So, I'm plugged into The Matrix: Sounds good to me!

Welcome to the Matrix debates. I, of course, am the charming and articulate Inky. My opponant is the somewhat inarticulate surfer guy Keeanu Reeves – er, that is to say Neo and our moderator for the evening is, inexplicably, Sinistar.

Sinistar: Beware, I live! I hunger!!

Inky: Quite. So Keeanu…

Neo: It’s “Keanu”.

Inky: Yeah, whatever Keershaw. So, in the matrix I get virtual steak twice a week. Have a nice virtual apartment with clean virtual sheets and I ocassionally get some virtual nookie. Granted, it involves an unrewarding virtual job, but how is that any different from life in “The Real World”? As far as I can tell, working in The Real World involves hazardous duty on funky space-hovercraft or Robotech-inspired gunner thingies.

Neo: Your free, dude! Free from the machines! Free too…

Inky: - free to live a sunless subterranian existance like some cliff-dwelling indian, eating ‘synthetic single-cell proteins, vitamins and minerals’, not to mention the crappy hippy-ass loom woven clothes. What’s the big payoff eh?

anybody care to take over?

Neo: Whoah.

Neo: Well, dude man, you get like, to mack on chicks!

S & S: Trinity’s hardly what I’d call a chick myself, but hey! whatever turns you into an amorphous blob that we can only guess whats what on.

Neo: Woah! You guys were filming that?