::Sigh:: Goodbye drugs. It was fun...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Well, it looks like you’re all now posting with a totally drug-free Lucki. You see, somehow the school caught wind of rumors that I had been high at Homecoming (not true, I’ll explain in a sec), and it’s school policy to notify parents no matter what if they hear a rumor of drug use and to suspend students if they are at school functions in an altered state. The first policy bugs me a little, the second is completely reasonable.

Anyways, when they told me about this, I just told them the truth, which was that I had gotten high the day of Homecoming, but had been perfectly clear-headed when I came to school some 6 hours later. It seems one of my partners in crime (it was his weed) had told a LOT of people what was going on, cause everyone knew. Anyway, all 4 of us got busted, all of us told the truth, and because there had been significant time between the act and arriving at school they’re letting us off with notifying parents, drug counselling and… FREQUENT TESTS! This clearly spells the end for me and my good friend Mary Jane.

What really burns my ass is that we were as responsible as possible when we did it. We went off to the middle of the woods where we could not conceivably get caught by cops. We didn’t do it at school, I didn’t drive high, etc. I mean it just was so harmless.

At least my last time (for the next year and a half or so) was a great one. We were sitting in the woods where there were all these green trees and plants, and then little yellow flowers. I lost all my depth perception, except the little flowers were closer than the green, all over my field of vision. It was really pretty.

I wouldn’t consider myself dependent on pot, it’s just something I really used to enjoy. Starting off with that “thumb on the tape of life” feeling, where everything stops synching up, like there’s a little delay. Then to that crazy echoing state, and then off to total no-sense-of-time stoned-zone. It makes me a little sad when I hear really cool psychadelic songs, or really any reference to drug culture. I just think, “Awww, it would have been cool to get the chance to get high and listen to that”

I’m gonna miss the excitement of trying new and ever-more-potent strains of my favorite plant, listening with satisfaction and afficion as the smoke bubbled up through the water in our homemade hookahs and in to my lungs, into my head.

I’ll miss the way that everything is so much more amazing in this childlike way. Everything is prettier, you love eveeryone you’re with, and every food you taste is the best you’ve ever had, every bite better than the last, each new food better than the one before it. Damn.

::sniff:: Goodbye, 17 minute version of Inna Gadda Da Vida. Goodbye, Army Of Darkness. Goodbye, random headshop literature. Goodbye, kissing my stoned friends of both genders and having it be a truly beautiful moment. Goodbye, long afternoons lying in the grass at Peace Park, amazed to the point of paralysis by the beauty of the intricacies of nature. Goodbye altered states. I’ll miss you.

Anyone else said goodbye lately? Anyone when they weren’t ready? Any tips?

LC

2

I said goodbye to my heart, in a bad way, just to tell ya.

3

Goodbye stranger
It’s been nice
Hope you find your paradise . . .

4

Oh forgot this.

As part of my various punishments I had to cut off my hair. My beautiful hair. My long, flowing, wavy, happy hippie hair. Goodbye hair. You were cool, but no match for pot.

LC

5

Goodbye, Tenacious D. Goodbye, being entranced by rising incense smoke. Goodbye, lying on my back with friends setting the strobe light so that the fan appears to stop, but the wind keeps coming. Goodbye, playing music and sounding just plain great. Goodbye, prog-rock. Goodbye, Nerf Herder. Goodbye, http://www.abrupt.org . Goodbye, http://www.erowid.com . Goodbye, musing about third eyes and trust and love and just letting it flow and for a little while at least, having it all figured out.

I wanna be sedated.

LC

6

Call me cyncial - but I’ll bet you any reasonable stakes you care to name that you smoke pot again before June 30, 2002.

  • Rick
7

What if you find out that Circus Peanuts actually suck when you’re not stoned?

8

Dude. Sucks.

9

*I’ll see you soon again my friend
The times that we’ve shared been so genuine
Know that you had to go
But you’ll tell me where you’ve been
'Cause I’ll see you soon again my friend

I quit all drugs (except cigarettes and the occasional beer) about 5 years ago when they started giving me panic attacks. I definately feel your pain though giving it up unwillingly. I had some really good times on pot…and acid, and mushrooms.

[sub]BTW - can they really make you take drug tests at school? Are you on a sports team or something? If I wasn’t playing sports and they wanted to drug test me I would definately look into some alternative form of schooling. Is there a college nearby that offers high school classes? That’s how I got my diploma (Note: DIPLOMA, not GED.)[/sub]

10

Wah, wah, wah, oh, life was so beautiful when I was stoned…

Life’s what you make of it, sport, stoned or sober. The quicker you learn that, the happier you’ll be.

11

From a positive standpoint; I’ve been clean for about a year and a half (2.24.00), by my own accord. Though I’ve never been forced to quit, I wish I would have sooner. After a few weeks, I never had the urge to smoke anymore, and my life began to get a whole lot better (i.e. GPA, focus, , cops, etc.). Though this is a negative experience now, look ahead to what you may take away from it. ALso, if music isn't as good to you when you're sober, you're into it for the wrong reasons. Just my .02
Oh yeah, and now it’s time to meet your new best friend: alcohol :wink:

12

I used to smoke a lot of pot. For years I got high every evening. It didn’t hold me back any. During those years I earned a BS and a MS in Mechanical Engineering. As the last few years went by, I got the urge less and less. I’m 37 years old now and I think that I’ve smoked pot three or four times in all of 2001. I don’t miss it at all. Actually I don’t like the new stronger weed all that much. I much prefer the milder stuff of the old days.

Haj

13

As an ex pothead, I definitely have to agree with moe.ron. He and I sit around all the time and watch our friends get high and stupid, all the while enjoying ourselves without herb. I noticed that after I quit about 5 years ago, I learned to focus alot more. I appreciate music and art much more now than I ever have, and with the added advantages of better grades and less paranoia, life is far more enjoyable. Have fun, good luck, and if it’s harder to quit than you thought it would be, feel free to e-mail me and talk about it, I got tons of tips :slight_smile:

14

I was a major stoner for about a decade, and I’ve been clean for five years. When I quit, I was on the verge of being homeless (again), broke, unemployed, carless, friendless, alone, and desperate.

Five years later I’m at the best job I’ve ever had, I have a great bunch of friends, I’m studying aikido, I’ve done a late night radio show for a couple of years, I’m madly in love with a great, solid guy, and I’m happier than I really know how to deal with.

I settled for being high for way too long. Now, instead, I’m happy.

And if you’ll excuse me, I have to go get my brand new Ida CD, put on the headphones loud, and paint.

Good luck with the quitting thing. Let me know if you need any help.

15

[DREAM MODE]
Don’t worry, Lucky Chaarms, some day, when people realize that cannabis is a harmless drug that makes alcohol look like rat poison, when they realize that most people are capable of using cannabis responsibly while still living a normal, productive life, when they realize that cannabis is about as addictive as a bag of potato chips, when they realize that an altered state of consciousness can be an emotionally and spiritually fulfilling experience, and when they finally come around to reforming our stupid, paternalistic drug laws, you’ll be vindicated.
[/DREAM MODE]

16

Yeah, don’t worry, Lucki. We’ll have you a Republican frat boy in no time.

17

Oh, Lucki, I feel for you. I’m totally dry right now. I have no money for more, and I still owe my connection for the stuff he gave me on credit on 9/11. I’ll stay this way until I get another steady job, just in case I have to pee in a cup, but when I have a job and money, I will be right back in it.

I am so sorry this happened to you. Your stupid so-called friend. I despise people who have that compulsion to say, “Hey man I’m stoned” to everyone around them. Because this is what happens.

{{{{{{Lucki}}}}}}

18

I went a few weeks ALMOST without smoking it recently - my main connection disappeared, my secondary connect couldn’t get any because of the tightened borders, and the other people I knew lived about 50 miles away. I say almost because about a week in I discovered I had some in my one-hitter (which lasted a few days), and then there was the weekend my stepdaughter’s father came to visit for the weekend and he had some.

Luckily I finally was able to score, and I got a decent amount so I will have time to find more.

19

Thanks for the sympathy, support, contempt, etc.

Today is my first appointment of 10 with the drug counsellor. I have no idea what I’m supposed to say to this guy, but I’ll try and get something out of it. He probably knows good ways to deal with it when you really want to burn. Heck, this guy could help a lot now that I think about it. Hmm.

College… only… 1.5 years… away… AAAAHHHHH!!!

Cranky: Circus Peanuts are always good, but they are about a billion times better when you’re high. Makes me sad, I have fond memories of trying to chew em when they’re hard and stale, and I’m really fucked. Tasty…

And to whoever asked, yes, the school can do this despite the fact that I am not on a sports team at the moment. It’s a private school, they set their own rules. I like this community too much to leave, it’s small and most of the students are cool. What really sucks is that thanks to our fabulous governor Dubya, if you get tested and it comes back positive, they report you and you get put on “the list” at the police department. It double pisses me off that I already told the school that I did it, and they’ve already assigned punishment, but it’s their policy that the test has to go through anyway. What, like I was lying about it? I hate all-encompassing policies like this, they seem to exist so that the faculty doesn’t have to think about individual cases, they can just blindly apply the policy. Blecch.

With Clear Eyes,

LC

20

Y’know, I have gone through many periods of being stoned every day. You may find there’s some stuff you were into when you were high that you don’t like anymore. On the other hand, stuff that’s good (like great music) is always good, and you don’t need pot to appreciate it. If, by the time you get to college you feel like getting high, go for it. But in the meantime, you can still have a great time and what’s more, you can find some new stuff to be interested in, and maybe work on getting into a college you will really like.

I know that when I was studying for the GRE, I found that if I didn’t smoke the night before, my scores improved markedly. Gave it up for a couple weeks, took the test, started up again. Then gave it up again to take the LSAT, and stopped completely later.

I still have the occasional toke (once in a blue moon) but I really don’t miss it much.

One time when I was in college, a bunch of us were studying in this glassed-in study center and suddenly the room was filled with beautiful light and we all turned to see the most incredible sunset we had ever seen. Someone piped in “I wish I was on 'shrooms,” and I thought “Dude, if you need drugs to appreciate a beautiful sunset, you’re in bad shape.” I still believe it. Drugs are fun, you’re not bad or wrong to appreciate them, but life is great with or without 'em, and they can really hold you back if you need 'em too much.

So, move on, don’t dwell on it. You have a long life ahead of you and plenty of time to do whatever you want. Consider it a vacation.