An open letter to Simon and Garfunkle:
You still sound great! I was probably as surprised as you two were when I saw your appearance on Letterman. But it’s about time to hang it up, fellas.
Art, I didn’t think you were capable of losing more hair. Your teeth are even more of an orthodontist’s wet dream. And you still do that funky thing with your mouth when you sustain a note.
Paul, you’ve become an 87-year-old Sicilian widow… minus the black dress. I didn’t think you could’ve gotten any smaller but you’re rapidly becoming a Pokeman. Did your guitar always look that big when you played?
You came back once and I’m still an afficianado of the Central Park Concert. I’ve even got it on DVD. But let’s face it, you’ve just about gotten enough mileage out of five studio albums.
Yes, you can still pack Madison Square Garden. And folks’ll stride past the gaming tables to see you in A.C. (even when tickets are going for better’n $250)
But, my friends, enough is enough. Someone has to tell you and it might as well be me… it’s time to quit.