I’ve known people who’ve regretted not going. Only women, though, never guys. Oh, and what do you consider an “incredibly high” volume of prom skippers? About 1/3 of my classmates didn’t go. I think they missed out, but who knows.
If any of your classmates are going to be “grind [their] pelvic bone[s] into the other person” your school is a hell of a lot less uptight than mine was. That sort of thing seems more common while clubbing than while being chaperoned by your math teacher.
I went because everyone kept telling me that if I didn’t, I’d regret it forever.
I went, and it was stupid. I would have rather stayed home and played Trivial Pursuit. I say, if you don’t want to go, don’t go.
Ditto. I didn’t even go to my own graduation and I don’t regret it one bit. Don’t regret not going to prom, either.
Don’t get me wrong - there were things I absolutely loved about high school, and some of the most fun I’ve ever had happened during those years - but I don’t look back and take any of it seriously. I’m only 26 and 14-18 (high school age) already seems really young to me. Like Siam Sam I can hardly imagine regretting something about those years.
Another person who didn’t go and has no regrets. My school had a prom for every year, Freshmen prom, Sophomore prom. Sucked the novelty out of senior prom. Plus, wasn’t anyone there I was particularly going to miss. Stayed home and made nookie cookies with the now Husband instead. Much better.
ETA: for the OP: Once you’re out of your parent’s house, make an effort to develop a social network or two. In high school, everyone is annoying so it’s better to be on your own. In college and beyond, you start to feel like you’re broken and somehow unlovable. Much crapiness. And stick with it. There are some folks out there who are really cool, but it might take some looking to find them.
If you don’t go, there’s a barrel of pig’s blood goin’ a wastin’ 
Said girlfriend reporting - and I found this on my own because the title jumped out at me. Yeah, I do sort of wish I’d gone. It was only a year ago, but most of my female friends have great pictures, a frivolous dress (the last one parents bought them, no less 
), and a few good stories to tell. It’s not a huge regret, but it’s symbolic of how I excluded myself from many opportunities my last semester of high school.
My parents didn’t go to theirs, either, because she was younger and they got married soon after she graduated, so she didn’t see the point in doing both. My mom wanted me to go to mine, though, and my sophomore sister has been to all her Homecomings and Winter Dances and is much more likely to go to at least one prom.
ETA: But I’m doing better in college and I think it’ll be less important to me as time goes on. I’m just at the stage where some now-college friends are going with younger dates to this year’s prom, or use last year’s photo from it as their Facebook profile photo still.
I didn’t go and I don’t regret it. My crowd was very anti-prom. The cost, the artificial importance placed on it, the subtle social outcast system that is so painful for so many people. What the fuck.
I am, however, a reunion person. I absolutely LOVED seeing people who were casual acquaintances as well as those I hung out with. My 35th is next year and I’m definitely going.
If you don’t want to go, skip it.
I went…and all I remember was that it cost a lot and it was a major let-down.
To be quite honest, I can’t remember much about it other than a bunch of pictures (that I later destroyed…has to do with powder-blue tux and bad hair) and that was about it.
Now that you mention it, it took me about five minutes to remember who I even took to the prom.
Trust me…missing it will not cause you to go into therapy later in life.
IMO, regret is too strong a word. I think some day you might say: I wish I hadn’t skipped the prom.
But you won’t feel it in your soul and it won’t affect the quality of your life. It is a small footnote in a person’s life. I wouldn’t put too much undue time into thinking about it.
Yet another person here who happily skipped with no regrets. So did a bunch of my friends. Honestly the only thing that possibly tempted me would have been going in Bondage gear or Ren faire costumes. You know if this is your kind of thing. It wasn’t mine, so I didn’t go. You’ll have to judge.
I went and having gone will say I would have happily skipped it. I sure wouldn’t regret not having gone. It’s was all so about parents, spending money and taking pictures.
I went and really enjoyed it. It was a chance to hang out in a posh hotel, drink free alcohol and hang out with my friends. But if it’s just not your kind of thing, then I doubt you’ll be missing anything if you decide to skip it.
My mother actually regrets going, in a way. Her sister-in-law, (my Aunt Ginna), insisted she go, because it was The Prom. So she fixed Mom up with her own little brother, who Mom barely knew. She said it was pretty awkward and boring. (The dress she had though, was gorgeous).
Okay, this is a wee bit confusing to parse:
-I would have gone had most of my friends been doing so.
-The only friend who WAS going, was going with a group of people I couldn’t stand.
-I, did have a few friends from work I could’ve gone with, however:
-You weren’t allowed to go stag, with just a group of friends, and most of my other
But honestly, the only thing I really regret, in a way, is being able to get the dress. I love prom dresses and fashion in general.
(Holy run-on-sentences, Batman!)
I went to 4 proms and had a good time at all of them. Your situation may be entirely different, though, and if you have no real desire to go, I say forget it.
I had a good time, but each one is a few hours of my life that I never think about.
Jragon, as another airmchair psychologist, I say you shouldn’t go. A prom is a social event with quite a lot of social pressure. There are many ways and reasons to feel unhappy at or about a prom.
You wrote:
If I read that, I’d say going to a prom and actually enjoying is is far too big a step from your position. (You are probably lot better at entertaining yourself then most of the prom goers would be, but that is a whole 'nuther subset of skills the the social skills I mentioned ).
On the other hand, I would advise you to widen your social circle, as it sounds like you already regret it is as small as it is. But do it with baby steps. Find people who like doing what you also like doing anyway.
Going to a prom, where the chief entertainment is group gossip and sharing group school memories, dressing up and flirting is a far, far too great step outside of your comfort zone. You probably won’t enjoy it and it will only make you feel more like an outsider, so why on earth should you subject yourself to going?
If I were you, I would try and do something special and a bit social that night that you would like doing. Is there, in your town, some social gathering connected to a hobby you have? Some internet event? Some group event where single people who don’t know each other can sign up for? Some relative you can look up?
Go dammit!
Tell the DJ to make a celebratory announcement about your impending fatherhood.
Shakes the cages!
Also, you should start a thread sponsoring hiring a hooker to go with you. And let everyone know it’s a hooker. I struck out 0 for 2, but everyone expects you to get there on Prom night. Walk in with your head high the next day my friend.
**
Disclaimer**: Never listen to advice from bbs2k ever. Ever, ever, ever.
I didn’t go. I don’t like dancing, dressing up, or the opposite sex. I don’t regret it.
Seemed to me (like to many in this thread) as a pointless waste of time and effort. I recall a buddy who wandered around in a panic (broke up with his long-time GF about 2 months before) trying to find a date for the thing; didn’t want to stoop that desperately low, nor did I have any interest in what was basically a overblown stereotypical mating ritual. The M/F ratio in my school skewed heavily male anyway, and the one person I would have even dared to consider (another school)-well her parents hated me so that was that.
It didn’t even register on my radar.
The only thing I miss is the epic-sounding party everyone went to afterwards.
It was only epic if you were there. The damn band woke me up at 1am. ‘Epic’ is not the word I would use to describe that.
(Different party of course. My mood not being helped by hating the guts of the guy throwing it.)
I went to my prom, didn’t go to any after-party, and while I don’t regret going, I don’t think I would have regretted not going either. Frankly, even then there was a part of me that was just happy to be the hell out of high school