative expression. Having a hobby and the tools to pursue it is good for mental health and learning - but if the clutter is never used it’s not really hobby material after all.
Anyhow, the point of all this rambling is to suggest that nagging a hoarder from one point of view isn’t useful if he’s a hoarder for a different reason.
dangermom, I’m not ignoring your question, I’m just trying to figure out what I think about it.
