Small crustaceans are out to get me.

I am the proud owner of two hermit crabs, Clea and Angua. They were both gifts, and they are the ideal dorm pet- low upkeep, non-smelly, and posessing cute buggy eyes. They enjoy climbing on everything and have a “Fuck you! I have a shell!” attitude that I can only admire. “What’s that, Clea? There’s a steep drop an inch away? Fuck it! I have a shell! Dyaaa!”

Lately, however, I’m beginning to think that they are out to get me. Cases in point:

  1. They have become more demanding. Clea and Angua tend to spend a lot of time inside their shells. They are restless at the moment, however- they will often go to the corners of their cages with their accusatory eyes, demanding that I release them from their confines so that they may walk off the edges of furniture with reckless impunity. Their eyes are cute and buggy, but at times… there seems to be some menace.

  2. One afternoon I went to play with them and found Angua huddled in a corner, sans shell. I thought she was dead, but she started to move.

A hermit crab ass is an interesting sight.

In a bit of a panic, I arranged all of my empty shells around her in hopes that she would pick one. She proceeded to examine all of the shells in excruciating detail and go headfirst into one. She remained headfirst in it for three hours with her blue hermit crab ass hanging out.

To make matters worse, she proceeded to switch shells 4 times in the next week, eventually ending up in the shell that she left in the first place.

  1. Yesterday I saw Angua on top of Clea’s shell. I moved Angua and then picked up Clea.

Half of her body fell out.

I screamed “Gah!,” jumped, and proceeded to burst into tears for a few minutes.

Then I examined the remains more closely and realized that she’d just molted and was indeed alive.

Clea’s very pink at the moment and seems to be mocking me from across the room.

With those damn buggy eyes.

But how do they taste with butter sauce and lemon?

jayjay (running…very quickly)

My hermit crabs were named Fang and Slobber. Then they died.

awwww… Aren’t those things cute. I used to have about five of them. Does one of yours pick on the other until it starts crying? They make an odd litte chirping noise when they get upset. Neat little guys.

Well, anyway… I’m sure they aren’t out to get you, so just sit back and enjoy them

Same thing happened to me! During a commercial break from the X-files, no less. It was very traumatic.

And yes, I know what you mean about the accusatory eyes. Do you ever give them showers? If not, that could be why. They love to be misted with warm water at least every other day. Mine stopped giving those evil glances after I discovered this.

Or better yet, take em in the shower with you.

Heh heh…andygirl has crabs…heh heh…

:: D&R::


Hermit crabs are the Devils Pubic Lice. I’ve seen the pinchers bring a grown adult to their knees… literally. I have seen a rather sizeable chunk of tissue removed from a finger of the same kneeling person.

And the smell the dead ones make… gack.

I water my hermit crabs daily. I am a Conscious Pet Owner [sub]TM[/sub]

Whammo, they are kind and gentle critters if you treat them right. They can get really big (I’ve seen one about the size of a softball) but still, calling them the Devil’s Pubic Lice is a bit much. They are, at best, the Devil’s mosquitos.

Gunslinger, face not my evil wrath, for I will call to the crustacean kingdom and have a lobster affixed to your naughty bits.

Ha! I had two hermit crabs when I was 7yo. I took them to school for Show and Tell and released them on the floor where they did their hermit crabby thing. Most of the girls (and some of the guys) lifted their feet and screamed like little girls are wont to do.

It was hilarious.

Maybe you had to be there.

Ohh! I want hermies!!

Andygirl- You’re a college student, aren’t you? I’m going to be one in about a year and a half…hmm…maybe I should get some too. Hehehe…and then I could unleash wave after wave of hermit crab on unsuspecting prof…But enough. I pratter on.

They sound super cute to me. How did you name them?

Angua was a graduation present from a few of my friends. She’s named after my favorite Terry Pratchett character, Angua. (She’s a werewolf cop who’s incredibly beautiful. And dangerous. What’s not to like?)

Clea was an 18th birthday gift. I had just read an interview of Clea DuVall, and I liked the name.

Well, see, what you gotta do is get this special shampoo, lather up, invite your friends over for cocktails, hang out for 15 minutes, jump back in the shower, and…

Whoops! Wrong crabs! :o ( :wink: )

[Emily Litella Voice]Never mind![/Emily Litella Voice]


[sub]P.S. Thanks for cracking me up. “Fuck it! I have a shell! Dyaaa!” :D[/sub]

Great! Pet Rocks!