I often find myself wishing
That I could respond to posts in verse
Sometimes the desire is overwhelming but
I think it would piss people off
So I don’t do it.

Freqnuently, I want to make things rhyme
But find that I seldom have the time.

I’ve done this before
on another forum
a long time ago
it was fun
until someone
used the phrase
‘I’m a poet and I didn’t know it’
he was promptly flamed
I wonder if history shall repeat.


I’m a poet and didn’t…
ow! who threw that??

What do you think might be the point?
You’d be better off just rolling another joint.

Writing in verse is really pretty easy,
with time to rehearse and no fear of being cheesy.

The question really is
Do you need to rhyme
Or are you writing
In blank verse?

No more rhymes, I mean it!

Responding in verse?
There’s some things you just don’t do
That is one of them

In writing poems
I often find
I spend many hours
At a time
Yet what i think
It really is
Is starting new lines
Just like this

anybody want a peanut?

Can be free verse
If you just break it up into separate lines
Like this.

Instant poet!

So you say. But do you really mean
You find your thoughts much more
In rhyme?

Well, I’m agreed. No piss off here.


I don’t post in rhyme

But from time to time I have

Haikued quite badly

I adore free verse.
Something about the
fractured meter
Seems to echo how things work inside my head.

It makes me laugh.

If I
        hammer the
               space bar
or even
                return key

I'm the next e

It’s not often but I will admit here
That I’ll start writing a post that’s in meter
But I’ll spend so much time
Trying to think of a rhyme
That I say “Fuck it!” and hit the deleter.

If a man rhymes when
replying to others he’d
better be sure of his forum – I mean
for Cafe Society, Humble Opinion or
Mundane and Pointless Stuff,
verse can be keen.

But posting in General
Questions is different, as
rhyming your answer will
make folks look twice,
taking your words with a
dosage of salt that has
proven to cause
hypertension in mice.

Pitting in verse may be
lacking in gravitas:
(It is known that ring tones
on cell phones make you groan.)
And in Great Debates the
ayes will not have it as
two words that don’t rhyme
are “Bush” and “Capone.”

In short any poster who
waxes poetic
needs to be able to
chew what he bit.
Evocative imagery,
words most eidetic,
offer small chance he’ll be
labeled a wit.

There’s no verse so clever
you shouldn’t forego it
some killjoy will shout
(looking straight down his nose):
“Away from yon keyboard,
thou amateur poet,
posting on this board’s
best left to the prose!”

You are a great writer.

And you have way too much free time. :slight_smile:

Sadly, not true. The only hard part is, after you’re done, to quit thinking and talking in double dactyls all the time. Eventually, of course, someone will hit you hard enough to snap you out of the pattern, but ideally you want to break the habit before it comes to that.

For the Straight Dope, though, I suspect only trochaic tetrameter will do:

Cecil Adams, Straight Dope Maven,
Thought deep thoughts while he was shavin’
Of the need for Daylight Savin’
There’s a column worth engravin’
At his desk (so like a raven).

And thank you for the compliment.

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

–G.K. Chesterton