starting a car that hasn't been started in 2 years.

I am interested in purchasing an auto that has been sitting for about 2 years without being moved or started. It belongs to an edlerly couple that has more automobiles than needed. The battery is, of course, dead and will be replaced with a new one. Assuming the car was in working order before it was parked, what should I do before getting it started?
The car is an '85 cheverolet caprice classic with a 5.0L V8 engine.

A car I had started fine after a year and a bit when the battery was changed. It was about 10 years old. If it doesnt start, just spray a few bits with WD-40, that stuff fixes everything!

Drain and change the oil. Old oil collects nasty stuff. Idealy, you should drain the gas as well, but this might not be practical. Get as much fresh gas in as you can. You may want to put a couple drops of “Marvel’s Mystery Oil” (basicly ATF fluid) down the spark plug holes if you are worried about initial start-up lubrication. Check the coolant level, as it has probably evaportated some away. Check the hoses and belts for cracks, as they may have dried out/rotted. Put air in the tires and check for major cracking. When you are pretty sure the fluids are in it to stay, apply fresh voltage and fire that sucker up! Starting fluid may be needed to give it a shot of juice until the fuel pump gets his groove on. Watch it close for the first few minutes, especially the temprature. Make sure it looks like the thermostat is operational. It may not want to idle if gasoline had evaporated in the carb and left it gummed up. Sometimes, stuff kinda works it way free and the beast will run correctly, but sometimes you need to tear that carb apart. Good luck! Before you throw it in Drive, check the coolant again (if safe to do so), check the tranny fluid and check the brake fluid. Make sure the brakes haven’t siezed up.

I live in an extreamly dry area, so I’m telling you what I would do here. I actually start stuff up that has been sitting for long periods pretty often. I have over 10 cars lying around and am always looking for more! I have two old Fords that sit for months at a time without starting. Shame on me!

The car will have picked up some condensation, and therefore rust, in all kinds of places. Before you crank it, certainly drain and replace the oil to get out any water that might be in there, and any other gunk that might have settled to the bottom that you don’t want back recirculating in the engine. Check all the hoses for cracking or hardness, or better yet simply replace them all (they’re cheap). The ignition wires may be hard and cracked too, and they’re cheap enough to easily replace as well. If the car has a distributor, take off the cap and look for any corrosion or wear in there, too, and check the coil casing for cracks while you’re at it. Check the brakes for rust and freedom of movement - you might be looking at a new caliper or two. Replace the brake fluid and power steering fluid if you feel up to it. Check the exhaust for mouse nests (it happens) before they get a big surprise, and look for corrosion on the pipes, mufflers, and converters (I think that car has 2). There will probably be some water in the gas tank, too - a can of DryGas might handle it, but if you can drain the tank and put in a fresh load, that’s better.

Before the Big Moment, it might be a good idea to disconnect the ignition so that the engine will crank over a few times with its new, fresh oil circulating before coming up to speed. Then reconnect the ignition and fire away. The worst case is that, what the hell, it’s only an '85 Caprice anyway.