I’ve had this as long as I can remember and it sucks. I was recently on a medication that caused “urinal hesitation” which just compounded the problem. It also dried me out so I drank at least a liter of water a day. I felt like I had to pee like a race-horse every twenty minutes but could actually “run the rapids” only a fraction of my daily attempts at work. I tried thinking other things, flushing first to get the sound of water running (works if you can get started in the 4 second window of a urinal flush). Talking to other people at bat… None of that was truly successful.
Then I figured out that I didn’t have the problem when I sat down in a stall. Only a problem trying to go while standing. So now when I am out and about I just use a stall (after laying down a carpet of toilet paper on the seat…).
Never tried thinking of England though…
I ran across a support site on the Internet a few years back. The technical term for the condition is Paruresis.
Of course I have it. But I only seem to have it at work. It would be kind of weird to have it at home, since I live alone.
It’s definitely psychological, so when I have to go, I make sure I have to go, I wait until I know it’ll be coming out like Niagra falls, that usually seems to stop it from happening. Also I look away from the guy next to me, and imagine running water… Sometime if I go in and someone is there, I’ll jsut wash my hands and leave, come back later. Weird. I also flush if I can’t and someone is standing next to me, I always wonder if he knows. Oddly enough the trough “urinal’s” don’t bother me. You’d think with all that time standing in line it would make me nervous, but no. Maybe becuase it’s a sporting event and I’m there because of a beer or two and that relaxes me?? Who knows. Urination, a weird thing.
A female friend of mine has a variation on the same problem - she’s not thrilled if someone’s in the bathroom while she’s peeing, but she can handle it. If someone’s in there while she’s performing the OTHER, uh, excretory function, she can barely manage. Especially if the person in there is someone she knows - I can’t be in there doing my make-up or anything, or she can’t release. That’s gotta suck.
I used to (occasionally) suffer from “piss fright” as it were, when I was a teenager. This one time, I was at a concert in a stadium with a friend. Anyway, between acts, I really had to go, and so did he. We went into the washrooms, which had those low, roundish urinals that leave nothing to the imagination. So we’re there, and he’s able to go, but I couldn’t. He hitches up his pants and waits for me, probably staring at my dick. That made it even worse. Finally, I just gave up. Having beforehand told him I had to go, he then said, “liar.” Not nice. I don’t recall how I eventually evacuated, but I think I went back in and went in a stall.
Anyway, urinal fright became history once I got used to gang showers and all the other lovely things that males endure/enjoy.
um…, as a physician who’s dealt with this problem, I’ve told some patients to do the following: exhale all the air out of your lungs that you can, then hold your breath. You should start to pee before you pass out.
I’m not shy at all except when it comes to my bladder. I got over it by replaying old footage of Stuka dive bombers in my head. I have no freaking idea why this works, or how I came up with it. Not like I’m a Nazi sympathizer or anything.
Doesn’t work for drug tests at my job though. The (invariably female) nurse waits right outside the stall for me to do my business, and I get the stage fright bad! They tend to get rather suspicious after the tenth minute goes by.
There’s an article about this problem in today’s (Apr. 14) NY Times. “For some, Drug tests are almost impossible” Some folks have even lost jobs because they couldn’t pee for a drug test. Some studies suggest up to 7% of the population suffers from paruresis to some degree. In the harder cases, once the system locks up, the victim must be catheterized to get relief. The Times gives the web site as shybladder.org
This used to be a big issue for me - less in recent years. I just tell myself that they’re going to think I’m weird because I’m NOT peeing, and its silly to not pee, etc. Or I just concentrate on the act of it, kind of on the physical motions (?) that need to be done in order to let it out (does that make sense to anyone?). It works for me, at least! As for “the other”, I’m still a bit shy about that, but I know what washrooms I can go to on campus that rarely have people in them, or I just wait a bit, and if I really have to go that badly, well then, it just doesn’t seem to be a problem anymore!
Thanks AskNott. I thought it might be somewhat common. I have to hydrate to the point of agony when I’m told to show up for a test.
An old girlfriend once confided to me that she threw away a package of expensive computer parts at her accounting job after her fourth drug test in 6 months. She didn’t say, but I think she had the same problem.
