I have this one friend. I’ve known him since the 1st Grade. We’ve been having variations on the same argument since then.
Him: This is the only 6th Grade dance you’ll ever have. If you don’t go you’ll never have the chance again. I’m going because I’m afraid that I’ll regret not going.
Me: Meh. 6th Grade dances are lame. I have no interest in it and I’m sure I won’t regret it.
Replace “6th Grade dance” with every thing from “Prom” to “20th High School reunion” and you get the picture. He goes to all of them and tells me that “it wasn’t so bad and I’m glad I went” and I continue to have no regrets about missing any of them. If you only want to go because you fell like you’ll regret it if you don’t and the idea of actually going makes you feel uncomfortable, just skip it.
I do feel bad about one aspect of missing Prom. I had a Physics as my last class on the Friday before Prom. There were these two girls in the class with me that I had known since grade school. Both were intelligent, attractive and very, very nice young ladies.
They walked into class together and the teacher asked them if they were going to Prom. They said that they weren’t going and the (idiot) teacher asked then why they were skipping it. They told him that no one asked them. Awkward.
After class the teacher had a brain fart and told them, “Bye. Enjoy Prom tomorrow.” Again they told him they weren’t going and again he asked them why. Sigh. I felt so bad for them and kind of wished I had asked one of them to go with me. I don’t know. They may well have not wanted to go with me in the first place but they so nice and didn’t deserve to not be asked.
I didn’t go and don’t particularly regret it. I had a great time in high school and plenty of friends, but I wasn’t very big into the dance scene. I went to some dances and had fun, skipped others and it wasn’t a big deal. Prom just happened to be in the second category. I’d say if dances are something you could take or leave in general, there’s no reason to treat prom any differently.
I skipped mine, just because I didn’t care for being told when and where I was supposed to have a good time. My best friend had failed a year and so wasn’t graduating with me and couldn’t go. I’m a happier person when I do things because I really want to, not when I feel I am supposed to. I was and am pretty apathetic about the whole thing, though. Go with your gut.
Oh, right, mine was almost 12 years ago, now. I don’t regret it. I skipped everything, and would have skipped the graduation, too, but my mother insisted I do something. So, I strolled in with a guy upon which I wished no direct harm, sat and sweated through the long, incredibly boring ceremony, and sang “Postman Pat” to myself.
I went, mostly because OMGOMG-the-guy-I’ve-had-a-crush-on-FOREVER!1!!one11!! was my date. I wasn’t a big fan of high school, and I knew that this would be just like any other high school dance (only with fancier outfits).
The venue was a terrible throw-back to the 70s, the food was disgusting, the music was bad enough to make even a seasoned wedding DJ cringe, my mother vetoed my choice to wear a Victorian dress of my own creation at the last minute because apparently I would live to regret it, and I was a pukey mess by the end of the night because I got food poisoning from the chicken.
But I managed to find a gorgeous vintage 50s gown in blue silk that mother approved of, hung out with two of my best friends for most of the night, had a blast dancing like an idiot, and spent most of the night floating on air because my crush had finally asked me out. And at the end of the night, he went from crush to OMG-I’m-in-love when he insisted on kissing me goodnight, pukey breath and all (we went on to date for four years after that and are still in touch these days).
If I had to do it all over again, I’d still go… and I’d wear the damn Victorian gown, mother’s opinion be damned.
Regret what? Going to your prom or the experience you will have there. Remember, you can always turn around and go back. Go, and then go to a nice restaurant with a group (or your date) instead.