I was at that game. Malarchuk skated out of the crease with his hand on his neck and blood spurting 5 feet above his head. It was f’n gruesome. The trainer sprinted out and pressed on it with one hand waving frantically for help.
Next day the paper said it was his Jugular - which I believe is under the chin. The carotid is on the temple (I think). They also said you have 15 minutes before you will succumb. Richard Zednik had a similar injury and he skated himself to the bench.
Of course! I was there to attend to him! 
Afterwards, I had the inmate workers don protective gear and clean the room. Their reports to the inmate grapevine certainly engendered a greater degree of respect and deference from my patients ever after. 
Sorry, no. The carotids run from the upper chest through the neck and into the skull.
At the temple you’ll find the temporal artery.
What a coincidence!
I don’t think so. I’ve done blood draws from the femoral vein, which is right next to the femoral artery, and the venous blood didn’t pulse at all.
We’ve discussed this before. The answer that made most sense was that the body has to have such major arteries running up into the head because the brain needs such a major supply of blood, but that adding some sort of “armor” around the neck itself would probably restrict neck movement too much, and make us less capable of hunting, among other things. So instead the optimum combination seems to be leaving the neck fairly open to allow for a good range of movement, but also allowing us to protect it by lifting the shoulders and dipping the chin, and obviously with our arms.
Thanks! Perhaps though they would be more protected further inside the neck? Perhaps running along the spinal column?
We should write that up as an RFC so it can be considered for inclusion in the next revision.
Also: testicles in a less-convenient-to-kick location.
Amen to that brother!
When I saw the title, I was worried this thread was started by someone who had just cut themself…
Severed cartoid artery. Need answer f
Hollywood would never agree.
Or frat boys looking for You Tube fame.
Eh - the current location facilitates cooling, and is reasonably defensible - a simple twist or dodge puts one’s leg between an assailant and the family jewels. Not a perfect defense, but enough that a swift kick to the groin is easier joked about than done.
It’s worth considering that, ultimately, there are all sorts of modifications one could imagine that would make the human body more rugged; for example, what if the rib cage extended down to protect the entirety of the torso? That would certainly make humans better able to take a hit - but we’d also be slower and less flexible, and thus less able to avoid the hit in the first place.
In fact, that’s probably a good point in general: Some animals evolved with a defensive strategy oriented around absorbing or deflecting damage harmlessly. (Turtles would be the classic example.) Humans, however, evolved with a defensive strategy oriented around damage avoidance - a blow from a tiger will kill or maim us, but we’re tall enough, fast enough (over a distance), and smart enough to avoid that blow in the first place. It’s not a perfect strategy - if you’re sick, foolish, or unlucky, the tiger will still get into striking range, and there’s not a lot you can do at this point unless you’re armed. But history clearly demonstrates that, most of the time, avoiding rather than surviving punishing blows is a good-enough strategy. We’re here, after all, while most tiger species are endangered.