Nothing major like you been lying about cancer to get a promotion but something smaller like you been lying about liking the Dixie Chicks to get your promotion.
Other examples include taping your tie to your shirt so it won’t swing around and keeping poems on some small electronic device and then pretending to remember them by heart.
I spend the whole day studying at home and the rest of the time either working or working out. I tell everyone that I play video games and drink vodka all day long so that they won’t make fun of me for having no life (apparently vodka and video games is a life.) They are all baffled when they see my grades.
It was a small company, in trouble, so I got in cheap. I didn’t buy the whole thing, just enough (25% of the outstanding stock) so that I (and an ally) could work our way with the Board, fire the then-current Pres., and replace him with myself.
I sold it last January to an investor who promptly fucked it over. C’est la vie.
Actually, I get a lot more enjoyment by NOT cheating.
The way I see it, one day I’ll be on my deathbed looking back at my life, and I want to be able to say I walked through the world with my head up, dealt with people fairly, and in general was an asset to the human race. I’m not interested in cutting corners and compromising my integrity to gain whatever small advantages I can.
If I pretended to know a poem that I read off a ‘cheat sheet’, it would just make me feel like a phony. I certainly wouldn’t feel good about it, even if it got me a date or a job.
Or as the immortal Willie Nelson said in Thief: “Lie to no one. If someone is close to you, you’ll ruin it with a lie. If they’re a stranger, who the fuck are they that you have to lie to them?”
I don’t cheat in life…well, except this one time my brother super-glued five pennies together making them useless. I slipped them into a penny roll. I also play the High Asking Price game when selling a car, knowing my purchasers will try to lowball me, giving me the price I really wanted in the end.
But games are easier to cheat on. I am even more opposed to cheating at games than I am to cheating at things that affect the outcome of life, as the point of the game is to win within the rules. But there are instances where the design of the game encourages cheating to the point that I feel it is my duty as a gamer to cheat. For instance, when playing a tabletop miniature game on a table, when measuring ranges one has to “eyeball” it and hope your weapons is in range. But when you play on a tiled floor, the number of tiles to your target, along with the size of each tile and some simple Pythagorean approximations can tell you the distance to your target within an inch or so. If they’d only cover the floor with felt I’d be able to resist the temptation
(sorry if this devolves into a “Games Cheating” thread.)
My grocery has bunches of bananas for 79 cents a pound, and loose bananas $1/bag or about 25c/lb. Sometimes they have plenty of loose bananas, but no markdown bags visible. So, just in case, I bring the bag from the last time and load it myself. Sort of cheating, except I’m sure if I asked a clerk to make up a bag for me he would.
I think I know what you’re talking about with the tabletop game. I would do things like that too. My friend for the life of him couldn’t understand how I would be landing Guess range weapons so accurately, when in fact I was using terrain as a reference to estimate distance.
Lakai, who, exactly would be be cheating? Well, I mean, besides yourself.
The tricks you describe, are more disguises for insecurity and callow youth. Some, you’ll look back on, and slap your forehead. Others, like bragging about drinking you don’t do, will leave you embarrassed and chagrined, wondering who you were trying to impress.
The more “dirty little secrets” you burden yourself with, the longer you’ll feel small and cheap.
Do you think other people sit in their houses until one day, life knocks on the door and invites them out to play? If you want a life, go live one!
Get aquainted with the love of your life… You!
“Above all else to thine ownself be true.” If you choose to take responsibility for your actions, you won’t have to hide behind your silly taped up tie. Internalize your focus. Right now, you seem to be living externally. The rest of the world gets the best , while you take the leavings. Don’t you deserve more? You are the driver. One day you’ll suddenly realize you are where you are, in life, by mistake. That, or you’ll be convinced that you cheated your way into whatever position you you’re in, and that you’ll soon be caught out. Almos everyone feels the
Stop cheating, stop hiding. Stop forming future regrets.
And I’m not beating you up, even if you feel like I have. I’m old, I’m just bestowing wisdom. :rolleyes:
Nobody ever notices the “credit card only” MetroCard machines, even the people who pay by credit card. I never point this out as I make a beeline to them.
Ordering your fast food item with one tiny modification gets you the next one, fresh and hot.
Tip your waitress the minimum on your credit card and make up the difference in cash. That way, they still meet the IRS standard for wage/tip amount, and get some sweet unreportable income, for which they will thank you.
You should ask my in-laws, as they are experts at this sort of thing. SIL is a diabetic, and she’s told me how easy it is to pull the “diabetes card” when waiting too long for a table at a restaurant…just tell the host/hostess you’re diabetic and need to eat now, and bang you get the next table. Now, this would really be cheating if you were to say that and you were not diabetic!
People are impressed when you say you drink vodka and play video games all day? :dubious: Are you sure that they are not walking away, shaking their heads, and thinking, “How sad!” 'Cause, that’s what I’d be thinking.
When watching or listening to stand-up comedians I make it a point to remember some of the funnier lines/jokes. I then rework them and pass them off to friends as if I came up with them on the spot.
My wife knows about this and is all too eager to rat me out in front of others when I get a laugh. “He’s not really that funny you know. He’s just using everyones jokes he hears on the tv and radio.”
When you’re in a traffic jam on the highway… use the offramps but instead of turning, go straight through and use the onramp. This will allow you to skip a few dozen cars.
See, I don’t understand why someone wouldn’t just say they liked the poem and copied it down so they’d have it with them. What’s wrong with that? People really complicate life sometimes.
