I said what I did because people are using the ominous sounding, “She has an autoimmune disease!” to treat her as some broken, Dickensian character with a wasting disease in need of defense and our pity. I’m confident neither her, nor your husband, fit this bill. Using that as justification for Will needing to leap to her defense and strike someone is patently ridiculous, and probably also a host of insulting things to her agency and womanhood that I’m not the best equipped to detail.
All diseases, health issues, conditions, injuries bring with them their own unique challenges, of course. I’m perhaps a little too aware of how our bodies are a miracle of interconnecting processes, and how a wrench in any of those processes can cause a cascade of bad things. The years have taught me how things can always be worse. When I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis, I frequently told myself, “Well, at least I don’t have Crohn’s disease, that’s even worse!” I don’t know if that’s an unusual attitude, but I’m not wrong. Eventually, my diagnosis was changed to Crohn’s disease.
It can always be worse.
I know you’re being sarcastic. Why someone would choose those two diseases to be sarcastic about not having is a mystery, but yes, so much yes. Yay for not having lupus or MS.
My stepsister has lupus, which first expressed itself when she was 22. She had joined the army to become a OR nurse, but it wasn’t long before she couldn’t work. When she got medically discharged, they took good care of her (at least back then, they did that). Really good medical coverage, thank goodness. Decades of doctors, hospital visits, procedures and operations. In the beginning, she had to make frequent trips to Walter Reed in Washington DC, because it was so poorly understood that they were the ones best-equipped to help her. She and the rest of us lived hundreds of miles away from there.
Forty years later, she’s had a kidney transplant from her aging father, and two hip transplants because the pharmacy’s worth of meds she takes every day destroyed the bone marrow. Arthritis comes with lupus in an incredible 2-for-1 deal, and she’s had both knees replaced as well. Lupus brings with it a compromised immune system leaving her open to catching everything that comes her way, and the anti-rejection drugs she takes for her transplant only makes it worse. Like your husband, she has trouble with the sun. She gets horrible rashes and full-on flare-ups if she’s exposed, so she doesn’t go outside except to travel to another place indoors, and she covers up well. . remarkably, she’s still kicking all these years later, metaphorically at least, and active in her church. She’s a strong woman. So many years of pain.
MS is worse than all that.
By way of contrast, two of the things you list as unseen side-effects of alopecia, sweat in the eyes and sunburn, can simultaneously be mitigated with a baseball cap. But yay for not having lupus or MS.
It can always be worse.