Gee, I wonder what race they were.
Pretty sure I can guess what race you are.
Haaa! Hahaaa! I like The Big C, but I never saw that episode. That kills me. Sapphire pulled an ‘Andrea’ on all yall white folks.
When you put it all in a list like that, you’re right, this is just too much.
I mean, how does she even know your mother?
Hahaaaa! shantih, you know what I meant!
I agree that it was an over-the-top horror movie. Monique’s character stopped being believable, like, ten minutes into the thing.
But the inspirational aspect of the movie was clear to me. Yeah, we’re supposed to root for Precious and her crazy dreams. But really what touched me was that there were so many people trying to help her. The principal at her school. Mariah Carey. Lenny Kravitz. Her teacher and even her crazy classmates. It wasn’t really a testament of Precious’s strength as much as the power of community. If it hadn’t been for those people, the girl wouldn’t have had any hope at all.
One thing I couldn’t ignore. Why did all the good guys have to be light-skinned?
Michael Scott liked the books on tape version of the novelization of “Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”
And beautiful, and thin . . . that all bothered me too.
No. They made a stink when the local Super market wouldn’t make them a cake for little Adolph Hitler. But they were allowed to name him that. The kid was later taken away but not because of his name. They were from the next town over when I was married and I saw them at my kids doctors office.
Haven’t read the book or seen the movie. However, on the topic of whether that much could happen to one person, some of the thing on that list tend to predispose the victim to other ones. For example, being poor is a risk factor for abuse. Being physically abused increases risk of being sexually abused. Worst of all, being sexually abused is a significant risk factor for being sexually abused by a second perpetrator. For example, I have one client who was first abused by an uncle, then her biological father, then a neighbor.
Why does this happen? My best explanation is that once someone has been abused, it can change the victim’s personality and behavior in ways that perpetrators can sense. One way, for example, is that the victim learns to act seductively, or believes that she is worthless. Another factor is that neglect or in attention by parents can be a part of the first abuse, and then continues. Abuse by both parents is unfortunately common, and makes sense when you realize that these people married one another, after all.
Substance abuse is often both the result of abuse and then contributes to further abuse. STDs? What, you think a users use condoms? Obesity is associated with low self esteem, which is a risk factor for abuse. Of course, that can go the other way, with abuse leading a victim to overeat.
Bottom line: abuse is not randomly distributed, and contributes to further abuse. This leads to some pretty sad, and perhaps hard to believe, stories.
Brynda, you are right. I agree with all that you have said. That is why I’m not surprised when I meet someone who is fat and abused and drug addicted and riddled with STDs. Those kinds of stories aren’t at all hard to believe for me.
Why do I get the feeling I am missing something?
I’m saying I agree with what you said, but what you said doesn’t explain the Precious story. The Precious story is TOOOOOOOO over the top for your explanation to apply.
And if I’m being honest, I’m saying that anyone who believes that story is plausible is easily manipulated by people like Sapphire. Sapphire knew that there would be those who honestly believed that Precious story goes down in inner city black neighborhoods all the time, so she had no problem exploiting that.
It is one thing to say ‘abusers don’t use condoms’ but it is another to act as if it was common for kids to get AIDS through heterosexual sex in the 80s. Has that happened, ever? Sure. But it hasn’t happened in concert with all those other horrors. That is poverty porn and it’s silly.
What if the sex is likely to involve lacerations?
Probably still unlikely, because the abuser was probably not at high risk for contracting it in the first place.
But let’s say he was. Let’s say he was a gay iv drug user. And let’s say he abused Precious and she got AIDS. I can buy that.
And let’s say that he got her knocked up. Hmm. Ok. I will buy that.
Now let’s say he got her knocked up TWICE. Hm. Ok. I buy that.
Now let’s say the poor baby came out with Downs. Hm. Ok. She seems young and less likely to have a Downs baby, but it’s certainly possible. I buy that.
Now let’s say her mom SEXUALLY abuses her too. Whoa. It happens, but…
Now let’s say the abuse level was to the extreme of stomping her head as she gives birth… Holy fuck…
Now let’s say…you know what. I’ve made my point. Dozens of times concerning this movie on these boards. If I’m tired of hearing me go on about it, surely everyone else is too. If you want to believe the Precious story is something that happens in real life then I will just laugh at you like I do everyone else who buys it. I don’t know what else to say.
Guess you haven’t seen the clients I have. Replace Downs with another birth defect (because, like you said, she is young for that. Maybe something caused by poor maternal care, since I doubt she had that) and it would be one of the sadder stories I have heard, but not unbelievable.
I had a client who had a bipolar, substance abusing mom who gave custody to dad. Dad was pedophile, so that was a bad decision. She starred in lots of photos and got shared to his friends. He was sent to jail, she went to live with mom. Physically and sexually abused by stepdad. Date raped. Ran away. Got married…to abusive man. Divorced. And here’s the weirdest part: in her late teens, she returned to dad, who was out by then. she says it was to protect her younger brother, but I wonder. in any case, their relationship resumed for a few years, until she moved away when brother moved iut. Quiet decade or so, aside from her own substance abuse, leading to heart disease and a heart attack. Recently forcibly sodomized by boyfriend and hospitalized for suicide attempt. She’s in her early forties. Nzinga, you will be happy to know she is as white as white can be.
I get that you think the book is perpetuating racist stereotypes. I don’t know what the author’s intentions were. All I do know is that sad stories do exist, and that abuse is not randomly distributed.
You think the person you have described compares to the Precious story?
Yes, I do.
- Multiple (certainly more than a dozen) sexual abusers as a child
- Some of whom don’t know each other
- Rape by yet another person
- Substance abuse
- Heart disease
- Another rape
- Suicide attempts
- Mentally ill mom (almost forgot)
- Returned to dad
Look, I just don’t like to see you in your fight about your issue (racism) to cause problems for my issue (people not believing victims). The only thing worse that suffering multiple abuse is suffering through it and having someone call you a liar. Hey, to be fair, if I were writing a book, I wouldn’t use my client’s story. It is just too over he top to make believable fiction. Doesn’t make it less true.
Ok, well I think I see precisely where we disagree. I don’t see your case anywhere near as unbelievable as Precious’ story. The case you describe doesn’t seem unbelievable to me, I know cases that are comparable
And I don’t know what you mean by my fight getting in the way of people not believing victims. If I knew a real live Precious, I would believe her story. There would be evidence of her story in front of me, for starters. I don’t like the implication that I would not believe a victim just because I don’t believe a clearly fictitious story by an exploitive author.
I made the leap from (paraphrasing) “precious’ story is unbelievable” to “I wouldn’t believe a story like that from a real person.” It appears I was wrong, and I apologize. Almost every sad story I hear has people in it who didn’t believe the victim, so I get defensive on their behalf.