If people start following this mom’s lead by purchasing letters for their sad sack kids, what is the worse that would happen? Would athletes stop trying out for varsity sports? Would the teams start losing all the games? Would the students lose their school spirit? Or would the school figure out another way to honor their “best”?
There are schools all over the country who don’t do the precious letter thing. My high school didn’t. Somehow we managed.
You beat me to it. It’s not as if the kid (or his mom) is forging some official document stating that he was a member of the varsity basketball team, complete with signatures and a stamp from the local notary public. It’s just a letter for his school jacket, something which quite literally in this case can be purchased at the store.
This kid is a ‘special snowflake’. He goes to special classes, he might have a special one to one aid, he gets special attention. And as a society, we should allow him a few special privileges, because there’s a good chance he wont even get to see his 50th birthday. And isn’t that special.
I feel it should be pointed out yet again that the school did not issue this kid a letter. His mother did. Had everyone ignored it, the kid might have felt, briefly, like he was part of the group, and no one, not a single student, would have mistaken him for a varsity player. They would have taken one look at him and known exactly how he got that letter, ensuring the continued honor of the sacred badge.
I think without realizing it, you’re helping to add to Shodan’s point, not take away from it. Your Ph.D means something because your particular institution does not give that distinction away just for trying. You did not receive it from a diploma mill.
monstro, take a look at this website [edit: see below], where anyone can get print out a Ph.D. certificate. Do you want to make this website illegal? Do you think it invalidates all your hard work and recognition?
Because if you don’t, then maybe you didn’t add to Shodan’s point after all.
Edit: good grief, it just occurred to me that linking to that website could look like promoting illegal activity if you think I’m advocating using those diplomas fraudulently. I’m removing the link, but anyone can google a website like this. Note, of course, the difference between using a website like that for personal gain–a key part of the definition of fraud–and what would be analogous to this situation, which would be, say, a dude with mild Down’s Syndrome and a sense of humor about it who bought an obviously fake Ph.D. from MIT in applied robotics or something.
You’re not getting it either. She already inferred that she didn’t care about what goes on at other institutions, so you don’t have to bother to ask. Instead, ask Monstro if she would have minded at the time she was awarded her Ph.D if her particular institution gave the same grades and Ph.D to anyone who tried. Or even those that didn’t try.
If everybody can display a letter then what’s the point of them? They become totally valueless. I sympathize with the kid, it’s his mom who’s at fault here. She should have known better.
Why would I ask her that? What does that have to do with the situation we’re discussing? Spell your analogy out, please–not because I think I don’t get it, but because if you do, I think you’ll realize just how disanalogous it is.
Did anyone notice in the video that the kid apparently doesn’t even know the rules of basketball, much less play at a varsity level? He’s seen being passed the ball, then starts running off with it in his hands (a clear case of traveling)…
Once again, the school gave the boy nothing. This Ph.D argument only works if he gets to use his letter for a football scholarship, or get his name etched on the trophy, or some other ridiculous scenario. The letter, worn by the boy with Downs, means nothing, except possibly to him. No one could possibly see it as diminishing the meaning of their letter, because everyone knows that the Special ed kid’s badge is fake, except for him. EVERYONE. KNOWS. It is not the same honor. It is not the same letter. It can never be the same, and everyone knows it the second they look at him.
Had the jacket belonged to an older brother who lent it to him, would that be okay? Why?
A Ph.D diploma is an official document. Grades are an official matter of record (in a way, as part of your transcript). What we’re talking about here is a letter that you sew on to a jacket. This kid is not being included in the official record books, he is not listed as part of the team in the school year book, or even posing for a photo with the team. Equating the letter with any of those things, is like equating a shirt that says “Superbowl Champions” with actually winning the Superbowl.
Well, I’m just going to say, for the final time, that I feel giving him the letter is more about pity, and seeing him as “The Disabled Kid”, rather than an individual. Like patting yourself on the back, and saying, “look at this good deed we did!” It seems there is an actual letter for the disabled team, and I think, if he actually earned that, it should mean more. Treat him as an individual, not a fucking charity case.
(As for the whole, “well, he doesn’t understand!!!” The article did not say how severe his disability was, so that’s just speculation)
Because you asked her “Do you want to make this website illegal?” which is a question that need not be answered. She already made it clear that she doesn’t care. about other institutions. The question I mentioned is relevant to the discussion Shodan and her were having.
No, if you said you didn’t get it, I’d be happy to spell it out for you. I appreciate you asking me to do it for my sake, but I get it just fine and I’m not being “disingenuous.”
i understand the analogy to a Ph.D is not a perfect one, Clawdio, and that the importance level is not equivalent and that the student and/or his mother just want him to wear the letter and not make the Varsity distinction official. I am merely pointing out that Monstro declaring she wouldn’t care if other institutions are diploma mills wouldn’t bother her because what her Ph.D represents would be unchanged is not as relevant as how she would feel if her particular institution were a diploma mill.
This particular school cares how Varsity letters are treated…in their school.
Maybe a better analogy would be military ribbons (yet a far from perfect one). How would you feel about military members buying any ribbons they want and wearing them on their uniforms? I’m not talking about claiming they earned them on official documents or wearing them at official functions, but just wearing them on and off base.
Dad wasn’t excusing his behavior - he was explaining why sometimes in life justice doesn’t happen, bad things happen to good people, and sometimes even when you try your hardest you don’t come in first.
All of which is true.
Mom did an end-run around the rules - the rules that say you have to earn a spot on a particular team to get a particular award.
Giving the kid an unearned award doesn’t fix anything - it doesn’t make him less autistic, it doesn’t fix his chromosomes, it doesn’t make him the equal of anyone else.
I think his MOM needs to learn that - I’m sorry the kid has problems, but giving him unearned honors and awards won’t fix jack about the situation.
There’s nothing wrong with some sort of certificate of participation if you actually participated. You don’t get first place, though, unless you actually come in first.
What next? Are you going to give him a driver’s license even if he can’t pass a driving test to make him feel better? Or make his mom feel better? If he can’t get a driver’s license will mom pay to have a fake one made for him?
The problem is that he is a charity case. Adopted Down Syndrome kid, with autism no less. The only way he could be more of a charity case is if he had liver disease.
And a question for those about “pity”… is it intrinsically wrong to feel pity for someone (and in turn, help them in some way that makes their lives one iota better) who doesn’t even understand the concept, and therefore wouldn’t be as put off by it by other people that do? Although I’m not saying that this young man in incapable of grokking that, but for those that aren’t? If having folks feel sorry for me is not something I grasp, then I don’t really think it would bother me at all if anything was done for me as a result of it. It just wouldn’t be on my ever be on my radar.