Someone Needs to Invent

[Machine_Elf]

@Slithy_Tove

Pneuber , a pneumatic delivery system for meals, groceries, meds, clean underwear, etc.

You’ve never heard of the Alameda-Weehauken burrito delivery tunnel? It’s pneumatic.

[eschereal]

@Slithy_Tove

a pneumatic delivery system for meals, groceries, meds, clean underwear, etc.

and people

Futurama S01E01 - Fry's tube ride

[Ulfreida]

A way to painlessly and instantly remove six billion humans from the earth.

[lum_s_husband]

Can you shave with that edge?

[Ulfreida]

I gotta be me.

[Lumpy]

a D-battery vibrator.

[Senegoid]

@california_jobcase

We need a lime tree that grows limes the size of navel oranges and with the sugar content of a ripe banana. Of course, the regular lime flavor will remain, just much sweeter.

Yum.

There are, however, lemons like that, called Meyer lemons. My neighbor has such a lemon tree. We had an entire thread about that. I’ve never seen or heard of these lemons elsewhere, and I’ve never heard of them in stores.

My neighbor's lemon tree .

My neighbor has a lemon tree that produces lemons unlike others I’ve seen (or tasted). Some nearby neighbors think it’s a distinct variety of lemon, others think it must be some lemon/orange hybrid. I wonder if any Dopers know of this kind of lemon? The lemons are nearly spherical, almost-but-not-quite like oranges. They are definitely lemon-yellow. They taste like lemons, but sweet enough to eat straight, like an orange. They are somewhat lemonade-sweet (but not too sweet) and somewhat le…

[Senegoid]

@velomont

Something that I think would be really useful would be a computer keyboard that is split into two halves and then connected to their respective left and right office chair arms, with the selected keyboard half also having a trackball attached.

There are split keyboards. You can do a google image search for split keyboards to see pictures of many models. I don’t know about how the trackball placement goes. You could probably jury-rig some way to attach to your chair arms.

[Senegoid]

@TRC4941

Also, all cans (vegetables, soups, tuna, etc) should come with a ring/pop-top. I notice there are a lot more of these cans lately. But they all should be like this by now.  

Some of those are more difficult to open than others. For those of us with ancient arthritic fingers, it can be all the more difficult and unpleasant. Such cans might be openable with a regular can opener, depending on the can and the can opener.

A while back, I asked if there is a tool for opening these pop-top cans, and we had a thread about that:

Opening pop-top cans

A lot of canned foods now come in those pop-top cans – the kind where you pull the entire top off. I have a hard time with some of those, due in part of increasing arthritis or maybe just general old-age decrepitude. Can anybody recommend an alternative way of opening these? Is there some trick using any tools I might have around the kitchen? Are there any kitchen tools out there specifically designed to open lids like this? (Some such cans can be opened with a can opener, but not most that…

[thorny_locust]

@Senegoid

There are , however, lemons like that, called Meyer lemons. My neighbor has such a lemon tree. We had an entire thread about that. I’ve never seen or heard of these lemons elsewhere, and I’ve never heard of them in stores.

You can buy the trees, including for growing as a houseplant. Here and I’m sure other places:

Improved Meyer Lemon Citrus Plant | Territorial Seed

[velomont]

@Senegoid

There are split keyboards. You can do a google image search for split keyboards to see pictures of many models. I don’t know about how the trackball placement goes. You could probably jury-rig some way to attach to your chair arms.

True, however, this concept first occurred to me back in the late '90s and, at that time, I assumed that someone would develop (properly as opposed to velomont duct-taping half keyboards to his chair arms ). Alas