So who wants to join me for Planes, Trains and Automobiles?

You wouldn’t think, would you, that anyone who despises Th- Br–kf-st Cl-b as much as I do would make a tradition of watching another J-hn H-gh-s movie. But Mr. Rilch turned me on to Planes, Trains and Automobiles years ago, and we always, but always, watch it on Thanksgiving. We’re going to my parents’ place this year, and I hope to be able to talk them into letting us play it, and watching it with us.

Friend says the reason I find it likeable is because in this case, the director was dealing with his own generation, rather than projecting his ideals onto ours. It’s absolutely John Candy’s finest moment. Mr. Rilch and I even named two of our stuffed animals after the characters: a cheerful, rotund elephant is Del, and a stubborn eagle is Neil.

“Ah, they can buff that out no problem!”

“What d’you think the temperature is?”

“…One?”

“You didn’t pay for it with shower curtain rings!”

“Yep, those are the precious moments. They don’t come back!”

“You have to DISCRIMINATE! You CHOOSE things that—that are FUNNY! Or—or MILDLY AMUSING! You’re a miracle! Your stories have NONE of that!”

“You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better…I’m an easy target. Yeah, I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you. But I don’t like to hurt peoples’ feelings. You can say what you like about me; I’m not changing. Me…I like me. My wife likes me. My customers like me. 'Cause with me, I’m the real article. What you see is what you get.”

:::snif:::

I swear, last year, Mr. Rilch, Friend and I were having T’giving leftovers. I was wearing a flimsy skirt, and sitting underneath the “join” in the table where you can insert a leaf. I shifted my legs, and the skirt caught on the edge. Rippppppp. I got up, inspected the tear, and said, as they’d known I would, “Ah, they can buff that out no problem!”

“Three coins in the fountain…” [crickets chirping]

My favourite line is the most juvenile moment in the film.

“Those aren’t pillows!”

“Wrong way? How do they know which way we’re going?”

[sub]was this from that?[/sub]

My personal favorites…

Del: We’d have more luck playing pick-up sticks with our butt-cheeks than we will getting a flight out of here before daybreak.

and…

Del: You play with your balls alot.
Neal: Oh really?
Del: Yeah, you do more ballhandling in one minute than Larry Bird does in an hour.
Neal: You know what I’d really like?
Del: A couple of more hands and an extra set of balls?

By fluke, I just purchased the DVD yesterday for Mrs. Bernse’s birthday tommorow. We were just talking about the “How do they know which way we’re going?” line. I saw it in Wal-Mart 4 hours later and had to buy it for her.

This movie also has the single best use of a repeated obscenity in any scene in motion picture history. The scene at the car rental counter is beyond classic.

No, no…the best line is when the cop pulls over the smoking shell of the car:

Officer: “Sir, do you think this motor vehicle is safe to drive?”
Candy: “Yes, yes I do!”

I love this movie. Great holiday movie. Perfect Dramedy.

“People train don’t run through Omaha… unless your a hog or a cattle. SNORT!”

“Leave it be! First kid come out sideways, she didn’t even scream.”