When I went to high school in the 1960’s, every Friday and Saturday night there were local dances for teenagers. The format was usually records played by local DJ’s, and the music was 85-90% slow dancing with occasional faster rock and roll.
The idea, which still seems reasonable to me, was to be able to meet the girl, have an introductory conversation, and maybe, after several dances or several weeks, if you seemed to like each other, to perhaps ask her out.
Becoming single again, I realize that sometime over the years, the formats have become reversed. Dances at local clubs or singles events, now feature 90-95% faster dances, the music is so loud that conversation from 2-3 feet away is difficult or impossible, and by the end of the dance you’re lucky if you heard the other persons name correctly.
Isn’t the point of these things to meet someone? I like all types of dancing as much as anyone, but it seems that the format is counterproductive.
Does anyone else feel the same way? Who makes these decisions, anyway? Are formats different in places other than Massachusetts? I know Disco changed things somewhat in the '70’s, but real people produce these events. Do they ever question the purpose and desires of the attendees?
My first post; I hope it’s appropriate. Just interested to see what the general sentiment is out there.
Not all dances are ways to meet someone; some are just ways to have fun with folks you know. And others figure you’ll do the meeting in the bar over drinks, away from the dancefloor. If you like all kinds of dancing, I’d suggest saving clubdancing for just shaking your booty, and doing something like contradancing or swingdancing for the hooking-up thing.
I wasn’t allowed to date AT ALL so I fucking hated those slow dances, if you’ll excuse me. I would just stand against the wall, waiting for everyone to finish smooching and making out on the floor, until we could get back to the lively dancing.
Boy, that was a little bitter, wasn’t it? It wasn’t the most pleasant of experiences, but really, it doesn’t prey on me that much. I’m just glad they vary it much more nowadays.
In high school, I was the on-again-off-again boyfriend of a girl named Ellena, who also wasn’t officially allowed to date. Hmmm … “Ellena” … “Elenia” … um, you didn’t happen to go to high school in Santa Monica, didja?
It’s always been foreplay — it’s just that, after the Sexual Revolution, no one can pretend with a straight face that it isn’t.
Seriously, though, Left Hand of Dorkness is right – clubs aren’t necessarily intended to be hookup spots, or at least hookup spots for anything more than a one-night stand. You may want to check out other venues for getting to know people first.
Gruffy, welcome, and all that. Now, in order to meet attractive and (some of them) available young ladies in a quiet, pleasant, and non-threatening atmosphere may I suggest you saunter over to our MPSIMS forum? Innocently start a thread asking who is your favorite type, say, busty readhead, and it will suddenly fill with women each claiming to be the bustiest with the reddest hair. Then it escalates and photos get linked and then cat fights will break out in the Wesson oil pit and you’ll start regretting you even came here.
Lemme tell ya, there are worse ways to get indoctrinated here.
As far as teens go, there definitely isn’t the emphasis on one-on-one dating that used to exist and was fostered by dances (virtually no one brings a “date” to a dance, slow dances usually come at the end of the night). They can all dance together in a group at a club or school dance because they’ll all be leaving together at the end of the night, and from there they’ll pair off (or not).
Slow dancing is vertical sex. Always has been. In previous generations, it was one of the few ways that a couple could actually touch each other and it still be “proper”. Nowadays, most don’t care about “proper” and we dont’ need slow dancing when you’re having sex on the first date.
Back in the day, fast dancing was done without much touching, and slow dancing gave people the opportunity to touch, engage in “vertical foreplay” or whatever.
Now much of the shake-your-ass fast dancing is done crotch-to-crotch or crotch-to-ass in the clubs.
So which is more like sex: grinding your pelvises together at 120 beats per minute, or slowly swaying back and forth?
The thrill of touching each other while dancing is still there, it’s just been escalated to a much more provocative level.
And I really wasn’t allowed to date. I didn’t even have any on-again off-again boyfriends. I think their was some sort of barrier around me that guys could pick up on.
