Maybe it’s silly to feel that sense of “Oh thank God he’s not my boyfriend anymore” after several years and moving on into a wonderful long term relationship with my SO, but so what. You have no idea of what horrors of future misery I spared myself when I got rid of that blue eyed, bald, athlete gone to seed, numb nuts whose lies and treachery I was stupid enough to buy into. At the moment I ditched him, he was “finally ready to move in together and see if we could make it” after three years of HELL. He cajoled me with poetry lifted from others (obscure enough that I didn’t know the authors, but not obscure enough that I didn’t see through it later) to make himself seem “deep”, kept enough of a distance that I was intrigued but acted interested enough that I stuck around, and LIED LIKE A BASTARD the whole relationship!!
The learning experience was singular and intense. The emotions were high and I lost weight. He - almost - had me convinced that I was either crazy or a control freak because there was -something- not quite right— YEAH. HE WAS CONSTANTLY DATING A SERIES OF TWENTY YEAR OLDS IN REVOLVING DOOR FASHION BEHIND MY BACK. And convincing me I was “crazy” when I suspected something. Lying with full, sincere, yet somehow naggingly smarmy eye contact – when all the evidence pointed one way, he had a million (almost plausible) reasons to point the other. The mind games and endless bending of reality finally, ultimately made me literally SICK. The feelings of “being in love” and “sticking it out like a loyal g/f even though everyone else thinks he is a royal bastard” and “complete and perfect trust” finally gave way to the sinking ship of reality when I realized… This is never going to change. He is going to continue to parade young girls around when I’m working and he’s not, or on weekends when I’m not around, FOREVER (or at least until he is so decrepit that young girls won’t hang around anymore… then he’ll probably switch to older ones!!!)…
I can’t even begin to describe the utter creepiness of someone so conscience-free that he can lie like that, yet convince someone that a. The incident(s) was (were) their fault, or so misinterpreted that anyone else would have handled it “better” or b. the incident(s) was(were) *all in their imagination * and never happened, even with glaring physical evidence and/or inconsistencies. Yet the charming, slick facade he presented is still fooling people to this day. To someone who has only spent a few months with someone like this, he is your dream come true. To anyone who really gets to know him, they should run. Run as soon as there is the slightest suspicion of anything. Because that is only the beginning of the horror show that is a “relationship” with “that asshole”.
The realization that he will always cheat and lie, and that the situation was no longer tolerable, formed over the last few months of the “relationship” when, after trying to “rebuild trust” (his words, as if his cheating was MY problem) he totally went off on me by phone while I was hanging out with a male friend at home. What kind of fucked up double standard would cause a guy to think “Telling my g/f I’m having dinner with my folks when really I am taking my 18 year old Chinese exchange student neighbor out for a date is okay (and if my g/f complains she is crazy and a bitch), but my g/f playing guitar with her male friend, WITH MY TOTAL AND COMPLETE KNOWLEDGE, is somehow NOT”!!! WTF!!! That night, I knew I couldn’t take it anymore. My “life” with the manipulative, lying, sack of shit I had so mistakenly elevated to the status of my “boyfriend” was finally over. I dodged a bullet by running from the insanity before cohabiting. I feel so sorry for whomever that asshole might be with now.
Sometimes, I just like to relive that sense of relief. Thank God it’s over! Thank God I don’t have to deal with someone so charming, yet so evil! Thank God I have a man who refuses to lie to me, even when it hurts to hear the truth! I love it! I’d rather get my feelings pinched once in a while by someone who loves me enough to tell the truth, than to ever get anywhere near a lying, sex-addicted, pimpwhoremamma’sboy, sociopathic FUCK like “that asshole” was!
Just wanted to get that off my chest. Ahem.
