The social benefit, not to sound all tautological about it, is that it’s social. Friendly gestures in a social setting serve as a lubricant for the social community. I hold doors for people who approach them; I smile and nod at people who pass me on the sidewalk; I shovel my neighbor’s sidewalk after I do mine if it isn’t shoveled already. All of these have very little tangible benefit, but collectively serve to embiggen our sense of each other as connected members of the community.
You must want something from your neighbor, or else you wouldn’t do it. Perhaps his wife is hot? :rolleyes:
This is my new favorite expression to see if people are thinking as they’re listening.
Ah, yes, the Frylock Scenario.
He’s in his eighties and a widower. But according to Frylock, I’m going to expect to named in his will.
You’re lumping a lot of things together under the idea of ‘friendly gestures’. As BrightNShiny is pointing out, you could have also added giving candy to kids under your idea of social lubricant. At this point, that’s not a social norm.
You’ve changed the hypothetical in this paragraph. Your original hypothetical is saying ‘Have a good evening’ and later changed to ‘hi’ to strangers on a public street. Whether you nod or smile is extraneous to the hypothetical.
As has been pointed out in this thread, New Yorkers don’t generally say hi to other people as they pass each other on public streets. New Yorkers still have a social community that thrives. New Yorkers still have other opportunities to see each other as connected members of a community.
You’re right that you pointed out the social part, and that it is tautological. You didn’t point out the benefit part. What’s the upside to the particular behavior of saying hi to strangers on a public street?
Are you saying that there’s a potential for harm in one stranger politely nodding and saying “hi” as he passes a lady on the street?
harm noun \ˈhärm
: physical or mental damage or injury : something that causes someone or something to be hurt, broken, made less valuable or successful, etc.
Because, honestly, I’m missing it totally.
What’s the upside of shoveling your neighbors snow?
Thank you. I’m glad to see we have a few sane people on this board.
Here’s the thing. Those kids were walking around wearing costumes. On Halloween. That’s what kids are supposed to do if they want candy. If their parents don’t want people offering the kids candy, then why are they letting them dress like that?
And yet, somehow I’m the bad guy. 
This being the Dope, I gotta say - WTF? :dubious:
A simple Google search with the terms “how many people die of starvation every day” leads to a highlighted result from poverty.com:
I’ve no idea what the hell “died in all World War I’s combined” is actually meant to convey, but taking it as probably meaning to include civilian and military deaths, a reasoned estimate puts the total killed at around 37 million. Even on a daily averaged basis you’d still be incorrect (1 August 1914 to 11 November 1918 = 1564 days; 37,000,000 / 1564 = 23,657 killed daily in WW1).
Yes, that’s true – but I did not attempt, in those earlier posts, to craft my hypothetical with razor-edge precision. I merely laid a non-exhaustive set of examples that served as indicators.
Do they? Would it be fair to say that New Yorkers feel the same ease and comfort in their walk on the street as do residents of my Northern Virginia community?
General uplifting of the mood of people.
Which is an inarguable social good.
Common courtesies are part of social communication, bonding us together as a species, reducing barriers, and making the world a better place. In this I absolutely agree with Bricker. Helping someone pick up something they dropped. Holding a door. Asking little old ladies if they’d like help crossing the street. Asking a harried mom if you can help her with her groceries while she wrangles her kids. Shoveling the neighbor’s walk. A simple greeting, wave, nod.
Those are all important things and beneficial to this social body we’ve constructed out of our troop-based ancestry.
Not asking a woman to smile. Not holding a door for a woman just because she’s a woman. Not providing “help” without asking. Not commenting on someone’s appearance, clothing, hair, or facial expression. Not leering, ogling, whistling, or offering mustache rides. Not walking next to someone you don’t know in an effort to make conversation. Not a lot of other shitty, microaggressive, objectifying things that we’ve tried in the past to convince women are acceptable.
They aren’t, and they do not contribute to social well-being.
You can’t say something is “inarguable” around here. It’s just taken as a challenge.
I don’t see anything in your examples that even remotely resembles saying “hello” to someone.
It’s a fair cop.
.
Well, I certainly meant to include it as part of:
Well, i must apologize, since I read your post an entirely different way than it was intended, in fact a different way than it was written. My fault :smack:
But you’re forgetting that strawmen abound in this thread.
Sorry, but I actually agree with andros and Bricker
Errr… What do you think my position is?
actually, i’m not sure now. you responded what I thought was favorably to my mistaken post, so I don’t know really. Pretend I never posted 