Steal copper and have sex

In a twist ending to a mine rescue that didn’t captivate the world, the four rescuees have been determined to have gone into the mine to steal copper wiring and to join the Mile Low Club. For one of the guys, it wasn’t his first time stealing copper. (It hasn’t been determined if it was his first time having sex.) And in the most surprising aspect of this story, none of it took place in Florida.

To be fair, Florida really doesn’t have the geography to allow for mines, or they’d probably be doing this sort of thing there, too.

How do these guys find women who are willing to travel deep into a mine to have sex?

You can always find people willing to go down.

They promised them a long shaft with bulging veins, plunging deeply.

So last weekend me and the missus was ‘stealing copper’…

And the further down you go, the hotter it gets.

And I’m all out of copper!

You’ll never take me alive, copper! At least, not for about twenty minutes…


With the promise of stealing mine grade copper and then selling that copper for money later used to purchase methamphetamine. I would have rathered this to be Florida than West Virginia.

I’m just suggesting that Steal Copper and Have Sex would be an excellent band name.

Arrest warrants have been issued for all 4. They had already issued one for Eddie Williams.

Seems like they already were punished by their ordeal but in the mine. They could have easily suffocated in the limited air.

I guess the prosecutor wants to make examples of them and discourage other copper thieves.

Also supervillain duo.

Hmmmm…I’m definitely spending my weekends wrong.

Yeah, but with a bit of imagination and use of homophones, you could have Steel, Copper, and Have Sex, who I would probably pay to see.

Marianna, Florida, has Florida Caverns State Park. I believe the cave tour is self-guided, if you’re planning to have underground relations in the Sunshine State. You’re welcome.