Maybe it’s not a mystery to anyone but me. Or maybe it’s a mystery to everyone and folks can only conjecture (in which case, if there’s no solidly right answer, this will probably end up in IMHO or even MPSIMS). I’m talking about chained-up bicycles in Manhattan whereby a surprisingly (to me) high percentage of them have one wheel bent in a curve like a Pringle’s potato chip.
Unlikely Scenario A: Aaaaugh, I’m riding my bike and some damnfool in an automobile has just struck me and actually ran over my bike. Umm, I’m all right, just bounced along the pavement and left some armbones behind. Yes I’ll get into the ambulance in just a moment, but first I have to chain my bike to that lamp post.
Unlikely Scenario B: Hey, let’s fuck up that guy’s bike, ya wanna? Here, you watch in case he comes back, and I’ll just put this portable 3 foot wide vise around the wheel and pinch it until it bends in a smooth arc like that, heh heh, looks wicked don’t it?
Unlikely Scenario C: When, I say when, will the modern city start respecting bicyclists and care about our safety? Oooh, I know how to raise public awareness about how so many of us get hit and injured or killed while riding! You know those people who go to the trouble of painting bike victims’ bikes white and putting up a memorial sign and flowers and all that shit? Well I figured we’d do that too but we’ll just put the damaged bike not bother with the flowers and paint and plaque, everyone will know what the chained ruined bike means. Oh, and we’l only include the bikes that were hit at the wheel, not those where the handlebars got run over or something…