Servers United: Please share your wisdom/advice

In My Humble Opinion
1

I have recently entered the world of serving at a grown up establishment (the last one was about 20 years ago at a burger joint) and have a few questions. I would appreciate any advice or words of wisdom. In no particular order:

  1. What is the best thing to do when you screw up an order? I forgot to put in an appetizer and told the party that I forgot (when they reminded me). I was very apologetic, and they were very nice about it and just canceled it since their order was about to come out. However, upon giving them the check, I wondered if I should have reiterated my mistake (“I’m sorry again about the appetizer”) or just forget it. To me, re-apologizing makes it seem like I’m hoping they don’t penalize my tip, which seems too kiss-ass.

  2. What is the best way to deal with weirdos? I had a single party guy who just struck me as off…best to be friendly or never smile?

  3. What is the best thing to do when they hate their food? I had a party of two and one of them just hated his prime rib - cooked fine but he thought it was all fat and gristle (it was). He did not want to return it or speak to anyone, he just wanted to go “on record.” I did tell the manager, but she did not go over and speak to him. When I gave them their check, I just said (very nicely), “I’m sorry it wasn’t better for you.”

  4. What is the best way to deal with a dish that gets ordered a lot but people are continually unhappy with? The aforementioned prime rib, for example. Our speciality is fish, which is quite good and we get a lot of compliments. However, about 50% of the people that have ordered prime rib end up not liking it (management knows). Should I take it upon myself to nudge people away from it?

That’s all I can think of at the moment. If anyone has any advice on something I haven’t covered, please chime in.

Thanks!

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  1. Order screwed up, your fault: I think you handled it fine. You are right, you don’t want to be too fawningly apologetic but of course you don’t want to act like it’s nothing either. I think what you did was fine, and if you had apologized once again when delivering the check that would have been fine too. Beyond that, unless you did something really horrible (like spilling a tray of beers on someone’s head), a couple of apologies is plenty.

  2. Dealing with weirdos: best thing to do is to act professional. Do not be “friendly”; do not make small talk, do not make the weirdo believe you have any interest whatsoever in him beyond being his server. Just act professional and competent: offer a reasonable yet minimum amount of pleasantries, take his order, and deliver his food.

  3. People hate their food: apologize, even though it is NOT your fault in the least - you are apologizing on behalf of the restaurant. Then tell the manager and let her deal with it. That’s what she’s there for. I don’t know why the man wanted to tell you but not anyone else - what are you supposed to do about it? - and I think the manager should have apologized to him. And, if he didn’t eat it and it was truly bad (not that he just didn’t like it), it should have been removed from the bill. If he ate the whole thing and THEN said it was bad, um no. That’s not how it works.

  4. Frequently ordered items suck: this is a tough one. You don’t want to start off with, “Hello, I’m your server and oh yeah the prime rib is no good” but you don’t want people to be unhappy with their meal either. I would take every opportunity to steer people away from it if the opportunity arises. That is, if they say, “What’s bettter, X or prime rib?” I’d say, “Well, a lot of people order the prime rib but frankly, it’s not all that great and people are often disappointed. X is much better and people seem who have had both seem to like it a lot more.” I’d kind of bend down a little a say this in a lowered voice, as if you’re letting them in on a little secret. Nine times out of ten, they’re going to say thanks for letting them know and then order X. If they just order the PR and ask nothing about it, I think you just have to let them order it. You could also state up front “Just want to let you know, the house specialty is fish - we have it this way and that way and this other way - and it’s really great, very fresh, and everyone who orders it is very happy and I highly recommend it.” That will give them the nudge to at least ask if the PR is good too, at which point you can give them the “little secret” talk.

Good luck!