Songs About Crime

Sexual Assault of a Child:
“Prison Sex” - Tool
“Janie’s Got a Gun” - Aerosmith
“Jordan, Minnesota” - Big Black (great, scary song)
“Kentucky F*** Daddy”- Brutal Juice (ditto)

Robbery With a Deadly Weapon:
“I Fought the Law” - Sonny Curtis and The Crickets (popularized by the Bobby Fuller Four)

Burglary with Intent to Commit Sexual Assault:
Tyler (I Will Be With Her Tonight) - The Toadies

Seuxal Assault and/or Murder:
“Possum Kingdom” - The Toadies

Serial Murder:
“Dead Skin Mask” - Slayer (about serial killer Ed Gein)

“Angel of Death” - Slayer (about Auschwitz - Birkenau “doctor” Josef Mengele)
“Holiday in Cambodia” - Dead Kennedys (about Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge)


Capital Murder:
“I Shot the Sheriff” - Bob Marley and the Wailers
“Cop Killer” - Body Count featuring Ice T
“Deep Cover (187 on an Undercover Cop)” - Dr. Dre featuring Snoop Dog

Mack the Knife

Dammit, that’s what I was gonna say.

So, I’ll suggest “You’re Always Welcome At Our House” from the Muppets

Rape (possibly gang rape)
“Hold Her Down” - Toad the Wet Sprocket

Cocaine use and dealing
“White Lines” - Grandmaster Flash

Murder: Sugar - “A Good Idea

Infanticide/Killing your own child (possibly): PJ Harvey - “Down By the Water

Third Eye Blind’s Semi Charmed Life is about Sex and Crystal Meth.

Tom Lehrer.

I Hold Your Hand In Mine.

The Irish Ballad.

(I’m on dial up so I hope these are the right ones.)

Marijuana usage: “The Chronic” by Dr. Dre, among millions of other songs

Rape and self-mutilation - Mr. Turnkey, by the underrated Zager & Evans (known mostly for their hit In The Year 2525.) It’s a song about a rapist who nails his wrist to the wall of a jail cell. (It’s not clear where he got the hammer, or the nail. And the walls are apparently made of wood.)

That version is an edited version for the vinyl single - the original version, on the actual 2525 album, has a Moog synthesizer part, and the lyrics are slightly different (“there’s been a rape in Wichita Falls” instead of “I forced that girl in Wichita Falls”.) I recommend hearing the actual album version here, though you’ll have to download an .ogg file. It’s much better.

Statutory Rape (possibly) - Gypsies Tramps and Thieves
Theft - In the Ghetto

The Curse of Millhaven, Nick Cave - arson, mass murder.
97 Bonnie and Clyde, Eminem - wife-killing.

Bank robbery

Lots of quirky crims in Fred, by Zager & Evans. Among the crimes in the song:

[li]Killing of a frog with a kitchen knife[/li][li]Mutilation of a bird’s wing with a slingshot[/li][li]Killing of a Guinea Hen by wrapping its beak in masking tape so it starves to death[/li][li]Robbery of a local Dairy Queen[/li][li]War crimes committed during military service (possibly)[/li][li]Killing of a man by a punch in the face with a cast on hand[/li][/ul]

All at the hands of the title character.

Cannibalism and feeding of humans to a dog - In My House by Zager & Evans.

I Fought the Law – Bobby Fuller Four
Folsom Prison Blues – Johnny Cash (murder)
I Don’t Like Mondays – Boomtown Rats (spree killing)
Excitable Boy – Warren Zevon (murder, rape)
Uncle Ernie – The Who (molestation)
Stagger Lee/Stack O’ Lee/Stagolee – traditional (murder)
Wrong 'em Boyo – The Clash (murder – based upon “Stagger Lee”)
Much of the score for Sweeney Todd
Psycho Killer – Talking Heads
Don’t Take Me Alive – Steely Dan (murder)
Guys are Not Proud – the Anemic Boyfriends (bestiality)
Maxwell’s Silver Hammer – the Beatles (murder)
More Tom Lehrer
The Old Dope Peddler (drugs)
My Home Town (murder, arson, possible sex crimes)

“Murder by Numbers,” The Police

John Wayne Gacy, Jr. - Sufjan Stevens (serial murder)
Killer’s Eyes - The Kinks (murder)
In the Middle of the Night - Madness (underwear thievery)

Income tax evasion - Reginald Ludwig by Zager & Evans.

The Night Chicago Died - Paper Lace

Johnny - Sheena Easton

Trouble In The Shadows - Sheena Easton