I tend to agree with the OP and with madmonk. If I’m reading I’m already doing something I want to do. I’m not bored and I don’t need you to entertain me. And I don’t really feel any need to stop what I’m doing so I can entertain you.
One of the weirdest experiences I ever had happened about 7 years ago.
I was waiting for a bus, sitting on a bench, reading a book. A young lothario decided to make his move and starting asking what I was reading, why was I reading it, etc. He was quite put out when I explained that I was reading it for fun and not because I was taking a class or something.
He was REALLY put out when I explained that I was in my 30s and not actually interested in dating a 16 year old.
Bizarre. However, that’s the only time I can think of that I’ve been interrupted reading. People will strike up a conversation when I’m knitting all the time though; however, unless you’re counting it’s totally possible to knit and talk at the same time thus making this point completely irrelevant to the OP. Uh, oops.
Carry on - enjoy your book.
To me it’s like barging up to strangers who are obviously in deep conversation and saying “Hey! whatchoo guys talkin’ about?”.
Though perhaps Hamlet does that too…
Either because I’m a man, or because I just give off unfriendly vibes, I hardly ever have this problem.
Wait - maybe it’s because I don’t read in public too often. Although when I did commute by train, we were all equally surly and anti-social.
Once again the protagonist of “The Princess and the Pea” is shocked and confused by the tiny inconsequential things that irritate some SDMB posters.
I had some bloody irritating guy who kept on asking me questions about the book I was reading while I was washing my clothes at the laundrette a bit ago. I can thoroughly endorse this pitting.
Ridiculous. Why should I prioritize a stranger over my choice of entertainment? I get plenty of human interaction from people I actually give a damn about, TYVM.
Reading a book is not an invitation for conversation. When I “reach my stride” while reading, I stop being conscious of reading the words and become immersed. When someone interrupts me (and it often takes more than one attempt), I lose that immersion.
I know for many people, reading is a chore and difficult, so they might assume you need a break. Of course, if you’d put in the work early on, you’d find the task less difficult now.
It’s particularly annoying when I read at lunch. For some reason the people sitting alone with nothing else to do decide to make you their “book”.
I’m just curious about the usage of the term “passive aggressive.”
If THIS is passive aggressive
How do you characterize THIS?
“Your obituary, you stupid cunt!”
- is a possible answer.
Well, at least it’s better than the question Bill Hicks said he was once asked: “Hey, mister, what are you reading *for *?”
Wait a minute. I heard that a great way to pick up women was to ask about the book they are reading. You know, show some interest in what they are doing. Is that incorrect? Should I go back to asking them what their sign is?
I’m going to amend my answer a little bit. It’s one thing if a stranger in a restaurant asks me what I’m reading. However, if I’m at work, and clearly need that break from talking to people, but some clueless co-worker always comes up and wants to chat, despite me explaining that I’d like to use my break as a break from people…then I get the Urge To Kill.
It’s boundary issues, really. Some people enjoy being talked to in public, some don’t. Some people, when meeting an online friend for the first time, will prefer not to be touched. Others go right in for a hug and possibly kiss. The thing is, if you try to initiate some sort of interaction, you also have to accept the fact that someone might not want to interact with you, and be prepared to leave that person alone.
When I was younger, in my teens and twenties, I had a lot of guys who tried to pick me up while I was reading in public. Thing is, they weren’t interested in what I was reading, they were only interested in getting me to talk to them and possibly having sex with them. THIS is what I found objectionable. On the other hand, I was willing to talk about what I was reading.
To me, there’s a difference between real curiosity about what I’m reading, and someone who simply wants me to entertain them without regards to whether I want to interact with them.
And I swear that **shiftless **snuck in that post while I was typing. Yeah, asking me what I was reading as a pickup technique failed, unless the guy asking me was actually able to fake an interest in my answer.
Depends on the circumstances. Woman with book, clearly engrossed in what she’s reading = don’t bother. Woman with book, frequently looking around, fidgeting, glancing at other people = go for it.
From there, proceed thusly. Generic answer, like “A mystery” or “Words” = not interested in talking to you. Somewhat warmer answer along the lines of “Barnaby X. Authorton’s latest thriller. Have you read those?” = you’re now stuck deciding whether to BS your way through it by pretending to be interested or admit you’ve never heard of the man in your life and risk getting cock-blocked. An enthusiatic answer in the vein of “It’s Cosmopolitan’s Comprehensive List of Every Sex Technique EVAH Guaranteed to Make A Grown Man Cry For His Mommy While Cumming LIke a Howitzer!” followed by whipping off her glasses, loosening her prissy bun, unbuttoning her blouse, and growling like a tigress = she just might be amenable to a cup of coffee or a walk in the park.
So faking an interest worked with you? About how often, would you say? Would Penthouse Forum be interested?
I was waiting to see my doctor last month and had brought a book with me because I don’t like reading months-old copies of crappy magazines. It was a thick book - 700+ pages. The receptionist passed by: “Wow, that’s a big book!”
Me: “Yup! Sure is! Taking me a while to get through it.”
“You must like reading, huh?”
“I do, actually.”
“So, you gonna read *all *of that?” :dubious:
“No, I’m planning on stopping halfway through just so I could waste my own time and save you the bother!”
Of course I didn’t say that, but it really was kind of a silly question.
My parents are extreme extroverts who view any silence in a room as a social failure on their part. I love 'em to death, but if you ever pick up a book or magazine in their house you get conversationally tag-teamed (and they’re not asking about the book). It is literally impossible to read in their presence.
This is actually a source of amusement for me and the wife. One of us will subtly signal the other, then pick up a book, and the other starts timing the “seconds to interruption”. It’s almost always < 60 seconds.
Oddly enough, I’m never bothered while reading in waiting rooms or on planes.
Beat them to death with your book, is the only acceptable answer I have ever found, except then you get blood in the pages.
I fully endorse this OP. I’m not particularly social, but I will socialize in appropriate situations, but when I’m reading, I’m reading, dammit, not looking for idle chatter.