Stephen Hawking 70th birthday mystery: Women

[Senegoid]

Stephen Hawkings biggest unsolved mysteries:
(1) How he survived so long
(2) Biggest mystery according to Hawking himself: Women

First, a serious article about his up-coming 70th birthday:

“Stephen Hawking to turn 70, defying disease” by Maria Cheng
http://news.yahoo.com/stephen-hawking-turn-70-defying-disease-102610210.html

Lede:

@Associated Press

CAMBRIDGE, England (AP) — British scientist Stephen Hawking has decoded some of the most puzzling mysteries of the universe but he has left one mystery unsolved: How he has managed to survive so long with such a crippling disease.

Then, there’s this:

“Women are a mystery to British physicist Hawking”
http://news.yahoo.com/women-mystery-british-physicist-hawking-135814776.html

@Reuters

LONDON (Reuters) - The biggest mystery in the universe perplexing one of the world’s best known scientists is – women.

When New Scientist magazine asked “Brief History of Time” author Stephen Hawking what he thinks about most, the Cambridge University professor renowned for unravelling some of the most complex questions in modern physics answered: “Women. They are a complete mystery.”

You need only imagine the reader comments to that one. A sampling:

@Stan

Stephen, just think of women as either black holes, dark energy or dark matter. They can suck you in, pull you apart, reduce you to the smallest element and spin you in circles at near the speed of light. And like gravity, their pull is irresistible to the average male mass.

@Michelle

I don’t understand women either, despite having been one for forty-plus years now.

@Retired_LC

Gentlemen, we are screwed. Stephen Hawking can figure out black holes in the universe but he can’t figure out women? What chance do we normal people have?

@Joe Flor

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by 90%…
It’s called a Wedding Cake.

@Glen

If a man states an opinion in the woods and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?

@Packer Fan In Michigan

Someone once said that the difference between men and women was that men only want one thing from every woman while women want everything from only one man.

@Kurt

Stephen Hawking announces the biggest mystery in the universe is women. In related news, Tiger Wood’s ex-wife bull-dozes a 12 million dollar mansion… I think he might be on to something! [Link added.]

[Telperion]

He makes it sound so easy. In my experience, women are more like 3.5 billion mysteries.

[Shakester]

Cue women complaining that they make perfect sense and that all any women really wants is to be loved and appreciated, followed by a long, complex, and entirely nonsensical list of reasons why she didn’t mean by you when she said that.

[robotic_panda]

Really! Why don’t dudes just do what they do with chicks, but with dudes! It’d be so much easier! …What?

[enomaj]

Elin Nordegren bulldozes a $12 million home. Well, damn!

[Kozmik]

I read Stephen Hawking 700th birthday mystery: Women.

[Fool_in_the_Rain]

Women are a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an en…

…what OW!

uhm…Women are beautiful caring wonderful people who are just misunderstood.

[Drunky_Smurf]

@robotic_panda

Really! Why don’t dudes just do what they do with chicks, but with dudes! It’d be so much easier! …What?

Like smacking them upside the head for being out of the kitchen?

[handsomeharry]

@Drunky_Smurf

Like smacking them upside the head for being out of the kitchen?

Yes…or *other *times when they need it.

[Theophane]

Who needs women when you’ve got the entire universe on the end of a string?