There’s a google ad for a trash can cleaning franchise. Franchise? Then again, becoming a trash can cleaning mogul sounds kinda cool. 
Next time they wheel it out, you could turn toward it, click your heels, thrust your palm into the air and yell out “Big pile! Big pile!”
It’s amazing what people will steal. A few years ago, a friend of mine was remodeling her house, and a brand-new toilet that had just been delivered was stolen overnight from her backyard storage shed. Whoever broke into the shed ignored the expensive lawn tractor and other pricey things, and ran off with a toilet. Go figure.
Duct tape? Not only duct tape, but Garage Sale Duct Tape?
You know, I’d love to hear what you guys whisper for sweet nothings.
**lieu[/]b, I think I love you.
This all seams funny untill you realise that the number one thing smuggled over the US/Canadian line is a 3gal toilet.
So much for the 1.6g “Al Gore” toilets
Somehow it’s appropriate that a toilet would be “number one.”
The rubbish bins - supplied by the council - round here have been breeding: I now have four. Hopefully they’ll be removed soon.
Last week, they didn’t take the garbage can. They took the garbage. The nastiest garbage I’ve ever had - my fridge died and I lost everything from my fridge, and it was full of rotting food. It all disappeared. Man, do I live in the ghetto.
Our can is back.
It wasn’t gay marriage.
It wasn’t some conspiracy.
It wasn’t grizzlies.
The can went walk about about 1 mile down the road, which leads us to beleive that some Meddlesome Kids were farkin’ around with it.
We could tell it was ours because magazines of ours were in the bottom with our address label.
It is safe and sound and loaded up with a comforting amount of our Daily Garbage.
$90 saved.
There have been a couple of occasions when I thought someone had stolen one of our garbage cans. Each of those occasions was on a Bad Weather day, with lots of wind. I found the “stolen” trash can after taking a short walk down the street. We live on an E-W street that ends in an empty field on the east end a few houses down from our house, and the field apparently loves to “suck in” trash cans on windy days.
Our trashcans are relatively cheap things from Walmart, though–with so many maggots I think I would welcome a reason to purchase new ones…
And I rolled my eyes at my husband, who wrote our address in black permanent marker on our garbage cans. And on the lids. Along with numbering them. I thought it was overly cautious. I hate to have to tell him that he was wise, after all.
“…I’m stuck on you”? 
Come to think of it, there’s probably 101 kinky uses for duct tape that I’d never entertained prior to this thread. What next, WD-40***** for Valentine’s Day? :eek:
*****WD-40 is not to be used in small, confined, unventilated areas and is not to be applied topically, internally, inhaled, or ingested. The above and aforementioned reference to WD-40 is socially irresponsible and was intended for humorous purposes only. The author rejects any liability for bodily harm, injury, or chromosomal damage sustained by kinky mis-use of WD-40 as a sex lubricant. Whew!
We had an aluminum stepladder stolen from our yard. Not all that surprising, but the thief left a perfectly good wooden stepladder in it’s place. This occasioned a certain amount of head scratching around Chez Finger.
I never heard of thieves trading up.
Many years ago I heard a ruckus outside my window and when I looked out I saw a man had dumped the trash out of our city garbage can (the ones with wheels) and was running off with it.
The police laughed when I called, but later that night they caught a guy with a garbage can full of electronics he’d stolen from my neighbor a few streets over. He was just rolling that garbage can down the middle of a major street at three in the morning…I guess in his mind he didn’t look the least bit suspicious.
I just posted a rant myself because today someone busted my car window and stole my stereo. Thieves suck no matter what they take.
Dammit that’s another keyboard ruined 
I’m glad you got your garbage can back and all, but I have a slightly different problem. I have 2 defunct garbage cans. Wheels gone, handles broken, splits in the sides. I want to get rid of them. I left them empty with a note on them that said “trash”. They didn’t pick them up. How do I get rid of them; take the empty cans to the dump? ?
After I’ve already posted in this thread, I read it this morning, scratched my head, and wondered, why do you have to buy a garbage can for outside? Doesn’t the city give you one? I don’t think we’d even be allowed to have our own, the ones we have are designed for the Garbage Monster to come and pick it up.
Is your address stenciled on them? If not, maybe you can just stencil *someone else’s * address on… someone from a few blocks away, whom you don’t know, of course. 
Glad to hear your can has returned from its neighborhood tour, Shirley. Now you can use that $90 on something *really * romantic. Like maybe some garden mulch?
Sadly, I know the answer to this one. You will first need to gather the following:
- A hacksaw
- Some gloves
- Clothes that you wouldn’t miss if you burned them afterwards
- A fresh set of Clothes that you wouldn’t miss if you burned them afterwards laid out on your bed
- An empty Hefty bag next to your shower
- All the intestinal fortitude that you can muster
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Don old clothes & gloves.
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Set out hack saw.
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Breathe quickly for two minutes & then hold breath.
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Get the smelly stinking plastic recepticle that the squirrels/rats have gnawed through and that the maggots and bacterium have orgies on.
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Grasp the can with one hand and saw for all your worth with the other. Unlike the garter belt you caught at your cousin’s wedding, this time You Really Do need to go up the other side.
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When you have cut it into quarter sections, drop them into the replacement garbage can and place a plastic Hefty bag filled with garbage goodness inside afterwards to hold the pieces in place against the side of the can.
6a) Discard hacksaw blade. It served you valiantly and to be honest you’d never be able to use it on anything used inside your house again anyway.
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Walk quickly into the bathroom where you normally shower afterward completing all of step 6. Strip off Everything into the Hefty bag. Everything.
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Shower hardy. Scrub like you’re on a bad LSD trip and you see cockroaches crawling on your skin.
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Repeat step 8. Keep scrubbing until every square inch of exposed skin is scrubbed raw and cleaner than the white level in ‘The Andromeda Strain’.
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Resist impulse to use ‘Fist of Death’ on anyone who says ‘Gee, you smell funny’ for the rest of the day.
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Take the trash cans out to the curb the night before the next trash pick-up.